how many rejections before succes? here the answer will be reveled

[Cold Fyre]

I had been reading the dj site for a while and i learned all the secrets and all the tips and tricks by reading the post of the great djs like the all so famous pook, red-xl, MOTU, antidump, sir chanceallot, bond james bond and even the not so famous
improvingdonjuan,intermedatedonjuaner,........etc so many to name so little time.
so i decided i had graduated from all the theory, i knew so much, icould strike up a convo with the girls (or so i liked to believe) i knew how to be ****y and funny and i know about the kino and challenge and all the other stuff ( or so i thought) i wasnt getting played like a chump anymore.....that was a plus, i could get some girls attention and i sroke up a date every once in a while but

surprisingly the girls were not flocking to my now charming dj personality, i wasnt getting all the girls i dreamed of. why? i thought, oh well i dont need them, i answered myself, i am the prize im the great cold fyre, i am me, i should be happy with myself i am better that before that is evident.............but yet deep down inside i was unhappy.....i did not wanted to accept it but i always knew that until i got this part of my life handled i would not be truly confident or happy with myself. so i decided to do something about it NOW!!!!

I am pretty succesful and im feeling great. because let me tell you something succes is not getting a number, geting a date, getting laid, no my friends, success is to have enough balls to go out there and talk to the girl that catches your attention. success is the mere fact that you are not just looking and wishing but actually talking and trying, to succeed is to get rejected because you will learn from your mistakes and all of a sudden REJECTION is not that bad.

now let me tell you what i do, i have decided that everyday i will get minimum of 1 rejection and then hit the gym (or in the gym i coud get rejected too ) except for sundays (even the great cold fyre has to rest)

i will be writing a journal here (for inspiration and for any suggestions, and also to share what i learn)

so far

this is the list of girls i have encounter

date name age #close? dates kiss sex
11/02/04 carina 17? no no no no
description of approach: she is a salesgirl i pretended to be an interested costumer, she showed me some jewelry for my "little brother" (he was not with me by the way) then i went in for the djpractice me " youre kinda cute actually"
her " oh thanks"
me " do you have a boyfriend?"
her "yeah, look at me , do you think I WOULDN'T have a boyfriend?"
me " well depends , your attitude could be a real turn off, but i will let it slide, whats your phone number?"
her " i cant give it to you"

11/03/04 Melissa 21 no no no no
description of approach: another salesgirl in a different mall
me" do you have good taste?"
she " yeah (smiles)"
me " well good, cause im not really good at shoping and since you are a girl.....i think.......you could help me out"
she "you think? (laughs and gives me a playful puch in the arm)"
she helped me around a bit i negged her and made lots of Cand F coments to her we joked around alot. even her friends got to know how funny i am. i overheard them say " he is soooo funny"
so i thought it was going great ( i was more relaxed than my first apporach) at the end me " you know youre a fun girl, whats your phone number?"
she " (changed her attitude to a serious/nervous one) sorry i dont give out my number to........."

11/04/04 Angie 22 no no no no
description: she was running around the track in a gym, i went passed her a couple of times. she was listening to radio with headphones,
me" are you tired already?"
she" (takes of ther phones and asks) what?)
me " are you tired already? i mean you seem to be stoping alot"
she " you seem pretty tired yourself"
she "(stops) whats your name?"
me " cold fyre"
she " who"
me "cold fyre"
she started trying to joke with me getting me to repeat my name
i started laughing
she " starts running (looking at me)"
me "hey didnt your parenst ever teach you how to hand shake?"
she "(smiles) nice to meet you"
me " i have to go , but youre kinda cute, whats your phone number?"
she "kinda?"
me " yeah just a little"
she " i cant ,.......i have a boyfriend"

of course today is sunday, so i stayed home and rested rewarding myself with a pizza,and chocolate shakes,

 

[david90]

nice, keep up the good work.

 

[JT47319]

Critique notes...

It doesn't seem like you're building value or carrying on a normal conversation. I could be wrong, but from your excerpts, you're going straight for the #-close.

Generally speaking, unless you're a really good looking guy (and no, being cute or above average doesn't count), that approach rarely works.

Why? Because she's evaluating you on A) your looks and B) what value you've presented to her via your verbal game. And if you haven't presented value, then all she has to go on is your looks. And then either she's into your body or not without other factors to build you up.

You haven't really conveyed your personality except for being a funny guy. A funny guy does not necessarily mean a sexual guy or that she wants to date you. It's certainly a step above other lamers and AFCs, but unless she's already into you, you have to display other attractive elements. It's an all too easy trap to fall into being an "Dancing/Entertainment Monkey" that amuses her.

You have to qualify her so that she knows that you like her for more than just her looks, body, and sex.

You have to convey personality through stories, humor, etc. so she gets a sense of who you are and why she should like you.

You have to escalate kino and invade her body space to convey sexuality.

You have to project and convey high value via body language and verbal game so she knows that you are "in her league."

In order to progress a sarge beyond the simple open to a number, kiss, or fu ck close, you have to build rapport, convey interest, be interested in turn, build sexuality, etc.

 

[Mr.Hash wid da Stash]

me " do you have a boyfriend?" her: "do I look like I WOULDN'T have a boyfriend?"

Gaaawd Dayum! What a egotistical biatch!

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Saleswomen are really not the best women to approach...you're better off with women who are not working! They may be interested but they don't want to come off as unprofessional.

 

[Pugsley_f5]

Milkman made a really good post on my "Pug's 100 approach journal" thread about the use of pauses in the approach read his post and apply it it will help.

Pugs