How soon is too soon?

[Dav Cole]

Hey there, Dav is back again. Class and rehersal has KILLED me timewise.

Anyway, I come to all you wise men with another situation.

I was with one of my lady friends today, nice little asian number by the name of Janice. Like Jamie, the two of us have been attracted to each other before, and always the other was with someone else (i seem to make that happen alot...-.-)

She and I were Drivin back from town when she suddenly broke down crying. I got concerned so I pulled over and asked her what was wrong.

Long story short, she and her Bf called it quits. Not exactly the most clean breakup either. So, she was crying and what not and I didmy best to calm her down and she asked me to take her back to her dorm. (One thing ive learned about this girl, when she says she wants to be alone, she means it!)

Anyway, backstory aside, this got me thinking...

How soon is too soon to move in on a gal?

How does one start a relationship with a girl, without being written off as "on the rebound" or as a person she went to in "Desperation"?

I seem to remember Doc Love being asked a question like this, but i cant seem to find that post anymore...

Anyway, im interested in any viewpoints on this. This isnt me asking for advice, this is just the curious wonderings of how you other Dj's handle these situations.

 

[Dav Cole]

bump

 

[So pimp its scary]

How soon is too soon?

I broke up with my last gf on New Years, and called the next broad 10 min later, and hit it that night.

How do you not appear as desperate?

Be a Man (plenty of posts on the one)

How do you not appear to be on the rebound?

Don't talk about your ex! - This is a Golden Rule, and should be avoided at all costs.

 

[Dav Cole]

no no no man. Not ME being off the rebound. HER writing it off as being on the rebound after SHE breaks up with a guy.

How soon do you move in on a gal whos just recently fell out of an LTR? THats the question.

Thanks for the response though!

 

[belividere]

I've never figured this out and I really put it up to the fact that everyone is different.

I've been the rebound guy 2 days, 2 months and even 2 years after a girl has broken up with her boyfriend. One thing that strikes me though is that if she is crying to you over what happened then you are in a bad prediciment. Regardless of when you make your move you were there for her during her pain. Not always a bad thing but something to remember as some girls view this as a good friend thing (i.e. emotional tampon) while some view it as a sensitive caring person. I wouldn't wait around to find out though because it may be longer than you think and that date may turn into her pouring her heart out about her life.

 

[wind20mph]

Its on the DJ Bible beleive me.

How soon is too soon? today after 1 minute.

One great Dating Coach that I have learned from. Have some spine... and get laid later. Cheers!

 

[quest]

firstly, what do you want from the relationship?

- is it really a problem if you're the rebound guy?

secondly, i don't actually think the guy makes himself the rebound guy. next time you are with her, and have an oppurtunity, make a move. if at anytime when you are with her, and she starts sulking and whining. tell her "stop crying. i'm here for a good time, not for my mood to be dragged down. lets go bowling!" - grab her hand and take her bowling. or something.

 

[So pimp its scary]

If that is the case... WHO CARES!

She either wants it or she doesn't... if she does then it doesn't matter how long ago her last relationship was, and if she doesn't then she will just use that as an excuse.

 

[Dav Cole]

Originally posted by So pimp its scary
If that is the case... WHO CARES!

She either wants it or she doesn't... if she does then it doesn't matter how long ago her last relationship was, and if she doesn't then she will just use that as an excuse.

Truer words were never spoken. The best ive heard it said!