How do you view other people?

[WCF]

I'm not talking about just women, but people in general.

I'm a believer that we all have our strengths and weaknesses, but I've found that I may bee overly critical of people. When thinking of someone, I often start analyzing everything about them from their social skills to physical appearance to mental capabilities. A lot of the times (especially when feeling threatened), I often emphasize weaknesses, presumably to make myself feel better. For example, I'll think "Well, he has lots of friends, but he's not a very good looking guy" or "She looks attractive, but she's not very bright." I'll usually compare my own strengths and weaknesses to another person's as if its a competition to score the most points

Is it normal to think like this or is it a sign of insecurity? I often feel guilty about this, because we're commonly told to see the best in each other; that thinking negatively about others is bad. I know that just might be typical, feel-good type of advice, but I wanted to how this community feels. How would a DJ think of another person, man or woman? Does he see himself as above all the others? Does he compare himself to others? Does he not even worry about these sort of things? etc etc.

Interestingly enough, this type of thinking only became a cause for concern for me when it skyrocketed ever since I've started visiting this site (not badmouthing the site. It does more good than harm). This is probably as a result of becoming more obsessed with status and "being alpha" and things like that; I've become very competitive.

 

[Bible_Belt]

If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be
greater and lesser persons than yourself.


That is from a poem that women like to hang in bathrooms, but it is still very true.

It's not easy to control what you think, but you can control what you say. I think the biggest AMOG to any guy is a genuine compliment about what a girl has probably already noticed anyway.

 

[Ganondorf]

I think for the most part people think that way. It can be from your being obsessed with being alpha and making yourself out to have a leg up on someone who might threaten you in anyway.

This type of thinking is not healthy though lol. It's a common trait for Humans to Judge each other, but read the poem BB posted above

and realize that being "alpha" just means being secure in yourself. It does not mean that you are above anyone else, or better than anyone else. You are just as good as they are.

A DJ realizes that he is just a man. He is not THE man. He is just a man. He is no better than anyone else, or no worse than anyone else. he is secure with himself and doesn't belittle others, but also doesn't blow himself up to look like some Big ego balloon either.

There is Good in everyone, and you should aim to see the positives of every person. everyone has strengths and weaknesses.

hell, even the Biggest "AFC" has something that the Biggest "DJ" does not have.

And to through some Bible in there. the Lord says that everyone is Lovable, and that their is Good in everyone

 

[WCF]

Well I personally think this is an interesting topic. It's common for humans to judge each other, but I wonder to what extent? When does it become too much? In my case, I've had a oneitis for almost a year now and most of my critical thinking is a futile attempt at trying to get over her ("She wasn't that pretty anyway," "She always needed makeup," "She believes some weird stuff," etc). Eh, it's a temporary fix.

Ganondorf I like your definition of a DJ. "He is not THE man. He is just a man." It's really got me thinking and feels contradictory to a lot of what we see on this forum.