"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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How Often Do You Hang Out With a Non-Committed Girl

wakingup

Don Juan
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I've been seeing a girl for about 2.5 months, we have seen each other 2 times a week generally and it increased to about 3-4 times last week. I'm just curious about the whole "progression" thing and what I should expect as this relationship progresses. She's a great girl and I've started to give up on my other plates a bit because I like hanging with her and we have a lot of mutual friends and interests.

I really value my freedom and alone time and I honestly only need sex 2 times a week for me to feel satisfied. So, is it realistic for me to expect this girl (who has had a very high IL since day 1) to be OK with that? If we don't keep moving towards hanging out like every day, should I expect her to lose interest or for the level of interest to drop? I don't ask in order to change my behavior, I'm just thinking about the psychology and if it is inevitable that unless we ramp up to sex every day, she will eventually lose interest.

One thought is that if I keep displaying high value and other girls keep hitting on me like they do, she probably won't lose interest if we continue to see each other 2-3 days a week. She is about a 7.5 and I am an 8 physically. Mentally she seems very mature and in control of her emotions.

Thoughts?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Reykhel

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I've been seeing a girl for about 2.5 months, we have seen each other 2 times a week generally and it increased to about 3-4 times last week. I'm just curious about the whole "progression" thing and what I should expect as this relationship progresses. She's a great girl and I've started to give up on my other plates a bit because I like hanging with her and we have a lot of mutual friends and interests.

I really value my freedom and alone time and I honestly only need sex 2 times a week for me to feel satisfied. So, is it realistic for me to expect this girl (who has had a very high IL since day 1) to be OK with that? If we don't keep moving towards hanging out like every day, should I expect her to lose interest or for the level of interest to drop? I don't ask in order to change my behavior, I'm just thinking about the psychology and if it is inevitable that unless we ramp up to sex every day, she will eventually lose interest.

One thought is that if I keep displaying high value and other girls keep hitting on me like they do, she probably won't lose interest if we continue to see each other 2-3 days a week. She is about a 7.5 and I am an 8 physically. Mentally she seems very mature and in control of her emotions.

Thoughts?
what progression thing? I'd be carefull about the 3-4 going any higher...

Familiarity breeds contempt, scarcity increases value. Always give her the gift of missing you..

You see a girl too much and she says "I need my space" ...she starts to take you for granted
as opposed to
You see a girl not so much and she says "can we see each other more" ....you've given her the gift of missing you

She will appreciate the fact that you have your own life and you are not needy......unless she's a needy cling biatch.....and you don't want that in any case. Space is your friend

Remember: mould the girl to suit your frame.
 

wakingup

Don Juan
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Reykhel - Thanks for your input. The "progression thing" I referred to is that usually in any relationship, job, endevour, hobby, etc. there are stages, right? So starting out is shaky, but as you become more familiar and invested, you begin to "progress" and spend more time doing something. I started playing guitar by borrowing my grandmother's old guitar, then buying a cheap guitar, a nice guitar, and now finally I've just purchased a custom guitar. I did not start out day one with a custom guitar. Another analogy is walking, you start as a baby taking that first step, then walking, then running, etc. You don't start running, you take one step and progress to running. I just meant that in life, things progress and so do romantic relationships. Does that make sense?

I think a girl says "I need my space" when a guy becomes too clingy, or displays other non-attractive behavior. However, just seeing a girl often I would argue wouldn't necessarily result in her saying "I need space" unless the man was displaying unattractive behavior. For instance, with this girl, after seeing her 3 days in a row she still would text me, "I feel like I haven't seen you in a while" after just two days.

I think the issue comes down to this: if you hang out often, there's more opportunity for her to see you when you're cranky, tired, annoyed, etc. and that is not a good thing. So, I think maybe this is the key, to somewhat avoid hanging out when you are not able to be upbeat, positive, ****y, funny, etc.

Anyways, thanks for your post it made me think a lot about my situation. Much appreciated.
 
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