how much value do project?

[superfrenchy]

hi,
i have been reading a lot on attraction and seduction but i find that girls have become so used to guys being so needy and now for example if you reverse the "drink" at a bar and ask her to buy you a drink, she lands up with a bad emotional response?

Its like your insulting her by asking her to buy you a drink... girls land up storming off blowing heat but at the same time they wont forget you?

either way you have to watch what to say or will they try to reject you the harshest way because by asking a girl to buy you a drink is basically saying your cheap and i am going to mess you around... ???

 

[rhythmic]

If the girl rejects you, that's fine - move on. You're offering her the opportunity to buy you a drink. I usually like to wait until they ask for something from me (my opinion on something, usually, or my answer to a question) and then tell them we can discuss it over the drink that they're about to buy me.

The point of asking them to buy you a drink is to display that you're different from what they're used to - this is a good thing. Girls don't want same old, they want excitement. By asking/telling her to buy you a drink, you're demonstrating that you aren't like 99% of other guys, who will climb over each other to buy her drink after drink in the hopes that maybe they'll get her number, or a kiss.

This is why I tend to bring the drink into it once they want an answer to a question from me - it completely changes the dynamic.

We're getting a drink, over which we will discuss something intriguing and fun!

is much better than

Let's get a drink, and then who knows, maybe you can give me your number, or something...

Create intrigue, create rapport, create interest, and sometimes they'll even offer to buy you a drink. Happened to me just last week.

 

[zekko]

First off, I don't drink anymore, so I don't go to bars, so I obviously don't buy girls (or myself) drinks. Having said that:

I've never understood what the big deal about buying drinks is. You buy her a drink, she buys you a drink, who cares? What's the big deal. I see pickup gurus say that if you buy a girl a drink, she will blow you out because of it. Why would that be, because it's a compliance test? Just because you buy a drink for a girl, she assumes you will do anything she says? Really? Life is weird.

I always thought the real reason you didn't buy drinks for girls is to keep from getting taken advantage of. If you are out hitting on girls in bars a lot, obviously it's going to add up quickly if you buy them all drinks. Plus I get the impression most guys into pickup don't have much money any way, and that's why it's such a big issue.

But to use it as a technique? Just seems kind of weird to me. And to flip the script by getting them to buy you drinks seems just as odd. I would say if you bought a girl a drink, then maybe she should buy you one. But I can't imagine it being the big deal that it's made into by PUAs.