"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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How often to Kick it?

Weezy

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Situation.....

Been working on this one for around 2.5 months.
Things are going good... but she leaves 90% of the contact up to me.
Like this one too much. Have to fight off AFC Oneitis tendencies.

Normally, the girl starts to contact me more than I do her at this phase, or ask for a relationship. I know she's not seeing anyone else, and I'm not either. Sex is awesome. This chick is super chill though and isn't overly expressive with her emotions and doesn't push for any commitment.

I've basically been hitting her up twice a week for kick it sessions via text. Not a lot of casual texting going on, pretty much every time I do, it's to hang out, and she's always down or gives an immediate counter if she already has plans. Has introduced me to her work crew, best friends and her siblings thus far (no mom and dad yet)

The question is how often to kick it / how often to text?

Any danger of her getting sick of only kicking it 2x per week or am I over-thinking?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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runner83

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Weezy said:
I know she's not seeing anyone else, and I'm not either. Sex is awesome. This chick is super chill though and isn't overly expressive with her emotions and doesn't push for any commitment.
Yes you are over thinking. It's up to you but if you want to keep it at the fb level (?), 2 times a week is the max.

Likelihood is that she is banging another guy as well. And her lack of emotions and no push for commitment means that you are just the guy on side.

Despite what she says about not seeing anyone else, I recommend seeing other chicks as well.
 

Weezy

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Her best friend was all drunk last weekend telling me how much she likes me and how I need to treat her good cause her last BF was a jerk...

So for argument sake, assume she's not dating anyone else. Do I try and hang out more often, or just keep at 2x per week until she says something?
 

shyguy32

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This is all up to you!! We're not here to tell you how to handle this chick, you're the only one that knows how you feel or how she feels! So go with what your gut tells you!

But it's obvious that she's thinking you two are more than you're thinking you are.

"Her last BF treated her like a jerk" means that she thinks your bf/gf IMO.
 

Bluntmaster

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runner83 said:
Yes you are over thinking. It's up to you but if you want to keep it at the fb level (?), 2 times a week is the max.

Likelihood is that she is banging another guy as well. And her lack of emotions and no push for commitment means that you are just the guy on side.

Despite what she says about not seeing anyone else, I recommend seeing other chicks as well.

Chics have game these days too. They aren't dumb so just because she isn't acting clingy doesn't mean there is someone else.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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L B

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Keep it at 2 times a week for the time being and enjoy the "kick it" time with her without the demands of a relationship. If she likes you, she will express her desire your commitment in a relationship in due time.
 

5string

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You are over thinking this

Does not seem to be a problem here imo

You may be a plate she is spinning. You'll find out soon enough.

Advice...don't give her too much attention/adoration even if you step it up to more than 2X per week. And like the guys say on here say, make her "prove" she's worthy. In the meantime, sleep with one eye open.
 

scrouds

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I'm going to go on a limb here. You want her to get all gushy and emo over you. You're craving that deep down inside.

I agree with the other posters, leave a good situation alone, but if you really want it, pull away, 1x a week, maybe none for a week, and let her start chasing.
 

scorpio1138

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I have experience with this situation you're in.

what worked best for my situation, was to leave the calling/texting up to her. In my case, she wouldn't go 2 full weeks without contacting me.

It went on that way for a full year and she never asked me why I didn't initiate contact ever. maybe my girl was just dumb. I dunno.

What I do know is that there were times she would say things like mentioning moving in together and being more serious, but then she would change her position and clarify we are best friends with the benefits. This went on and on for a year and had me second guessing often.

I know she was getting it from others as I heard it from her friend, but it didn't matter to me as long as I didn't witness it first hand.

Thats part of the FB situation.

Don't press her for exclusivity, thats for her to do.

my 002 cents
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Weezy

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Thanks for the advice.

Gonna keep with the 2x per week and just keep my emotions in check.

As long as I keep getting to sex her up and have fun.. No reason to pull back on the reigns.
 

scorpio1138

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Weezy said:
Thanks for the advice.

Gonna keep with the 2x per week and just keep my emotions in check.

As long as I keep getting to sex her up and have fun.. No reason to pull back on the reigns.

yeah keep having your fun. I almost pulled back a year ago but I didn't. I ended up getting countless more lays from her all of last year.
 
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