"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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How to ask her to get tested?

Love_Games?!?

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Hey guys,

Last night I had sex with my gf without a condom for the first time. I pulled out so I didn't finish in her. She is currently on the pill and I see her take it and check every time I'm over to make sure shes taking it consistently.

However she's been in a few relationships in her life and I'm sure she had a fling last summer before we started dating. So I'd like to ask her to get tested so I can be comfortable if we ever decide to do it again this way.

How do I ask her to get tested without offending her. Also she was my first and knows that so I can't really use the "I'll get tested with you as well..." there wouldn't be a point.

Thanks guys, and please don't make me feel like an idiot... I know I should have asked her to get tested before I made the decision to lose the condom.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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FunnyMan

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camdry90 said:
Is this a serious question? i mean if you already fvcked her without a condom theres no point for a test, b/c whatever it is she might of had you will most likely now have as well... you may as well get yourself tested just to make sure your clean... always dome up if ur not sure about a chick man...
yeah, get yourself tested, dont bother asking her there would be no point
 

The Greek

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You're not guaranteed to catch whatever she might have on one occasion. Get her tested bro.
 

FunnyMan

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The Greek said:
You're not guaranteed to catch whatever she might have on one occasion. Get her tested bro.
get yourself tested and use a rubber from now on. Thats what I meant
 

Iceberg

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camdry90 said:
Is this a serious question? i mean if you already fvcked her without a condom theres no point for a test, b/c whatever it is she might of had you will most likely now have as well... you may as well get yourself tested just to make sure your clean... always dome up if ur not sure about a chick man...
That's not true. You don't always get the disease on the first occasion of unprotected sex. There have been studies where married couples were having sex for a year or two at a time before one of them caught HIV from the other.

STDs are like any other kind of virus. Just because you have the flu, and you cough on me does not mean that I'm 100% guaranteed to get the flu.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

Read more...

Love_Games?!?

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I will go get tested... but no one's really answered my question. How exactly do you bring this kinda thing up without having the girl get really offended?!
 

horaholic

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be straight up. There is no reason she should get offended by it, unless you insinuate she's a slut. Just play it off that you're paranoid about std's and just want some peace of mind.
 

catman

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Just tell her that it benifits both of you to get tested which is true. And cheak my hepitities thread on the mm section ;)
 

facadegeniality

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yeap, camdry is right.

OP, u shld have worried about this BEFORE you had unprotected sex with her.

Now u can only wait for the window period before u can start testing for STDs and receive an accurate, confirmative result.

diff diseases have different window periods.

edit: to answer your question. just show her on the local health website/any local hospital website that it is recommended for anybody who is sexually active to test for STDs. alot of them have no symptoms and condom is a not a 100% sure protection. that alone is enough to warrant a need for the tests.

since the sexual history dates pretty far back..she can get tested now and then later again, well after the window periods to be sure.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

Read more...

Mantis Toboggan

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facadegeniality said:
yeap, camdry is right.

OP, u shld have worried about this BEFORE you had unprotected sex with her.

Now u can only wait for the window period before u can start testing for STDs and receive an accurate, confirmative result.

diff diseases have different window periods.
Camdry is wrong. He said that the original poster would now have any STDs that this girl has. That is untrue. You don't necessarily get an STD the first time you have unprotected sex with an infected person. Yes, it CAN happen, but viruses are very hard to spread. Bacteria is a slightly different story, but the facts remain: It's not too late or too early for him to be concerned.

My friend was banging some girl who had herpes (no, it's REALLY my friend), and the b***h didn't tell him about it until AFTER they got drunk and had unprotected sex. He freaked out, went to the doctor, and fortunately didn't get anything. But while it is dumb to have unprotected sex, it is not guaranteed that you'll get infected just from one instance of unprotected sex.

And to answer his question...just be honest with the girl. She won't be insulted by talking about getting an STD test. It's good for both of you.
 

BigJimbo

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Why should you care about the feelings of a tramp? Quit putting nasty tramps up on a pedestal. She is what she is. I can almost promise you that she has HPV. HPV can do some ugly things to your Mr. Tinkle. Don't worry though. It might take a few years before the yucky stuff starts to appear on Mr. Tinkle. One morning you will get up and go take your morning pee-pee and BAM there it is.
 

facadegeniality

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@ Mantis Toboggan; Iceberg: no matter how much your claims are documented or not, you are not the virus. even a doctor would not be able to confidently say the chance of getting STDs, if any.

Would you leave such things to chance? It's always better to be safe and sorry. And this is also for a peace of mind. i see no wrong how we have stated the chances to catch STDs are because there;s no telling.

Love_Games?!?, please do get checked asap and follow up. you should persuade her too because of her history. like i said, u can do a search online...all sexual health websites will urge anyone sexually active to get tested REGULARLY because even condoms do fail. To me its the best reason to get anyone to be tested for STDs. Do it soon.

Take care.
 

Love_Games?!?

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Thanks for the great advice everyone. She's coming over tonight so I'll be sure to tell her that I'd like some piece of mind and would like to go get checked out together.

Once again, thx guys!
 

Diaforetikos

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Just ask her the same way the guy from Unforgivable would ask her;

"you dirty down there b!*ch?" She would say, "uh, what?" Then you say, "I don't repeat myself. Especially fa ho's. You lucky I want an answer b!*ch. Now, you dirty down there fag***?" She starts crying, "I was gonna get checked next week." Then you say, "B, that ain't soon enough... Ho. Go get checked RRRRIGHT NNNOW!"

And that's how you ask your girlfriend.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Love_Games?!?

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Diaforetikos said:
Just ask her the same way the guy from Unforgivable would ask her;

"you dirty down there b!*ch?" She would say, "uh, what?" Then you say, "I don't repeat myself. Especially fa ho's. You lucky I want an answer b!*ch. Now, you dirty down there fag***?" She starts crying, "I was gonna get checked next week." Then you say, "B, that ain't soon enough... Ho. Go get checked RRRRIGHT NNNOW!"

And that's how you ask your girlfriend.
Can I use Cun* instead of b!*ch?!
 

Pathgen

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God, just tell her that you are worried about yourself and that it got you thinking that it might be smart to have you both tested. If she seems hesitant tell her you will go with her and do it also. She shouldn't have a problem with that and that way you aren't accusing her of anything, your worried about "yourself"
 

Accension

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Once after sex, I said to my current girlfriend "I'm booking an appointment [to get tested] and I'd like you to come babe- it's good policy." No she wasn't offended because I said it casually maybe, but I did get an O-K look :).

I like the "Let's both get tested together." line.
I've used it before and if she asks why just tell her it's good policy and she's no exception no matter how cute and innocent looking.

After that, she'll smile and say "Oh, all right."
Do it man- she might seem clean but we're just being smart here.
 
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