"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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How Soon to Workout After Soreness?

InvisibleMan

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Agreed about the healing process. But I've read that soreness is an indication that the microfibers in the individual muscles have torn and the recovery process is the time it takes for these tears to heal. And they heal back stronger and thicker, hence muscle growth.

Problem is mostly with the squats. I mean, I only did 3 sets of squats 5 days ago and my butt (glutes) are STILL sore from that. And this was only doing say 10 reps of 90 pounds. And I do stretching, get plenty of sleep, do cardio 30 min. a day and take protein.

There is much conflicting info on the net AND among physiological professionals abpout soreness. Some say if you are sore at all you are overtraining. Some bodybuilders say you gotta get sore or you aren't doing enough - you have to "shock" your body by doing exercises in a different way, higher weight, different workout order, all that to get sore. One guy told me that it's just a sign that you're "getting older." Screw that- I'm in better shape at 36 than when I was 18 - and I remember getting really sore in high school gym class. And, I just read an article by a professional bodybuilder that says he isn't happy with a squat workout unless he has trouble walking for the next 5 days!

Now that's too intense for me, but the question is do these guys wait 5 days for the soreness to completely dissipate, or do they just work through it? I had a conversation with a woman in the store where you buy supps and stuff and some pro trainers and they said pro bodybuilders live in a constant state of repair and breaking down. Does this mean they work through it? Does this mean that even though some muscle fibers in a particular muscle tear, they rest a day or two and go right back to tearing those same muscles? I asked them and THEY all got into an argument about it. LOL

So again, say you are quite sore in your glutes the day after, so you work your chest, day 3 comes along and I take a day off. Day 4 comes long and I rest again. It's day 5 - time to do glutes again but your butt is still sore from day 1? Do you work through it or not?

- Invisible Man
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Skilla_Staz

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I'd say no. I personally do not work that area if it's sore. For example, i did deadlifts one day. The next day my hamstrings were sore. So, I skipped my glute/ham raises that day.

I don't want to end up tearing or pulling something just because I'm eager to gain. I usually give about a weeks rest between each section too. Bench on Monday, Deads on Wednesday, Squats on Friday.
 

Warboss Alex

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InvisibleMan said:
Agreed about the healing process. But I've read that soreness is an indication that the microfibers in the individual muscles have torn and the recovery process is the time it takes for these tears to heal. And they heal back stronger and thicker, hence muscle growth

GO AND RIDE A BIKE FOR FOUR HOURS STRAIGHT. YOU WILL BE SORE.. BUT YOU SURE AS HELL WON'T GROW. SORENESS DOES NOT MEAN GROWTH. YES WORK OUT HEAVY AND YOU WILL BE SORE, BUT YOU CAN WORK OUT LIGHT (AND NOT CHALLENGE YOUR BODY TO CHANGE) AND ALSO BE SORE

Problem is mostly with the squats. I mean, I only did 3 sets of squats 5 days ago and my butt (glutes) are STILL sore from that. And this was only doing say 10 reps of 90 pounds. And I do stretching, get plenty of sleep, do cardio 30 min. a day and take protein.

3 x 10 IS HIGH VOLUME ESPECIALLY FOR SQUATS HENCE THE SORENESS. HOW DOES ONE STRETCH THE GLUTES??? LOL

There is much conflicting info on the net AND among physiological professionals abpout soreness. Some say if you are sore at all you are overtraining. Some bodybuilders say you gotta get sore or you aren't doing enough - you have to "shock" your body by doing exercises in a different way, higher weight, different workout order, all that to get sore. One guy told me that it's just a sign that you're "getting older." Screw that- I'm in better shape at 36 than when I was 18 - and I remember getting really sore in high school gym class. And, I just read an article by a professional bodybuilder that says he isn't happy with a squat workout unless he has trouble walking for the next 5 days!

THE AGE THING MIGHT BE AN ISSUE IF ONLY BECAUSE YOUR RECOVERY AND JOINTS HAVE SOME WEAR AND TEAR. IF YOU CAN'T WALK FOR FIVE DAYS AFTER THE SQUATS I WOULD HAVE TO QUESTION THE RECOVERY LEVELS OF SAID BBER. 1-2 DAYS OF INTENSE SORENESS IS FINE BUT ANY MORE THAN THAT MEANS SOMETHING'S NOT RIGHT

Now that's too intense for me, but the question is do these guys wait 5 days for the soreness to completely dissipate, or do they just work through it? I had a conversation with a woman in the store where you buy supps and stuff and some pro trainers and they said pro bodybuilders live in a constant state of repair and breaking down. Does this mean they work through it? Does this mean that even though some muscle fibers in a particular muscle tear, they rest a day or two and go right back to tearing those same muscles? I asked them and THEY all got into an argument about it. LOL

EVERYONE HAS A DIFFERENT OPINION. GO AND WORK OUT WHILST STILL SORE IN THE MUSCLE GROUP IN QUESTION AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS

So again, say you are quite sore in your glutes the day after, so you work your chest, day 3 comes along and I take a day off. Day 4 comes long and I rest again. It's day 5 - time to do glutes again but your butt is still sore from day 1? Do you work through it or not?

AS BEFORE IF IT'S STILL VERY SORE THEN SOMETHING IS WRONG. I PERSONALLY WOULD TAKE THE DAY OFF

- Invisible Man

...
 

Skilla_Staz

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WBA - Stretch your glutes by laying on your back and trying to pull your knee to your shoulders.
 

mrRuckus

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Why are you helping this guy after he's been a prick?

This is why people are pricks. There is no downside.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Skilla_Staz

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I'm doing it so other people who read this stuff aren't like "Maybe I should try this", and one way or another they become informed.
 
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