How to answer if a girl ask "Are you interested in me?"

[yeah!]

I am still learning so please go easy on me.

A girl whom I have been going out with wanted to talk to me via IM today. She said she had something serious to tell me. After some greetings she asked me straight up if I am interested in her. I just told her 'I just wanna know you better but respect her for being so direct so yes' and promptly got the LJBF line.

From my interactions with her before this conversation online, I already knew she had plummeting interest so this LJBF line was inevitable. In fact I was expecting it.

Is there any way to salvage the situation during the IM conversation or is it inevitable in view of the plummeting interest?

Thanks

 

[Arizona iced tea]

well what you have to look at here is why it was asked... in this case she asked you because you don't seem like the kinda guy she wants to be with, and it wasn't clear enough to her whether you liked her or if you were just a friend. That second part in itself is a problem, because it should be obvious that you have an interest in her when you are "going out" with her, but on the same page always remember not to put her on the pedestal because you are the one to be chased. but from what i can see you probably just hung out as friends, and thats how she sees you now.

so after seeing this you need to look at what you did and understand why it didn't work. the person you showed her wasnt dating material, therefore you wont get her interested in dating you. you need to just be yourself and do what you would do no matter what. if it doesnt work out with her, or the next girl, too bad for them... just focus on you, not fixing you, but being you and it will all fall into place.

 

[Furyguy]

How to answer if a girl ask "Are you interested in me?"

No.

 

[Arizona iced tea]

No.

lying gets you nowhere...

 

[Jitterbug]

Is there any way to salvage the situation during the IM conversation or is it inevitable in view of the plummeting interest?

It is inevitable, but I wouldn't discuss such things on IM to start with. I'd tell her that if it's serious, meet me in person, then log off.

 

[bigjohnson]

"I'm still talking to you, yes?"

 

[Pathgen]

"Are you interested in me?"
"There was something interesting about you, but im not sold on the idea yet sorry."

Probably wouldnt have helped your case, but thats what i would have said

 

[Pathgen]

"Are you interested in me?"
"There was something interesting about you, but im not sold on the idea yet sorry."

Wouldnt have really helped your case maybe, but thats what i would say

 

[Jitterbug]

A witty line isn't gonna get your arse out of the Friend Zone, fellas.

 

[MisterMcGee]

"Yup

 

[Igetit!]

I am still learning so please go easy on me.

A girl whom I have been going out with wanted to talk to me via IM today.

I'd like to know how long you'd been going out with this girl before this IM conversation came up.

After some greetings she asked me straight up if I am interested in her.

Now this is weird. A woman asking a straightup/direct/non-game playing question? About dating? Ususally when this happens it means that something was wrong with the way you two interacted with each other prior to her saying this. Just like my signature says,"What you see is not the problem,what you see is the result of the problem. Her putting you in the friendzone wasn't the problem,it was the result of the problem.

Somewhere after the two of you starting seeing each other,YOU slipped up and took a wrong turn. You took a wrong turn,so naturally,you ended up at a place you didn't want to be (friendzone). Just like driving a car. You can already have in mind from the beginning where you want to go,but if you take a wrong turn,even unintentionally ,you'll end up somewhere you hadn't plan on going.

You want to know how to answer a girl if she asks if you're interested in her.
You can say whatever you want. This thing is is that if things were going right throughout the whole time you've known each other,this question would never have come up in the first place. Just her asking it suggest there is something amiss.

Is there any way to salvage the situation during the IM conversation or is it inevitable in view of the plummeting interest?
Thanks

I say no,but I'm sure some of the other members here will tell you otherwise.

 

[sharkbeat]

She's probably LJBF you long before she asked that questions. She judged you based on your behaviors and what you had said to her. That question is just the finale to let you know that she's not interested in you. It didn't matter you said "yes" or "no". She'd still LJBF you. You said "yes", so she was like "look, let's not". If you had said "no", she'd use that against you in the future whenever you make advances to her. "omg, I thought you were not interested in me!?" and whatever crap and drama she's capable of pulling off.

edit:
exactly as Igetit! said. There's no way to salvage a plummeting interest at this point. As a matter of fact, the more you try to show interest in her, the smaller the chance you have with her.

 

[Darth]

How about "I don't know yet."

 

[SuavePlaya]

LOL.... I would prefer to do it in person also. Why did you hide your emotions when she was pratically begging you to pimp her mind. What you should have done was tell her how you felt for example Yes, dina I feel a strong connection between us and It's like a strong energy in my belly do you understand this? she will say yes. There are always different ways of saying it, but you get the point right women like hearing emotional things. The way you responded it won't be too long until you land in that friendzone.

 

[shaunuk]

"C+F" is all very well, but way too many lads see it as the ultimate way to be suave+mysterious. At the question "are you interested in me", answering "there was something intruiging about you, but blahblahblah" is just a bit weird. If you're "going out with her", then yes, you are obviously fvcking interested (at least somewhat). So why be conceited and pseudo-suave, which just looks try-hard.

IMO, saying yes would've been the best answer.

 

[SuavePlaya]

Answering just yes is too simple. If you ask a chick do you like me and she just says yes that convo ends there. What you have to do is stimulate her mind make her think she made the right decision in asking you.

 

[Allurre]

if a girl EVER ask you that question, NEVER give in.

Be indirect about it, confuse her, it'll pique her interest level.

Either tell answer "Well, what do you think?"
or simply tell her "maybe.. only time can tell"

Keep it simple. Don't over complicate the situation.

 

[Jaggs]

Create a strong playful frame (Won't work if you don't have one) and say haha you wish!

 

[shaunuk]

People on this site are guilty of overcomplicating and overthinking things sometimes. My opinion is this...sometimes a cigar really is just a cigar.

 

[yeah!]

Thanks for all your responses.

Like I said on my first post, when she told me she wanted to talk on IM instead of calling, I knew LJBF was inevitable. Igetit and sharkybear was spot on.

I realised after the whole thing that I was constantly seeking validation throughout our interactions in the past. That made me unattractive I assume. I could sense that interest was plummeting gradually. It actually started out pretty well. However due to her living an hour away(by flight) and we(or I) couldn't see each other as often as I wanted to, I developed this needy feeling. Perhaps if it wasn't some sort of LDR, I wouldn't have fallen into this validation nonsense.

Well I can't help but feel a bit down now but I am mentally prepared even before this. But I kind of respect her as she told me straight not to waste time and money flying in and out pursuing something which is unlikely to progress. I guess we all learn from this.

OK you all can start shooting me now...