"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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how much should a 1st date cost?

zonn

Don Juan
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How much should 1st date cost and where are best places to take them?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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dustmuffin

Master Don Juan
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I would do a coffee date. They are cheap. You can chat and see if there is a connection. I spent $5 on a coffee date a few weeks ago and took the girl home and got an excellent BJ.

If you don't want to do coffee try an action date like bowling. Anything action oriented. Don't do dinner. Don't spend a lot on the first few dates. Go for a walk etc. You don't want to spend a bunch on a ho that is just looking for free entertainment and will blow you off the next time.
 

Maximus Rex

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Some Place Where You Can Bond

The date should cost no more than $40 and it should take place some where you can get to know the chick and find out what she finds romantic. I'd suggest Subways, Starbucks, or Cold Stone Creamery.
 

Harry Wilmington

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It's not about how much the first date cost, it's about the experience. I've had first dates be a picnic in the park, or a walk through a mall/book store. That first "date" is really a "get to know you better" date. The 2nd date... even then, it doesn't have to be a lot of money. Comedy shows in many areas are free. So are walks on the beach, anything sight-seeing related (i.e. museums, hikes), going to a bingo night (you laugh, but I've done this and the girl I was with was giddy when she won twice in a row)... focus more on creativity and bonding activities vs. cost.
 
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Harry Wilmington said:
It's not about how much the first date cost, it's about the experience. I've had first dates be a picnic in the park, or a walk through a mall/book store. That first "date" is really a "get to know you better" date. The 2nd date... even then, it doesn't have to be a lot of money. Comedy shows in many areas are free. So are walks on the beach, anything sight-seeing related (i.e. museums, hikes), going to a bingo night (you laugh, but I've done this and the girl I was with was giddy when she won twice in a row)... focus more on creativity and bonding activities vs. cost.
I agree, there are plenty of extremely cheap or free things you can do that are tons of fun, however I think having a rough idea of how much you should be spending is still useful. I make about 70k a year and I spend ~$50 on the first date. Most of that is near the end of the night around 9-10pm for a dinner and drinks at a cheap but fun and unique restaurant assuming she was fun and I was into her. Also, I make her buy her own coffee at the beginning of the date haha.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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