How should I play this one?

[STR8UP]

Today I hit the mall to find some things for my new place. I went in one store to get some stuff for my bedroom, and a cute girl started helping me out. Seeing an opportunity, I tried to chat her up. She seemed very interested in helping me match colors and stuff so I asked her if she does interior designer on the side. Turns out, (much to my surprise) she is going to school for it.

I talked to her for probably 20 minutes about the things I am doing to my place, and I asked her a couple of times if she does the design thing on the side. She didn't really give me a straight answer, so as I was leaving I asked her one more time. She said, "No, I can''t do it because you have to have a license and I don't have one yet". I wanted to ask her if the design police would come and arrest her for picking curtains without a license, but instead I prodded her a little more in hopes that she might bite.

She finally asked me where I live, and when I told her she said, "I'll tell you what. I'll give you my email address and you can send me pictures of your place and I'll give you some advice." She writes down her email addy and asks for my name and my email. I thanked her and was on my way.

Throughout the time we were talking I could tell she was getting comfortable around me because she started talking to me like a friend instead of a customer, and had no problem with me getting into her personal space. She even made a comment on how a bachelor pad needs to be decorated right. Hmmm....I didn't tell her I was single....

So how should I play this one?

I really can use the design help. She says she doesn't want any money because it's "fun" for her. I appreciate any advice I can get on decorating my place, and she's pretty cute so I wouldn't mind giving her a few pointers on some other things, if you know what I mean!

 

[tmpgstx]

What you did was smooth - just like something i have done before. You created an oppurtunity for futher contact by using the design issue to your (and her) advantage.

Act like you're really clueless (which you probably) are about design. Keep asking her here and there her opinion on this or that with your pad. Get her chatting about herself and take it from there.

 

[JackPrescott]

If there is physical chemistry, and she isnt taken (or hell, even if she is and likes to walk on the wildside) she will inevitably either ask to see you on a social level (lunch, coffee, dinner, drinks, ect) or will be receptive to an invitation. If not, she was just a friendly salesperson.

 

[STR8UP]

I could sense at least a comfort level, if not a slight attraction from her, so although the premise of us communicating is that she is going to help me with my place, it should be easy to transition it to a social thing as well. If I am going to pursue whatever social contact with her I guess I just need to work it into the natural progression fo things. ALL women are constantly looking to make new friends, if nothing else.

 

[JackPrescott]

Originally posted by STR8UP
I could sense at least a comfort level, if not a slight attraction from her, so although the premise of us communicating is that she is going to help me with my place, it should be easy to transition it to a social thing as well. If I am going to pursue whatever social contact with her I guess I just need to work it into the natural progression fo things. ALL women are constantly looking to make new friends, if nothing else.

True, just be sure and get the "LJBF" bull$hit out of the way, as feasible as possible. No need in pursuing an uninterested woman.

 

[Lifeguard]

Hindsight is 20/20 but maybe in the future you could have made her qualify herself to you by busting her balls a little and saying:

"yeah...maybe you can recommend someone who is pretty experienced in design. Here's what I am looking to do...."

As you tell her what you like, she probably would have tried to qualify herself unless she really is just in retail sales and has no business designing at all.

Anyway, I wouldn't keep up this facade how you want her to help you decorate if you really want to just get in her pants. Kind of a wuss tactic which women are pretty keen on picking up, if she hasn't already.

Contacting her via email now is going backwards in the sarge. I wouldn't email her. Go back into her place of work in about a week. Don't be so pushy about getting her as a designer; that's why she was initially hesitant. Start over by building some attraction by teasing her a bit, some playful banter, if you sense some buying temp., shift to rapport and then close her to meet you for a drink when she gets off work.

~Lifeguard~

 

[TheMig]

How about getting some decent pics of your pad and seeing if shes interested in discussing them over lunch or some sort of coffee break? At least your getting more time in and gives you plenty of space since you have already established the inside track to her personal space. Now if you take her out of her nature ( hence outside her workplace) to a more neutral location ( coffee shop perhaps?) this way there won't be alarms going off in her and her guard is down while you use the pics to gain more inside word on her workings? All in all, you will be in a postion which you would be able to control the situation vs. her controling you in her workplace.....

seems like a simple way to me....any opinions?

 

[STR8UP]

Originally posted by TheMig
How about getting some decent pics of your pad and seeing if shes interested in discussing them over lunch or some sort of coffee break? At least your getting more time in and gives you plenty of space since you have already established the inside track to her personal space. Now if you take her out of her nature ( hence outside her workplace) to a more neutral location ( coffee shop perhaps?) this way there won't be alarms going off in her and her guard is down while you use the pics to gain more inside word on her workings? All in all, you will be in a postion which you would be able to control the situation vs. her controling you in her workplace.....

seems like a simple way to me....any opinions?

Good idea. Too bad though.....I emailed her yesterday and no response as of yet so it might be a dead deal. If I get a response I'll try what you suggested.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Cut it off with no response to her email. I agree that emailing is going in reverse in the sarge. You need face time - go back in in a week, only plan it strategically and see if you can get inot the place an hour or two prior to the store closing. Try the 'insta-date' routine and work it from the "spontaneous" date idea. You need to isolate her, she wont be as responsive in her work setting.