How many of you are self-centred?

[diplomatic_lies]

Join the club! Remember, the world revolves around YOU! F*ck those kids in Africa, if they starve, how will it affect you?

Seriously, people ask me why I'm so self-centred, my reply is, because it's better than helping other people. Because, let's admit it, doesn't helping yourself give you a much better feeling?

 

[Skel]

I try not to be self centered but my friends say otherwise.
However I gotta disagree, helping others is a great feeling especially if those others really need help. Helping others can help you help yourself.

BUT...I go by philsophy there are only 2 kinds of people.

A**holes and pushovers. I would rather be an a**shole than a pushover.

 

[bbestar]

maybe not self-centered but self reliant

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

There are worlds of difference between Self-Centered, Self-Important and Selfish.

Personally I subscribe to Enlightened Self-Interest, I can't help anyone properly until I've helped myself.

 

[ethnomethodologist]

Originally posted by Rollo Tomassi
There are worlds of difference between Self-Centered, Self-Important and Selfish.

Personally I subscribe to Enlightened Self-Interest, I can't help anyone properly until I've helped myself.

So what's that? Being caught between two worlds?

In one world you are self-centered in the other... selfish?

They all sound the same, important giving out the least demeaning of the trio.

 

[Visceral]

It's weird.

I've never been a fan of myself, but I have no great love for others either. I've never wished harm on anyone, but I'm not falling over myself to help anyone either.

I don't derive physical pleasure or emotional satisfaction from either selfishness or selflessness, so in any given situation, I choose the path of least effort ... which doesn't bring me pleasure or happiness either, so life sucks no matter what I do.

 

[ethnomethodologist]

Originally posted by Visceral
It's weird.

I've never been a fan of myself, but I have no great love for others either. I've never wished harm on anyone, but I'm not falling over myself to help anyone either.

I don't derive physical pleasure or emotional satisfaction from either selfishness or selflessness, so in any given situation, I choose the path of least effort ... which doesn't bring me pleasure or happiness either, so life sucks no matter what I do.

Wow, your life seems so dull. Is that why you came to this site?

 

[Visceral]

Originally posted by ethnomethodologist
Wow, your life seems so dull. Is that why you came to this site?

I came to this site for the same reasons any man does - thinking a big bag of techniques would make getting women easier.

I've stayed because my life is dull.

I figure the solution to my problem is to enjoy life, because I'm never going to lift a finger unless it feels good to do so, especially since I know from experience that if action and inaction are equally unfulfilling, then a man will choose the easier one every time.

This is why I have such a hard time motivating myself. It's not about accomplishing things - at least not yet - but instead is about simply enjoying being alive and myself. I have to enjoy the work in order to be motivated to do it because right now, the prize really doesn't matter to me.

 

[ethnomethodologist]

Originally posted by Visceral
I came to this site for the same reasons any man does - thinking a big bag of techniques would make getting women easier.

I've stayed because my life is dull.

I figure the solution to my problem is to enjoy life, because I'm never going to lift a finger unless it feels good to do so, especially since I know from experience that if action and inaction are equally unfulfilling, then a man will choose the easier one every time.

This is why I have such a hard time motivating myself. It's not about accomplishing things - at least not yet - but instead is about simply enjoying being alive and myself.

Nice, I pressed respond before you edited your post, nice to know we're operating at almost the same wavelength...

I'm in the same boat as you. Without self gratification I tend to stay away from pleasing other people. Though I do so LOVE the feeling of seeing the progress of people that I have taught, I'd much rather lean back and laugh at them fvckin up. It's like a human disease, I can't even describe it. It can't be measured yet, and it can't be solved without literally becoming an AFC.

Once you know the solution, a lot of the times you won't put it into practice... as for me, I can do all this jazz, I've got a big bag of tricks, and I can pull them out whenever I choose to do so. The problem is, I never want to, I don't see the value in it for me. Like two seconds of smiles from a crowd doesn't do me any good if I only smile for one.

 

[Visceral]

Originally posted by ethnomethodologist
I'm in the same boat as you. Without self gratification I tend to stay away from pleasing other people. Though I do so LOVE the feeling of seeing the progress of people that I have taught, I'd much rather lean back and laugh at them fvckin up. It's like a human disease, I can't even describe it. It can't be measured yet, and it can't be solved without literally becoming an AFC.

