"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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How not to laugh?

Nikar

Don Juan
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As you guys may know, if you're doing C+F or some jokes, sometimes it's good to keep a stern straight face as you're telling it to dramatically increase the tension, and in turn, make the things you say even funnier.

However, sometimes, for some reason, as I'm saying it, I couldn't help but kinda burst out laughing a little and I try to control it, but the girl already knows it. :crazy:

It's like:

Me: You know, that guy next door asked me yesterday about you (at this point, I burst out a bit and try to control my laughter).

Her: Oh, you're laughing again, I know you're lying, whatever you're gonna say.

(game is up)

.........blah blah blah.......takes away ALL the suspend, tension, humour and ruins everything.

So, any tricks or tips to keep a solid serious looking face?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Dedication

Senior Don Juan
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I have the same issue as you. Only my problem is that i keep laughing for 15 minutes straigth, i'm just too funny at time's :crackup: Usually i try to bite my tongue. But that only works for a second and then i continue my laugther.
 

mcs

Don Juan
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yea, i had the same problem. you know what helped me greatly - can you make decent sound when you breathe in? no! so just breathe in, that's just too simple.
 

HandyAndy

Banned
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Aug 18, 2007
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Cause yourself some sort of pain, it will get your mind off of what your saying until its actually said... no dont punch yourself in the face...

Bite you lip or pinch some part of your body
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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