"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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How the hell did this guy get the girl (or did he)?

Balla_Baby_69

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So, I go to college and we just got here yesterday. I met this girl back at Admit Weekend in April and we hit it off and were making out by the econd night. Ever since then we have been keeping in contact (she's from LA and me from DC) and it seems she really likes me (trust me, I got all the signs)

Anyway, I see her yesterday and we seem to really hit it off. Flirting and stuff and she mentioned about our date (which we had planned a couple weeks before) and blah blah.

Ok, like a month ago I noticed this dude posting a lot of stuff on her facebook wall. I mean A LOT. He was saying how much he likes her and how perfect she is. He posted on her wall like 5 times in one day, no joke. All the stuff that the Bible says not to do.

Anyway, at around nighttime last night I could tell he really likes her (he goes to our school too and he's from LA) cus he kept walking around her and trying to flirt and ish. By the end of the night (we walked around a lot that night, it was a group of about 6 of us) they were holding hands for atleast a minute I saw. Earlier she had walked with her arm around me and my arm around her (she initialized it), also, so I'm like WTF?

Anyway, I acted like I didn't notice and it didn't phase me. I didn't go back there and try to compete I just kept myself preoccupied with other things/people, but it was messing me up inside because I have really gotten attached to this girl.

Also, she seemed kind of in a glum mood when they were walking like that together, like people are when they are deep in thought. Cus I heard him keep asking her if everything was OK and she said yes when it was obviously not.

Anyway, what the hell do I do in this situation. I have a serious ****blocker and I have no clue if she likes him back. Should I be coming on strong like he is or what?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Stag

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Hahaha, what a loser. Learn how to keep your woman. You have to walk like if anybody comes near her you will kick his ass.
 

Balla_Baby_69

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Yeah, but it had been like 4 months since I saw her. And he doesn't even know I like her like that...
 

The Bad Ass Canadian

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I'd say pull back and let her come to you.... this guy will blow it in a very short time, trust me. He's already half way there, or more.

Chill out, man.... it's no big deal, really. Stop getting attached for nothing.

Also, the fact that you just got back to college might be something to think about. Why would she want to rush into something with anyone, when she hasn't had time to weigh her options? You shjould have options, too.

is it really that complicated?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Balla_Baby_69

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Originally posted by The Bad Ass Canadian
I'd say pull back and let her come to you.... this guy will blow it in a very short time, trust me. He's already half way there, or more.

Chill out, man.... it's no big deal, really. Stop getting attached for nothing.

Also, the fact that you just got back to college might be something to think about. Why would she want to rush into something with anyone, when she hasn't had time to weigh her options? You shjould have options, too.

is it really that complicated?
Trust me, I really don't want to feel like this. I tell myself the SAME thing you just told me, but I can't help but feel the way I feel. I don't let it show for obvious reasons and I confide in certain friends.

I just can't help really liking this girl....she's great
 

The Nice Guy is Gone

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Originally posted by Balla_Baby_69
Trust me, I really don't want to feel like this. I tell myself the SAME thing you just told me, but I can't help but feel the way I feel. I don't let it show for obvious reasons and I confide in certain friends.

I just can't help really liking this girl....she's great
How old are you? You can help how you feel to an extent--I've done it.
 

The Bad Ass Canadian

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I understand how you're feeling. We've all been there, and we still get in these sittuations from time to time. You need to learn how to maintain a cool head, and not let this throw you off.

You really need to keep your emotions in check. Women are the ones driven by those. Not us.


Go after other goirls... believe me, there are tons more, and once you can get past certain things you'll relaise that they are pretty much all the same. Some are a bit cooler than others, but there's always a more fitting one right around the corner.

You've got oneitis and it's messing with you head.
 

The Nice Guy is Gone

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Okay, man, here goes.

You're 18 years old and whining like a f***ing baby. Either take her back, like they said (to pull away and let her come to you) or just next her.

You say you can't control your feelings; bull sh**; be a man and in control--yeah, I know it's hard sometimes, and sometimes you can't completely control how you feel, but you've seen this girl once, and now you're like, "Oooh, I can't help how I feel about her..." Yes, you can, and if you found another chic, that was kind of the same way she is, you'd forget all about this girl.

Grow some f***ing ba**s man, and either do somethign about it, or move on.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Balla_Baby_69

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Yeah, I know I got oneitis and there are prettier females, I just....

Besides, in the past the second one is always the charm. I don't know what it is about it, but usually girls come to me in pairs and the first one I start liking but then I don't feel her anymore and then the second one is the one that sticks around for a while.

But, ironically, Janea was actually number 2 cus I made out with this other girl first back in April, but Imma say she's #1 now....hope that's not connfusing, it has no significance, 'm just saying ****
 

Balla_Baby_69

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Originally posted by The Nice Guy is Gone
Okay, man, here goes.

You're 18 years old and whining like a f***ing baby. Either take her back, like they said (to pull away and let her come to you) or just next her.

You say you can't control your feelings; bull sh**; be a man and in control--yeah, I know it's hard sometimes, and sometimes you can't completely control how you feel, but you've seen this girl once, and now you're like, "Oooh, I can't help how I feel about her..." Yes, you can, and if you found another chic, that was kind of the same way she is, you'd forget all about this girl.

Grow some f***ing ba**s man, and either do somethign about it, or move on.
I am doing something about it. I already said I was gonna take the step back approach and I was just wondering if that is the right thing to do, considering this dude is doing just the opposite and he's the one holding her hand and not me
 

nishbuk

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Originally posted by Stag
Hahaha, what a loser. Learn how to keep your woman. You have to walk like if anybody comes near her you will kick his ass.
lol gj captain courage. You have to be joking...:rolleyes:
 
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