How should I ask this girl out after we've had a few dates/kissed?

[Vice]

So there's a girl who I went to prom with, kissed a few times, went on a few dates, all of that.

I've decided to get into a relationship with her, and I need help figuring out a way to ask her to be my girlfriend.

I checked the DJ Bible and it doesn't say anything about this.

The reason I've been postponing asking her out is because I never realized how interested I was until my 'friend' started talking to her and suggesting that they hang out, which she agreed. Then I started feeling like I could lose her and all of that BS.

I'm planning on doing it today if we meet up, because I told her that I had something to tell her and that it was important (to pique her interest and make her wonder what I want to tell her). We'll be in person and I'll ask her out right there. I just don't quite know what to say. I want to go through the trouble of seeing her in person because asking her out over the phone/myspace/text/IM is really lame.

A quick, helpful response would be a good one. Thank you

 

[Max Power]

I never realized how interested I was until my 'friend' started talking to her and suggesting that they hang out, which she agreed. Then I started feeling like I could lose her and all of that BS.

I actually don't think you should ask her to be in a relationship because it seems like you're starting this thing because of insecurity.

 

[ARrocket]

I actually don't think you should ask her to be in a relationship because it seems like you're starting this thing because of insecurity.

I'd agree with that....make sure you REALLY like her.

But, I'm kinda in the same situation...how do you go about stepping up the relationship?? There aren't really any good threads on the subject...and it's SO much different in the high school world.

 

[BeyondCharm]

If you're in highschool, this thread belongs in the highschool forum.

 

[Teh_Wolf]

i heard that you shouldnt actually ask her out 'to be your gf'. it should kinda eventually become understood the way you act and stuff that people assume your together and she will too. like to where you can just intro her as your gf or she just intro's you as her bf ect.

just something i heard

 

[Max Power]

Normally, I'd say you're not in a relationship until you're ****ing but OP is 17 and I don't know how old the girl is.

I see he wants to set boundaries with this chick so she doesn't end up screwing around with his friends. However, I'm not a fan of making "We're in a relationship" declarations.

I think the advice he really needs is how to get this girl he likes to stop hanging out with his friends.

 

[ARrocket]

i heard that you shouldnt actually ask her out 'to be your gf'. it should kinda eventually become understood the way you act and stuff that people assume your together and she will too. like to where you can just intro her as your gf or she just intro's you as her bf ect.

just something i heard

I've heard this as well...but will it actually play out that way? I distinctly remember a post about some guy who kept losing girls because he didn't announce his intentions for a committed relationship.

As for the OP, I would suggest not asking her to be your gf, but to ask her out on more and more dates and spend more time with her (without being needy of course).

 

[Teh_Wolf]

im interested in this now aswell Im also possibly going to try to move things forward with this one girl

 

[Vice]

I think the advice he really needs is how to get this girl he likes to stop hanging out with his friends.

That would actually be REALLY helpful.

I've heard this as well...but will it actually play out that way? I distinctly remember a post about some guy who kept losing girls because he didn't announce his intentions for a committed relationship.

As for the OP, I would suggest not asking her to be your gf, but to ask her out on more and more dates and spend more time with her (without being needy of course).

I might end up like that guy soon. I hope not. And me and her have already gone on lots of dates and spent quite some time together, I even took her to prom.

 

[LostAndConfused]

Well most people say the GIRL is supposed to ask YOU to be exclusive with her in a relationship, but we all know alot of girls are shy and even if they are really comfortable with you, they won't initiate that.

 

[Max Power]

Vice.

Why don't you tell your friends to stop hanging out with your chick?

 

[ARrocket]

Well most people say the GIRL is supposed to ask YOU to be exclusive with her in a relationship, but we all know alot of girls are shy and even if they are really comfortable with you, they won't initiate that.

Obviously, this a problem that a lot of us face....damn now I'm super interested in this thread lol.

And I don't think you can just tell your friends to stop hanging around her...what about guys that aren't you friends? Obviously, other guys will flirt with her, and may even ask her out.

 

[BeyondCharm]

A girl does not straight up need to "Ask you" to be in a relationship. She needs to simply be giving you clear signs that she wants to be your girl exclusively and her interest level must warrant it. It tends to be wise to wait until after you've had sex to make this kind of commitment and you must remember that YOU ARE THE PRIZE THAT SHE IS TRYING TO WIN OVER, YOU DECIDE IF YOU WANT TO SLEEP WITH HER AND YOU DECIDE IF YOU WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH HER.

 

[ARrocket]

A girl does not straight up need to "Ask you" to be in a relationship. She needs to simply be giving you clear signs that she wants to be your girl exclusively and her interest level must warrant it. It tends to be wise to wait until after you've had sex to make this kind of commitment and you must remember that YOU ARE THE PRIZE THAT SHE IS TRYING TO WIN OVER, YOU DECIDE IF YOU WANT TO SLEEP WITH HER AND YOU DECIDE IF YOU WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH HER.

This makes sense, but you have to understand that high school is like a completely different world. The girls are usually much less experienced, and often-times sex doesn't come into the equation at all for awhile...and what's worse, these girls are surrounded buy guys for 8+ hours a day. There are SO many for them to choose from right in front of their faces.

 

[BeyondCharm]

This makes sense, but you have to understand that high school is like a completely different world. The girls are usually much less experienced, and often-times sex doesn't come into the equation at all for awhile...and what's worse, these girls are surrounded buy guys for 8+ hours a day. There are SO many for them to choose from right in front of their faces.

So this belongs in the high school forum doesn't it. And a second note is that you had mine as well start being a DJ right now and stop using highschool an the excuse. And if it works differently, why not ask all your friends who have girlfriends how it worked for them?

 

[positivity_injection]

if you dont even know HOW to ask her out, then you dont deserve her (or any other girl) as your gf......your life will be ruined because you dont know how to handle a relationship, so its better that you stay single....im serious, you'll be depressed when she dumps you because you cant handle your business like a man (even though you are only 17)

with that tough love said, you either man up and STOP ANALYZING this bs, and just ask her out, any goddamn way you want

or

just dont ask her

 

[Teh_Wolf]

I feel the positivity flowing through my veins

 

[positivity_injection]

I feel the positivity flowing through my veins

you're funny

but im still 100% correct here

 

[Faded Image]

if you dont even know HOW to ask her out, then you dont deserve her (or any other girl) as your gf......your life will be ruined because you dont know how to handle a relationship, so its better that you stay single....im serious, you'll be depressed when she dumps you because you cant handle your business like a man (even though you are only 17)

with that tough love said, you either man up and STOP ANALYZING this bs, and just ask her out, any goddamn way you want

or

just dont ask her

Why don't you offer some words of wisdom to help him accomplish his mission instead of smashing him into the ground.

 

[Squiggly Sponge]

You're a young guy at 17, so much to learn and luckily a lot of time. Better to go for it and learn from experience than take advice at this stage - especially when you're dealing with inexperienced girls, who will be much more "forgiving".

I suggest (LOL advice) asking her out and seeing how it goes... it's all a learning curve.

Good luck