How long does it take to get over a ltr

[guru1000]

Hey Danny,

We have all been there once upon a time.

What you have to REALIZE to move on, is that the girl filled a specific VOID in you. Now that she is gone, you have an empty VOID in you again.

This is the best thing to happen to you long term.

What you must do now is RECOGNIZE and FILL this VOID up with YOU.

It is all about YOU now. Center on yourself and FOCUS only on you.

You are no LONGER slave to a woman to complete you. You are free and self satisfying. This is the essence of a Don Juan. You needed to get to this point for self actualization and realization.

No one can COMPLETE you. You COMPLETE you.

This PAIN in necessary for GROWTH.

Remember and embrace this PAIN. It will always serve as a reminder to PUT you first.

From now on, you come FIRST. Always! Never surrender your character and remember this time.

 

[DannykDJ]

Thank you all for helping me.

To clear things up I have no problem being single or by myself. I would rather be alone than with someone who doesn't care about me. I liked this girl for qualities she has. I don't date just for the sake of having a gf. It's just I feel so betrayed right now. She lied to my face about how much she cared for me and I believed it. I allowed myself to bond with her and develop deep feelings for her. She burned me like no one has ever done before. I respect that we are in different places in life right now. She is a very high quality woman, but her only major flaw is she is insecure. She is easily influenced by her friends and tries to hard to be "cool" around them. I do hope she out grows the bar and club phase before it messes her up like it has done her friends.

WTF is wrong with me right now anyway. I have never been emotional in my life and I even have a reputation for always staying calm and collected with the people in my life. My new years resolution 5 years ago was to never let anyone see any negative emotion from me.

Going out only makes it worse. The only thing that seems to make me feel better is ordering a pizza and renting a movie and staying in. Last week when I went out with my parents for my dads 60 birthday the girl at the restaurant told me point blank I was cute and I didn't make a move just because I can't control my emotions.

 

[MacAvoy]

Going out only makes it worse. The only thing that seems to make me feel better is ordering a pizza and renting a movie and staying in.

There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with this. Its a good thing that you can be alone and comfortable with yourself.

However as Joekerr says The problem with making women the 'point' of life is that when they screw you over, you start thinking 'theres no point' to life.

So don't allow yourself to fall into the trap of sitting at home and wallowing in your misery. This is what women do. But more importantly, it becomes addictive and a negative cycle.

 

[Interceptor]

I think it is not good advice to simply 'find another girl'.
if you use a woman to fill up a void in your soul, it doesnt matter how many women or which woman you have, no woman can fill it.
When she's gone, you will be right back to square one.


All you will be doing is repeating the same mistakes as you did with the previous woman.
If you dont deal with YOUR issues, you will end up in the vicous cycle, the Infinity Gauntlet.

you have to discover, and identify and remove those beliefs you have, and fill up the void you have your SELF .

You cannot rely on a person to fill that void that only YOU can fill.

You must have a life independent of women. A life that satisfies YOU.

 

[DonGorgon]

LTR is a year or more and on average it takes half the time you were in it to recover your emotional serf sufficiency to a normal level... BUT in most cases where an LTR goes over 5 years you may never get over that person 100%...

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

It's going to take as long as you allow it to take. If you're just sitting around trying to give it time you'll be sitting around for a long time. Why? Because time is worthless without action. Until you decide to get up and do something, you're just going to sit and stew. Here's a picture for 'ya, your relationship is a diaper you're wearing and you made "boom-boom." How long do you plan on sitting in it?

 

[theunflushables]

The best way to over a woman is to get under another.

 

[SmoothTalker]

Damn DonGorgon, I hope you aren't serious. I'm not putting up with this crap for another year and a half.