How often/soon to contact a ONS for potential FB or FWB

[gravityeyelids]

ok so i went out friday, partied with my buddy and his girlfriend's friends. There was a HB8.5 and HB7.5, both roommates. I met the HB8.5 first, flirted a bit right off the bat, took shots with her while we were pregaming. Giving me IOI's, thought i had a good chance. Go to the party and i go off, be social, meeting girls and people. Come back a couple times, try making some moves on the HB8.5...while i can tell she's attracted...she was kind of a b!tch and not really having it. I wasnt trying real hard because i really didnt care.

So i gave up on her and went after other girls. Big party, cant even move. For whatever i failed to notice her roommate HB7.5 was actually pretty cute (i dig facial piercings). Was pretty drunk, dont remember everything, but i think i was making out with her at the party, we all go back to their place, i keep flirting with HB7.5, kissing her, whatever. I know it's on. It's real late, my buddy is about to give me a ride home. I tell the girl "i've gotta go now. You should come back with me, and i'll give you a ride home in the morning. Or you can stay here. Your call, i'm going now though."

She agrees, and we go back to my place. Fool around, have sex. I hadn't fapped all week from going no fap, so i didnt last long at all. Didnt bother me, i think i told her a stopped masturbating, and i knew i'd bang her in the morning. She gave good head, which is a godsend, because my last girl was not very good at it and didn't seem to like doing it. This girl i could tell did, which is a fantastic quality in a FB. Woke up, gave it to her good, took her home.

My question is.. this girl isn't relationship material...she's cool and all, not hot but cute, and i'd like to keep banging her and not much else. How often should i hit her up to hangout (aka sexytime) and how soon? Haha i'm horny but i dont wanna hit her up too soon. Can anyone give me guidelines for getting/keeping a girl strictly as a f*&& buddy? I dont wanna risk her having feelings for me or getting attached. The last friends with benefits situation ended up with me in a 6 month LTR, because i was hooking up with her for like the 5 months prior to us becoming exclusive, and i was making sure there werent girls i liked better than her..didnt find any and felt bad for stringing her along.

Problem is...while i can stay emotionally disconnected, i enjoy cuddling and sleeping with a girl. However this is obviously dangerous territory if i'm just trying to be FB's with her. Advice DJs? Also, what's the diff b/w friends w/ benefits and a fvckbuddy?

 

[hockeyfreak79]

I believe Peaks&Valley had a great thread on this, search for it!

I see my FB maybe 1x a week, ocassionally we grab a beer but most of the time we just get right down to business. No excessive text or talking on the phone, that just sends the wrong message.
Time, place & go at it. Typically, I'd say we mostly hook-up during the week. Every once in awhile a weekend nite.

Broads just like the term friends with benefits better I guess, I don't think there's a difference really. I have hungout with her & her friends once maybe 2x.But @ the time we both made it clear it wasn't a date.

Like you said she isn't relationship material, don't try dating her. I'd give it 4 or 5 days & just hit her up.

No cuddling fvck buddies! She was horny & she might have just wanted an ONS who knows. You have nothing to lose really. Oh about.com has a good outline for FB too, more or less good guidelines for casual sex.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

I believe Peaks&Valley had a great thread on this, search for it!

I see my FB maybe 1x a week, ocassionally we grab a beer but most of the time we just get right down to business. No excessive text or talking on the phone, that just sends the wrong message.
Time, place & go at it. Typically, I'd say we mostly hook-up during the week. Every once in awhile a weekend nite.

Broads just like the term friends with benefits better I guess, I don't think there's a difference really. I have hungout with her & her friends once maybe 2x.But @ the time we both made it clear it wasn't a date.

Like you said she isn't relationship material, don't try dating her. I'd give it 4 or 5 days & just hit her up.

No cuddling fvck buddies! She was horny & she might have just wanted an ONS who knows. You have nothing to lose really. Oh about.com has a good outline for FB too, more or less good guidelines for casual sex.

I agree 100%. And thanks bro!

Definitely give it a few days, I think the key to a long lasting FB relationship is that both of you need to have other options, or at least seem like you have other options. Otherwise, one of you may try to turn it into something more than it is. She doesn't want a FWB getting attached to her. So in that sense, you have to establish your un-neediness right off the bat. Basically, that you don't care either way, but if she wants to come "hang out" with you, then cool. Otherwise, no big deal.

It was a ONS, a drunken one at that, so who knows how it's going to work when both of you are more or less sober. I would text her sometime this week, like hockeyfreak said. Guage by her responses, and invite her over. At the beginning you may need to give the movie excuse, or bring up the olympics: "come over and watch them with me." But I feel the key is treat it as it is, a FB relationship. Don't throw any curve balls in there and start talking about getting drinks somewhere, or even meeting up for coffee. That will just confuse her. Even if she turns you down now, as long as you play it cool (show indifference), it doesn't mean it can't happen sometime in the future. If anything, you can always keep this one the back burner until she warms back up.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

Also, if you're worried about getting too attached, check out this week's Bible Study reading. I'll give you a hint: Lesson 14.

And if you want to dig deeper into this FB thing, check out last week's discussion: Lesson 8, then the proceeding discussion on it.