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How should I bring up to my GF that I don't like the thirst trap pics she posts on Snapchat

stringpuller

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Respectfully...I realize Rollo is a popular manosphere figure, but I'd recommend Jack Donovan's 'Way of Men', as a first book on masculinity. Some will object that Donovan is gay, but his sexuality figures nowhere into his writing, and the objection is rather like pointing out that Hemmingway blew his own brains out; it's irrelevant to either man's writing.

Donovan approaches masculinity, on its own, independent of women, and from an anthropological(first principles) perspective. This is important, because I believe the primary problem most modern men have with women is that they don't spend enough time alone with other men, doing masculine things(building, hunting, exploring, fighting, inventing). Being the default male among a group of females doesn't make a man the prize bull; he might just as well be the harem eunuch.

If men will develop healthier masculine relationships, they'll be less likely to eagerly accept being simps and cucks.
Just had a convo with a guy here about mens abilities to rationalize red flags away. Its like its in the water or something.
Im sure there are other resources its just RM just resonated with me. And of course pook. For women.
But as you said just focusing on the masculine part my be great for some readers.
 

ShePays

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Just had a convo with a guy here about mens abilities to rationalize red flags away. Its like its in the water or something.
Im sure there are other resources its just RM just resonated with me. And of course pook. For women.
But as you said just focusing on the masculine part my be great for some readers.
I think the problem is that too many men focus on how to work their way up from harem eunuch to prize bull, which places all of their self-worth in the hands of women, regardless of their respective ends of the spectrum. What they fail to acknowledge is that, anthropologically, a man's value to women is determined, first, by his value to other men. A man whose value is determined entirely by his value to women, independently, is a kept man, regardless of how highly he's prized by them.
 

AwlaysFukedUp

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Like why the f*** would she text me last night saying hey during this partying, then totally not respond at all after? And I still haven't heard anything from her.
 

ShePays

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Like why the f*** would she text me last night saying hey during this partying, then totally not respond at all after? And I still haven't heard anything from her.
Call a single male friend, and go do something productive, and block that biitch's number, and then delete it. This ain't rocket surgery.
 

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Focal core

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Or maybe if she values him enough she will conform herself to him. But I could definitely be wrong, I don't know this girl or him. Women will change themselves for you if they value you enough. They'll do it quickly too.
Particularly true, a women 100% into you will come with respect toward her man.
 

mrgoodstuff

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By mirroring the guy personallity, she could be well experienced enought guessing their guy liking and preferences.
Is it always people they like. I've seen a lady mirror alot of the actions of a guy in a group. She wanted to be part of the group. He was the loudest Talker.
 

CBear

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Well this is f*cking unbelievable.
How is it unbelievable when everyone here was telling you that this is bad news from experience? This is what happens to guys who try to rationalize that everything is fine or that things are different. Sleepless nights for them while everyone else saw it from a mile away.
Like why the f*** would she text me last night saying hey during this partying, then totally not respond at all after? And I still haven't heard anything from her.
Cause she's playing you and you don't have enough self respect to take action due to wanting a relationship. It's only gonna get more frustrating with more headaches should you choose to deal with this for some reason.
 

Focal core

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She would matrix transform to whichever group she interface with. She wanted to be liked and did things that are way out of character. I could see she was good at playing "roles".
They type of person that you cant trust, she will flip out once better deal comes along.
 

dk1990S111

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Just be done with her. Don’t let her talk her way out of this bs. If things were reversed and she was at home being a good little gf and you were out hanging out with chicks getting drunk how would she react? She’d move on.

Best advice as others have said is don’t even give her the satisfaction of a dramatic reaction about last night. She will eat it up and you’ll be replaced by the end of the weekend. Just be done. She’s a waste of your time.
 

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oldmanofthesea

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Unfortunately, I can tell by how distraught OP is by this, and by how he is waiting by the phone to hear back from her despite her behavior and disrespect to him, that he isn’t going to follow our advice, and as a result, will be further stripped of his pride and suffer further agony from this girl. At this point I would advise OP to figure out the source of his lack of self-respect that causes him to remain this attached to someone who disrespects him so badly. His natural reaction to her actions should not be fear, jealousy, anxiety, frustration, and loss, but rather disgust, disinterest, and detachment.

OP I can tell you are not really reading and listening to the advice you are being given here. Usually that's because you want reality to be something other than it really is and you aren't yet ready to accept reality. The wisdom and advice you've been given will be here for you when you are ready. Read back through the postings when you are ready and able to take it all in.
 
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mrgoodstuff

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Unfortunately, I can tell by how distraught OP is by this, and by how he is waiting by the phone to hear back from her despite her behavior and disrespect to him, that he isn’t going to follow our advice, and as a result, will be further stripped of his pride and suffer further agony from this girl. At this point I would advise OP to figure out the source of his lack of self-respect that causes him to remain this attached to someone who disrespects him so badly. His natural reaction to her actions should not be fear, jealousy, anxiety, frustration, and loss, but rather disgust, disinterest, and detachment.
He's in a common position for a man without abundance. There are powerful actions that can be taken to elevate yourself at this point. Focus on your purpose. Deprioritizing or removing the entity thats causing you disrespect yourself.

Being in this point means your low on self respect. And your cheating yourself. When you should be treating yourself. You should've been at that party with her. She sent the pics to condition you.
 
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AttackFormation

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This situation and latest developments reminds me of the boyfriends of a girl I hung out with in gymnasium.

She would pick weak and codependent boyfriends (which was obvious to me even then), then basically live as if she was single. Walked in on her riding some guy one time after we'd been at her boyfriend's place earlier, where iirc he snivelled over her going out without him. She left him there and hooked up with that guy.

Even at the time I could tell she didn't respect her boyfriends, and why (weakness, codependence), though it was years before I found SS. But bizarrely, that is also why she picked them. OP will remain like that too until he is traumatized enough to change, if he ever does. Only then could all this advice suddenly kick in.

I also decided that it's equally obvious how a woman like that isn't suitable for a healthy relationship.
 
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She's randomly posted mirror selfie "look at my ass" thirst trap-esque pics (once every week or two) ever since I've known her, which was fine early on since she was single, but now we're exclusive and she's still doing it just as much or more than ever. And this week she's really going for it...

Wednesday night she posted an ass selfie in short shorts with the caption "bed time", and last night she posted a video of herself swinging around on her pole dancing pole with the song "crazy *****" playing in the background and wearing short shorts that she had rolled up further, so her ass cheeks were hanging out (they were rolled up enough so that about half her ass was showing).

I don't care if she takes pics/vids like this, but it bothers me that she's sharing them publicly--especially on snapchat. First of all, it makes me think she might secretly be very insecure and requires constant attention from random people, including random people of the opposite sex, for validation. And more importantly, I'm sure she has other guys on her friends list who see these vids. And being a guy I know how guys think and what they'll try to do when they see this stuff. What bothers me the most is that she's deliberately showing herself in a sexual manner publicly on snapchat and is putting herself in a position where she'll get hit on by other guys when she's already committed to me.

I really, REALLY like this girl, we have a ton of real emotional and personality chemistry that I've only ever felt a couple other times in my decade+ of dating, and I want to make this work, but I don't know what to make of this. I'm not sure how to bring this up in a non-combative way.
The issue is not her behaviour.

It is your response to her behaviour.

1) It is part of female nature to want male attention. Technology merely magnifies that psychological button.

2) Even if you yelled and freaked out at her about it all your guarenteeing is that she'll hide the behaviour. not that she'll change it.

cheers
 
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