"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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How much does attractiveness matter in the late 20s to early 30s age range?

revannt

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Title, but Im sort of more curious and nuanced with what I am trying to say.

In terms of the triad of Money, Status, and Looks, at what point does the third factor start playing a key role? Im curious to know because I feel like the landscape is quite nuanced, and right now Im young so looks are playing a huge part. In all honesty im not the most attractive guy, and I'd also say the vast majority of people in my area are unfortunately quite attractive. Im just curious to know and hoping that if I go very hard in my career while also being dedicated to self-improvement via the gym, will I be able to find a long term relationship? Feels like my generation is literally only filled with *****s, hence why I am asking.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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plumber

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yes self improvement will help. it will make you more attractive to others and also to yourself. looks always play a key role. the confusing part is how to id what good looks are. as it is in the eye of the beholder. money and status are easier to measure.
 

revannt

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yes self improvement will help. it will make you more attractive to others and also to yourself. looks always play a key role. the confusing part is how to id what good looks are. as it is in the eye of the beholder. money and status are easier to measure.
yeah but im asking how much does it play compared to money and status when you are older in terms of getting an LTR? In terms of the triad, what takes the highest priorty?
 

Prepostereax

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yeah but im asking how much does it play compared to money and status when you are older in terms of getting an LTR? In terms of the triad, what takes the highest priorty?
At your age range, you should be working on status.
Money will flow from that.
And looks matter far less as you mature.
 

revannt

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At your age range, you should be working on status.
Money will flow from that.
And looks matter far less as you mature.
ah ok. hoping the looks thing is true. i can work on the other two but i feel like my looks will be capped at some point in some way. appreciate it htough
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Prepostereax

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by status, I mean internal status rather than literal, hierarchical status (though that doesn't hurt)

ie internally validated status, self worth
(Hierarchical status is externally validated)

In some fields, and any politicalised organisation, it's near impossible to climb the ladder without kissing a whole bunch of metaphorical ass

And for the self-employed, eg trades, there's no hierarchy anyway

But knowing in yourself that you are the best damn plumber, painter, whatever in your locale will give you inner status that can't be faked.

Even if you're a garbage collector or deliveryman, you can have status.

Do things better than your peers
Be the person who they come to when shiet hits the fan
Be the one who is hardest to replace

It means knowing which corners you can cut, and when
vs knowing when it's important to pay close attention to detail

which tasks you should delegate
vs which you should attend to personally

Willing to rise above your paygrade even when you aren't remunerated appropriately
vs knowing when to say No

Since you mention LTR, having internal status is an essential step
Being picky about yourself allows you to be picky about who you partner with
 

plumber

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yeah but im asking how much does it play compared to money and status when you are older in terms of getting an LTR? In terms of the triad, what takes the highest priorty?
i believe it is location dependent. yes, i know that's not a direct answer.

explanation:

if the state ensures basic needs, no one then needs basic needs.

if the state does not do that, then those that need basic needs will look for solutions to that. money is the power of the modern world. money is literally translated as stored power. if you have money and the state does not take care of basic needs, you will have a very long line of available ltr. regardless of the other two category. in that line you will find some that are ok.

if the state does take care of basics, then looks and status move to the front.

much safer to rely on basic needs as a driver than status. status can be gamed, basics can not.

if you rely on looks, then your getting an ltr based on your looks and maybe nothing to do with your values.... good for short time, not ltr.


money drives status faster than looks.

looks are king for short time, but not for ltr.
 

BaronOfHair

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A man's appearance* almost always influences the degree to which not just women, but EVERYONE, is receptive to him. Not even talking being Calvin Klein model material here, just simply putting effort into yourself, an activity MOST fellas these days are avoiding as if it's bubonic plague

*By "appearance", I refer not just to the sort of mug a man has attached to his shoulders... Talking here the clothes he wears, the manner in which he holds himself, how he combs his hair, and the words he speaks. The sort of dreck taken to task here
stops being "cute", once you're in your late 20s-all points beyond
 
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