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How rare is large age gap dating?

HaleyBaron

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I am just saying for grown up men to be targeting 18 year olds is bordering on jailbait. Girls that age have very little to offer men in their 30s intellectually.

Where have I seen that line before...



I look at my daughter now and I know what lies ahead. Long before she is 16 and thus, in the eyes of the law, “legal”, she’ll be leered at on the bus and chatted up by men five, 10, perhaps even 15 years her senior.

Post-puberty, her school uniform will prompt heckling from louts in vans. It won’t stop once she is “of age” either, though I can only pray that this will be the extent of her dealings with creeps who are old enough to know better.

It’s only when we are older that we begin to understand these exchanges between young girls and older men, the power play at the heart of them and the damage that can be done. This is why the responsibility lies with the older party: the man looking at the luminous flesh of a teenager and wondering if he or she is worth the risk.


But what about the old days, when David Bowie was deflowering Lori Maddox, one of the so-called “baby groupies” of the era? The law didn’t sanction that. Since Bowie’s death last month, commentators have asked whether we should be celebrating a man known to have had sex with a minor, and whether it’s possible to separate the art from the artist. Bowie wasn’t alone, of course. Iggy Pop, Jimmy Page, Steven Tyler, Jerry Lee Lewis – they were all at it.

Those were different times, we are told; to a point, it’s true. Those where the days when few were familiar with the word paedophilia, and when the repercussions on a young girl of sleeping with an older man were not much considered, because the welfare of young girls wasn’t considered at all. Those were the days when men joked about bedding teenagers and the concept of consent was rarely discussed.
When I said Fruitbat sounds like an old woman, I really meant it.

 

Fruitbat

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I am just saying for grown up men to be targeting 18 year olds is bordering on jailbait. Girls that age have very little to offer men in their 30s intellectually.

Where have I seen that line before...





When I said Fruitbat sounds like an old woman, I really meant it.

You really want that rise don’t you my cupcake?

you’ll have to get your supply somewhere else I’m afraid

Quite lol someone calling themselves Haley is accusing others of being women :)
 

Fruitbat

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I am just saying for grown up men to be targeting 18 year olds is bordering on jailbait. Girls that age have very little to offer men in their 30s intellectually.

Where have I seen that line before...





When I said Fruitbat sounds like an old woman, I really meant it.

I just read that and actually, I agree. Girls in school uniforms shouldn’t be leered at on a bus.


I look at my daughter now and I know what lies ahead. Long before she is 16 and thus, in the eyes of the law, “legal”, she’ll be leered at on the bus and chatted up by men five, 10, perhaps even 15 years her senior.

Post-puberty, her school uniform will prompt heckling from louts in vans.”

What part of that do you disagree with?
You’re cool with that?
 

shwami_salami

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Depends on the person doesn’t it? If the 18 year old is off to Harvard or Oxford I’d probably go with that. If the 30 year old is a PUA blowhard then probably not.

I’d also be thinking “why is this guy going after what was only a short while ago a child? Why doesn’t he want a 25 y old with a job and a compatible lifestyle?”

my wife is 11 years younger than me so I am a big advocate for an age gap.

I am just saying for grown up men to be targeting 18 year olds is bordering on jailbait. Girls that age have very little to offer men in their 30s intellectually. A lot are still going to the movies and listening to boy bands etc. 25 perhaps. Have you met any recently? There is a massive difference between say 25 and 40 and 18 and 30.

it’s not so much the age gap itself, it’s that 18 on one end is really young.

a 30 yo with an 18 yo looks ridiculous.

At 21 I had a 17 yo GF (legal here) and that was too big an age gap. I felt pretty embarrassed about it.
But why doesnt society shame creepy older women as well? Ive had my fair experiences. when I was 14 w/a 20 yr old and other incidents. Yte we get told to man up nd tolerate these hags who pray on young guys
 

Billtx49

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But why doesnt society shame creepy older women as well? Ive had my fair experiences. when I was 14 w/a 20 yr old and other incidents. Yte we get told to man up nd tolerate these hags who pray on young guys
One of the most notable in my recent memory was Mary Kay Letourneau …
She got some prison time for rape of a child while under her elementary school teaching care …
The legal system tried to cut her some slack along the way because she was female, but she just couldn’t stop banging the 6th grader and went to the big house …
 

Fruitbat

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But why doesnt society shame creepy older women as well? Ive had my fair experiences. when I was 14 w/a 20 yr old and other incidents. Yte we get told to man up nd tolerate these hags who pray on young guys
I think it does to a certain extent. That’s a criminal offence. Also it’s not nearly as common.

If not, it should.
 

SW15

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If a man wants to date 10+ years younger, he needs a big salary. Physical fitness will always help, but a 40 year old fit man trying to date a 25 year old without money isn't that strong of a proposition. She can date other 25-27 year old fit guys.

