How the hell do most mid to late 20s/early 30s men find dates???

[IKO69]

I'm pretty sure you know what the answer is deep down. If you don't know enough women within your social circle you are just going to have to overcome what you said most men have a genuine fear of, approaching women out in public. Now I don't mean literally going up to every woman that you see, but you need to put yourself firstly in situations that 1) have women, you need some sort of context in which to approach them, so a social event, 2) you need to try talking to the one's that have already decided that they wouldn't mind talking to bigdave17.

I wish it could be as simple as flipping a switch and they just suddenly came to you but that's not how it works. You are going to have to get your hands dirty. And stop denigrating "average" guys - let me break it to you, you are probably average yourself otherwise you wouldn't be making these same threads all the time. It's very tiring and what is your beef with other guys? Leave them the **** alone and worry about yourself.

 

[bigdave17]

I'm pretty sure you know what the answer is deep down. If you don't know enough women within your social circle you are just going to have to overcome what you said most men have a genuine fear of, approaching women out in public. Now I don't mean literally going up to every woman that you see, but you need to put yourself firstly in situations that 1) have women, you need some sort of context in which to approach them, so a social event, 2) you need to try talking to the one's that have already decided that they wouldn't mind talking to bigdave17.

I wish it could be as simple as flipping a switch and they just suddenly came to you but that's not how it works. You are going to have to get your hands dirty. And stop denigrating "average" guys - let me break it to you, you are probably average yourself otherwise you wouldn't be making these same threads all the time. It's very tiring and what is your beef with other guys? Leave them the **** alone and worry about yourself.

I'm not denigrating anybody. I'm just being honest - it's not a male or female issue either. Very small percentage of both genders really do a good job of maximizing their appearance. Most guys and girls both look like garbage.

I go to social events all the time and I mean ALL the time (bars, clubs, restaurants, concerts, sports events, festivals, etc...) but the issue is that approaching there is very difficult. Most women come with 2-6 friends and I don't feel comfortable approaching a group of 6 strangers

I've been ice cold recently in terms of getting attention from women or knowing who wants me to talk to them. I don't know why. I've never been leaner or better looking than I am right now. I've had my co workers recently comment on how lean and angular/chiseled my face is looking nowadays. I'm extremely thin nowadays for my standards (i'm naturally a thick, stocky guy so I'm trying to get to that happy medium of being slim like a model but still having the bigger muscles and thicker neck)

I keep thinking about doing online dating but I just don't look good in pictures compared to real life. It is sooooooooooooo frustrating. I'm like a totally maxed out 7.5 in real life but a 5 in pics

 

[zekko]

Social circle - I don't know how they do it. I've tried and tried and tried and tried and tried and I can't make any friends who know hot single women

You need to get invited to parties and social events, and then mingle. The approach isn't as "cold" in this case because you have common friends or acquaintances. If you can't talk to a girl in these situations, I don't know what to tell you.

Maybe if you weren't so quick to dismiss these women who like you but don't meet your 20 criteria, you could get to hang out in their social groups a bit. I know you're not interested in dating these women, but you could always friendzone them.

 

[IKO69]

I'm not denigrating anybody. I'm just being honest - it's not a male or female issue either. Very small percentage of both genders really do a good job of maximizing their appearance. Most guys and girls both look like garbage.

I go to social events all the time and I mean ALL the time (bars, clubs, restaurants, concerts, sports events, festivals, etc...) but the issue is that approaching there is very difficult. Most women come with 2-6 friends and I don't feel comfortable approaching a group of 6 strangers

I've been ice cold recently in terms of getting attention from women or knowing who wants me to talk to them. I don't know why. I've never been leaner or better looking than I am right now. I've had my co workers recently comment on how lean and angular/chiseled my face is looking nowadays. I'm extremely thin nowadays for my standards (i'm naturally a thick, stocky guy so I'm trying to get to that happy medium of being slim like a model but still having the bigger muscles and thicker neck)

I keep thinking about doing online dating but I just don't look good in pictures compared to real life. It is sooooooooooooo frustrating. I'm like a totally maxed out 7.5 in real life but a 5 in pics

Oh yes you do. You constantly make threads calling attention to "average guys" and have a mocking tone when you speak of them. You also then talk about how you are so much "superior" to them, yet, no results while average guys are out there doing the ****. I don't know what you look like so I won't criticize or make comments but you really need to leave other guys you don't know alone. Have you ever thought that maybe those guys are the women's type and have stuff going on and are FUN to be around? You always seem uptight and are critical of everything, especially other guys. It makes you look like an insecure chump.