I suppose you just need to focus on getting that self-gratification and not worry if it doesn't please others. So long as what you do doesn't harm anyone else, then I doubt that you'd be putting yourself at risk. At least you have things in your life that give you self-gratification; I only get that from my hand.

I don't like it when other people fail because it's too easy to imagine the same (or worse) happening to me. My only problem with someone else's success is how bad about myself it makes me feel. I don't know how other men manage to get motivated by someone better than them, because they just depress me.

Once you know the solution, a lot of the times you won't put it into practice... as for me, I can do all this jazz, I've got a big bag of tricks, and I can pull them out whenever I choose to do so. The problem is, I never want to, I don't see the value in it for me. Like two seconds of smiles from a crowd doesn't do me any good if I only smile for one.

Perhaps this is why being goal-oriented is said to be so important; when the goal matters enough, you won't care about how much getting there might suck. I've asked a lot of people about how to get like this, but all they're able to tell me is "You have to want it bad enough." I then ask them: "How do you want something that bad?" ... at which point they just look at me like I've asked the dumbest question of all time.

 

[ethnomethodologist]

Originally posted by Visceral
I suppose you just need to focus on getting that self-gratification and not worry if it doesn't please others. So long as what you do doesn't harm anyone else, then I doubt that you'd be putting yourself at risk. At least you have things in your life that give you self-gratification; I only get that from my hand.

I don't like it when other people fail because it's too easy to imagine the same (or worse) happening to me. My only problem with someone else's success is how bad about myself it makes me feel. I don't know how other men manage to get motivated by someone better than them, because they just depress me.
Perhaps this is why being goal-oriented is said to be so important; when the goal matters enough, you won't care about how much getting there might suck. I've asked a lot of people about how to get like this, but all they're able to tell me is "You have to want it bad enough." I then ask them: "How do you want something that bad?" ... at which point they just look at me like I've asked the dumbest question of all time.

I was waiting for the moment you would respond to this concept.. Actually I'm amazed Nocturnal is speaking to me as well...

Just food for thought. Do you know which single thread since Agust has been the most interesting to me? I still have your discussion in my summer jacket. Five pages of fine print material covering the middle portion of your argument with Nocturnal. You guys were discussing the values of business in a thread that questioned the very fabric of your lifestyle. There really was no comments made on the actual question at hand, but the discussion was deep and it was you two arguing two different worlds of thought. I studied that page, have made no extrapolations about it on my own, it was just too deep for my current thoughts to fathom. You were both the biggest DJ's and concurrent AFC's in that thread it was amazing...

 

[PeterNorthisawesome]

Everyone in this world is somewhat selfish, people get mad at you for not doing something that THEY WANT you to do. Personally I support Darwin's theory of revolution and like that idea of only the fit survive. So usually I don't give a f*** about others, I'm too busy for listening and wasting my time on others. In the end it's all about you, noone will do anything for you so if you want something you have to do it yourself. :woo:

 

[Brian20o2]

I dont try or want to be selfish but I do put my own well being before others. Once my life is on track then I can help people. But its hard to help people when you have nothing.

 

[organizedconfusion]

i think you have to be self-centered to a degree..you must help yourself before you can help anyone else you know? i think that the people that get upset because when someone is self-reliant ,they people that aren't are the ones that somehow wish they could be self-reliant themselves and are offended that you don't need them or want them in your life in order to be happy..you don't need them, you don't need others ..and i think that it may make people feel unwanted ,undesired and somewhat unappreitative.
doing whats on your agenda,what you need to do and what needs to get done in order to get ahead.Going to school,working ,taking care of buisness..most people don't like to rely on themselves solely because i think that people are afraid somewhat to go at it alone..it's comfortable in numbers and it's an easy support group to fall back on. I have been called a flake, self-centered ,self-absorbed and narrissistic..but then again , i look at myself,my body, my mindset and my values and i can see that it's totally different from theirs...i do for myself what i need to in order to get my ass where it needs to be, no outside motivation , no force, no support group , no nothing..mostly because i know what needs to be done and i don't need to go out and take a personal survey or take a poll of answers or opinions before i set out and do something..it's me and only me and i am proud of that..nothing from nobody,unless i decide it's helpfull for the both of us..

i help others when help is needed but not blindingly and certainly not unconditionaly..come on , if common sense tells me that it's not the best time or way to help someone- i don't and i won't have any guilt over it either..