"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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How looks can affect your game.

I-am-someone

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I've stated this before, I'm a pretty goodlooking guy. When I walk into a club, I get eyecontact with around 80% of the women there, if I want to. I know this sounds sweet to most of you guys, but there are several definite downsides to this.

1. You have to live up to something. Women look at you and expect for you to be someone better than you can possibly be. Then you start talking, and immediatly you are brought back down to the level of someone human. This happens every time, they smile when I approach them, I start talking and they start to lose interest in a matter of seconds. I know this just sounds like bad game, and it probably is. However, it's goddamn difficult to fight this because I basically have to be someone I'm not.

2. There are just way too many girls out there. If you have eyecontact with every girl there, you just feel like they're all too easy. It often leaves me not wanting any of them, until I see the woman that doesn't give me eyecontact and then I feel myself wanting this woman, but ofcourse that woman is usually not interested in me.

These are just two of my bigger problems right now.
I went to a club last night, walked in, had eyecontact with 5 HB8.5's and above but didn't approach any of them, because I had also had eyecontact with so many other chicks and just didn't really feel like approaching anymore.
Ofcourse, I was also feeling very tired because I had hardly slept the night before and had been shopping w/ my brother most of the day. After that we got locked out of his house and had to wait in the cold for an hour, so I was somewhat tired by the time we went clubbing.

Anyway, I know I have great potential, I'm just not taking advantage of it for some reason. Perhaps it's just an excuse I have made up not to approach women, but I certainly feel like I'm wasting a lot of my potential, yet I'm not doing anything about that waste.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Donald Kaufman

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The 3 second rule should probably be cut down to the one second rule for you. If an abundance of choices is leaving you unable to choose. Go after the first one that looks good immediately. Stop looking for other options. Pursue this one until you no longer want to or have what you think you can get then scan until the first good one you see and approach with laser precision.

Both not being to find anyone attractive enough to talk to and finding everyone attractive to talk to are diversions and not the real problem. To those who can find no one good enough in a place filled with young, approachable women just go talk to one to keep in practice. To those who can't decide just approach the first one you see. The first migh find women have more then fist impressions to offer and the latter might find that not all that glitters is gold.
 

Freeman

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Originally posted by I-am-someone
I've stated this before, I'm a pretty goodlooking guy. When I walk into a club, I get eyecontact with around 80% of the women there, if I want to. I know this sounds sweet to most of you guys, but there are several definite downsides to this.

1. You have to live up to something. Women look at you and expect for you to be someone better than you can possibly be. Then you start talking, and immediatly you are brought back down to the level of someone human. This happens every time, they smile when I approach them, I start talking and they start to lose interest in a matter of seconds. I know this just sounds like bad game, and it probably is. However, it's goddamn difficult to fight this because I basically have to be someone I'm not.

2. There are just way too many girls out there. If you have eyecontact with every girl there, you just feel like they're all too easy. It often leaves me not wanting any of them, until I see the woman that doesn't give me eyecontact and then I feel myself wanting this woman, but ofcourse that woman is usually not interested in me.

These are just two of my bigger problems right now.
I went to a club last night, walked in, had eyecontact with 5 HB8.5's and above but didn't approach any of them, because I had also had eyecontact with so many other chicks and just didn't really feel like approaching anymore.
Ofcourse, I was also feeling very tired because I had hardly slept the night before and had been shopping w/ my brother most of the day. After that we got locked out of his house and had to wait in the cold for an hour, so I was somewhat tired by the time we went clubbing.

Anyway, I know I have great potential, I'm just not taking advantage of it for some reason. Perhaps it's just an excuse I have made up not to approach women, but I certainly feel like I'm wasting a lot of my potential, yet I'm not doing anything about that waste.

Finally someone knows what I'm talking about-Having expectations set on you because youre better looking than the average guy. You know that girls look at you but the ones that you really want aren't looking at you... yep I understand man..but you know what I've figured its a psychological problem--Obviously you have an ego to think that 80% of the women at a club are checking you out which is high confidence in your looks-but then you say after they talk to you they get turned off, that sounds like a low confidence in your game. See what I've figured out in the past 2 years in college is that its not even so much of what you say but how you say it. When you talk to these girls I assume that you probably have a look of uncertainty. To a female that means low self-esteem and there's nothing more that turns off a girl than a guy with low self-esteem. I don't care if you look like BRAD PITT-if he have low self-esteem they will just find some other hot guy with confidence. You have to believe in what your saying to these girls..you can't blurt out a bunch of cheese ball lines to them and expect them to fall for you just because you look good. Just like hot female come dime a dozen, same goes for guys..

So in short-Work on your game and BELIEVE in what your're selling to these girls man!

AIGHT! PEACE!
 

Jariel

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I agree. People keep telling me I can have any woman I want, yet the women I do want are surrounded by complicated situations, have boyfriends or don't show interest in me. What's more, I know a lot of women want me based on my looks alone, but I want someone who wants and respects me as a person, but just like you, I can't live up to their expectations.
 

ScrewIt

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I can completely relate. the ones that are interested in me i dont want, the ones i do want are unavailable or dont show signs. i would be a great catch cause they can just use me as a trophy and show off to their friends....as they always have in the past. I feel somewhat used. I think thats the reason why i've grown to be a bit more selective with woman than most people.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Double

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you sound like a confused little girl who doesn't know what she wants. you say that you feel you can get girls too easy and because of that you have not interest in fvcking them, because they represent no challenge. but you also say they lose interest when you talk to them quickly....which one is it now - is it too easy for you to pull HB's or too difficult?LOL, this thread is a joke,isnt it?

Anyway, I know I have great potential, I'm just not taking advantage of it for some reason. Perhaps it's just an excuse I have made up not to approach women, but I certainly feel like I'm wasting a lot of my potential, yet I'm not doing anything about that waste.
sorry, i didnt read that when i wrote my reply....ok at least your being honest. you will make it, just give it some time and stop with stupid excuses like they represent no challenge.
 

gruby

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Clubs are to picks up temporary puss-y not to find gf. Why the hell would you be so pick about girl you only gonna see one night?
 
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