Without money and muscles, you're options are going to women close to your own age. For men 35-50, that includes a lot of single moms and childless careerists.
 

HaleyBaron

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Without money and muscles, you're options are going to women close to your own age.
I would argue it's even worse for older guys cause women have similar income to other middle class men and families. Older women in careers tend to enter management positions, and let me tell you, women in authority roles destroys everything female about them. So that's also hurting the older men who have to settle unless they want some trash woman from a rural area or poor area.
 

SW15

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Without money and muscles, you're options are going to be women close to your own age.
I would argue it's even worse for older guys cause women have similar income to other middle class men and families. Older women in careers tend to enter management positions, and let me tell you, women in authority roles destroys everything female about them. So that's also hurting the older men who have to settle unless they want some trash woman from a rural area or poor area.
When women evaluate a man 35+, they consider his muscles less than his money.

If a 35-50 year old man is dating 35-50 year old childless women, you're correct that those women are likely careerists in middle or upper management positions, or are doctors/dentists/lawyers. 35-50 year old childless business managers/executives, doctors/dentists, and lawyers are all tough women to date and you're correct that their femininity is diminished due to their working roles.
 

Fortune_favors_the_bold

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I would say that we should consider the woman and the men a separate now, let me explain.

-At 20 a girl consider anyone above 25 to be old, at 25 she can go as high as early 30s generally, after 27 she can go as high as late 30s/early 40s if the man has his S together while a woman 30+ is generally open to older guys as long as they are of a decent stock.

-Regarding us men, it's mandatory to be in shape regardless your age and the girl one, the better your shape the easier it comes.
Usually younger girls appreciate a ripped well proportioned physique even if not massive while in my opinion the big masculine swollen type works better on 25+ women, same thing with beards.

Now and older man 35+ that wants to score younger pretty girls needs not only to be minimun a 7 in L but more important needs to have a life style that is adventurous, social and particular and needs to have enough money to be able to involve the girl or many of them in that.

It really helps if in his life he is involved with younger people, that destroys a lot of barrier when it comes of younger girls deciding to be involved with him, think of preselection by affiliation.

A night club owner definitely scores more than a top bank manager even given the same looks and money.
 

Mazer

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It's somewhat rare. It's difficult to get a woman 10 or more years younger for men in their 30s-40s. A 30s-40s man needs to be either incredibly wealthy, have big muscles, or have amazing charisma to get that done. Men who are able to achieve big age gaps usually do it due to money more than the other two ways.




Fun is only one angle that a man can use to attract women. There are other ones. Money is a common used one.

At 30, it'd be disappointing to attract 35-45 year old "aunties". While 22 year olds would be awesome, I think you want someone who at least younger. You'd probably be ok with a 27-28 year old.
I’m 45 yrs old and have dated as young as nineteen. I don’t have a lot of money, muscles aren’t that big, charisma is okay. I do have a “presence” when I walk into a room from what I’ve been told. I also have the look that women find attractive these days which is the biggest factor. It’s similar to how most guys find the Kim Kardashian look attractive and gravitate towards those women.
 

patb

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I’m 45 yrs old and have dated as young as nineteen. I don’t have a lot of money, muscles aren’t that big, charisma is okay. I do have a “presence” when I walk into a room from what I’ve been told. I also have the look that women find attractive these days which is the biggest factor. It’s similar to how most guys find the Kim Kardashian look attractive and gravitate towards those women.
Yeah, the pessimism on age gaps doesn’t fit my experience (and I’m very pessimistic in general). Many of the last several chicks have been early twenties or even late teens. Oldest 27
 

oc16

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I know quite a few couples who have an 8 to 14 year age gap.

Over 15 years, honestly, I don't see it very often at all.
 

Stanley

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I would say that we should consider the woman and the men a separate now, let me explain.
-At 20 a girl consider anyone above 25 to be old, at 25 she can go as high as early 30s generally, after 27 she can go as high as late 30s/early 40s if the man has his S together while a woman 30+ is generally open to older guys as long as they are of a decent stock.
Anecdotal, but this hasn't been my experience and I am close to 26.

Most of my matches on dating apps were 19-22 and not one of em thought of me as 'old'. The two girls I was recently seeing were 20 and 21 respectively and age never came up a single time. I think part of it isn't age, but how attractive you are. The more attractive the 'younger' you may appear to someone and the less they care about other things. Especially with young women. That said I do look more youthful then most guys my age, but I certainly don't look like a boy. Statistically women on average want a man a few years older so it makes sense, although we see the trend inversely around the time the woman passes her mid 30s and wants a younger guy oftentimes.

Otherwise I agree with everything else in your post.
 

Stanley

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Also, i found this website which really showcases some interesting trends and reinforces that women want older and men want younger among other things. Totally worth a look and lot's to take away. Backed up by a plethora of studies
 
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