We've already identified what the problem is - you are afraid to bite the bullet. As I said previously, you have to get your hands dirty. Yes, it's hard at first, no one is saying it isn't. Talking up a group of girls is a pretty daunting task; you gotta find openings and capitalize on them. I don't know what else to tell you man. I sort of have this feeling that the way you expect these interactions to go, you feel that women should just stop what they are doing and fawn over you at first sight as if you were Justin Timberlake or something. That is the reality for some men, not the majority of us. Let's stick with reality, not fantasy land.

 

[zekko]

I sort of have this feeling that the way you expect these interactions to go, you feel that women should just stop what they are doing and fawn over you at first sight as if you were Justin Timberlake or something.

That's it! That's exactly what I've always wanted, when it comes to females. Don't get it, but that's what I've always wanted!
I'm bringing sexy back...

 

[bigdave17]

I sort of have this feeling that the way you expect these interactions to go, you feel that women should just stop what they are doing and fawn over you at first sight as if you were Justin Timberlake or something. That is the reality for some men, not the majority of us. Let's stick with reality, not fantasy land.

I'll be honest

I feel like I should consistently have women who make it obvious they want me to approach them and they should be in my league (mid to late 20s, cute, nice body, no kids, decent job, classy, etc...). I've had a good amount of that (women making it obvious they want to be with me) in my lifetime but they've never been in my league

I don't get natural dating opportunities much anymore and it's very frustrating

my league would be someone who looks like this (beautiful Armenian girl)

 

[IKO69]

I'll be honest

I feel like I should consistently have women who make it obvious they want me to approach them and they should be in my league (mid to late 20s, cute, nice body, no kids, decent job, classy, etc...). I've had a good amount of that (women making it obvious they want to be with me) in my lifetime but they've never been in my league

I don't get natural dating opportunities much anymore and it's very frustrating

my league would be someone who looks like this (beautiful Armenian girl)

So go get her man. It's not beyond the realm of possibility.

 

[bigdave17]

So go get her man. It's not beyond the realm of possibility.

are you reading the thread at all?

That's hard to find period
When I do find that, they're never in a situation where approach is easy (always a million obstacles in the way). I'm not trying to make anybody feel uncomfortable.

This is something I really wonder about everyday. If I never moved from Armenia to here (I moved when I was 8), I would have found a beautiful wife by now because Armenian women are gorgeous and dating back there is not as retardedly difficult as it is here, but I would probably be poor. Instead, I'm very successful (make about 200K now) and have a perfect life overall except that I have zero dating life. What's worse you guys think?

 

[17 shots]

maybe you are too focused to scan who is better looking or in general looks. So you miss the signals women send you .

Yea stop checking out the other guys and keep your eyes on the women dave

 

[bigdave17]

Yea stop checking out the other guys and keep your eyes on the women dave

its just interesting to me to see how much I struggled in dating with how good I am in so many objective areas

its just frustrating

 

[Poonani Maker]

Join a very liberal church or cult. Eat with them. Liberal ones may have "parties" even the day before "church." I mean the ones that Worship Obama and such. I know it may make you sick, but do you wanna get laid or not? Desperate measures is what you do when the barbed wire is closing in on you.

 

[Poonani Maker]

If I never moved from Armenia to here (I moved when I was 8), I would have found a beautiful wife by now because Armenian women are gorgeous and dating back there is not as retardedly difficult as it is here, but I would probably be poor. Instead, I'm very successful (make about 200K now) and have a perfect life overall except that I have zero dating life.

Do you have dual citizenship? Why not take a plane trip or 2 Every year to Armenia to scoop up some poor lasses? 200K is a lot

 

[bigdave17]

Do you have dual citizenship? Why not take a plane trip or 2 Every year to Armenia to scoop up some poor lasses? 200K is a lot

i can't go back to Armenia because it's a mandatory military draft and i never served. I would love to meet an Armenian wife online but that's easier said than done.

yes my life outside of dating is unbelievably perfect. I buy and eat and do whatever I want with zero regard to budgeting. I have great friends and family. I'm healthy and attractive and athletic. I try to be very grateful everyday and not let my lack of dating success drive me insane because I have been very blessed and things have worked out astonishingly well.

 

[sazc]

Better than realty tv I tell you!

 

[spinich]

Delusion is always entertaining.