how do you stop worrying so much?

[killbill]

I have been a pretty good guy my whole life and I admit I have done some stuff in the past I regret. Since I have passed the age of 18 I have really grown up I felt. I have only done one stupid thing and I even told my parents and they forgave me. The thing is I have done stuff like 6 years ago thats still bothering me today.

By the way I have to take medicine. cause I have anxiety and depression. I have been taking it for 3 months. At first I was doing good, now I feel really f*cked up.

What can I do to stop worrying? what would you do if you were me?

 

[joekerr31]

worrying is a problem for 99% of the population.

theres a reason so many peopel are depressed, stressed out, abusing alcohol or drugs, overweight, getting plastic surgery, etc. - its all rooted in worry - worry that they arent good enough, worry that they are missing out on a better life, etc.

personally i think its a function of mass media - which saturates society with absurd notions of reality. people are always comparing themselves to these idiotic standards and then getting upset that they seem no where near them.

my advice to you is to unplug. stop watching television and you'll find you feel better within a month.

once you've done that set a few life goals. where do you want to see yourself in 10 years. then pursue that goal.

simplicity is the key to life - at any given time you should only care about 3-5 things in your life. these are the things you allocate your energy to and worry about when needed - everything else you should not give two sh*ts about.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Consider the probability of the worse case scenario happening. Is worrying worth the effort of the chance of those things happening?

 

[killbill]

Hey to both of you guys I thank you very much. I will give both your advice a try. Thanks again.

 

[The Sperminator]

I used to be the biggest worrier ever. Any little thing used to stress me out. Then in the last two years I had no worries. I was the most laid back carefree guy ever. People would say how are you so calm about everything. Like I lost my wallet last week and I was all calm and just causally looked for it and I did find it. My old self would of went crazy and started stressing out but would that help me find my wallet. No. I finally realized that worrying does nothing but worry you more. Makes things worst. Does it ever fix anything? The answer is no. All it does is cause more stress and problems for you. For example in school if I think I did bad in a test I would worry the whole entire week. Did it improve my grade? Nope. I still failed lol. Then I thought to myself how about forget about it. Enjoy my week and weekend. Whatever happens happens. Nothing I can do about it. Too late to fix it. And if I did fail I wouldn't even get mad or depressed. I would just be like oh well I'll study harder next time. When I say don't worry I don't mean slack off and don't care about anything I just mean if something bad happened forget about it and move on. Fix your mistake so next time it doesn't happen again. The past is the past no point in worrying. No way you can fix your problem by worrying. Whatever happened in the past is done and over with you can't go back in time and fix it unless you have like a time machine and if you do then damn you are lucky.

 

[Ace of Flames]

I used to be the biggest worrier ever. Any little thing used to stress me out. Then in the last two years I had no worries. I was the most laid back carefree guy ever. People would say how are you so calm about everything. Like I lost my wallet last week and I was all calm and just causally looked for it and I did find it. My old self would of went crazy and started stressing out but would that help me find my wallet. No. I finally realized that worrying does nothing but worry you more. Makes things worst. Does it ever fix anything? The answer is no. All it does is cause more stress and problems for you. For example in school if I think I did bad in a test I would worry the whole entire week. Did it improve my grade? Nope. I still failed lol. Then I thought to myself how about forget about it. Enjoy my week and weekend. Whatever happens happens. Nothing I can do about it. Too late to fix it. And if I did fail I wouldn't even get mad or depressed. I would just be like oh well I'll study harder next time. When I say don't worry I don't mean slack off and don't care about anything I just mean if something bad happened forget about it and move on. Fix your mistake so next time it doesn't happen again. The past is the past no point in worrying. No way you can fix your problem by worrying. Whatever happened in the past is done and over with you can't go back in time and fix it unless you have like a time machine and if you do then damn you are lucky.

This generally describes the way I live my life. You hit my philosophy right on the head.

So, isn't it a relaxing life? Lots less stress, no real worries, nothing really gets to you or brings you down. I love it!

:woo:

 

[Stud]

I too used to be a worry wart. Then I realized that everyone is f ucked, regardless of how much you worry, you just have to learn to roll with the punches.

This quote pretty much sums everything up..

"You have power over your mind--not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength."
- Marcus Aurelius

 

[cant think of a user name]

^excellent quote

 

[jesusrules]

I too used to be a worry wart. Then I realized that everyone is f ucked, regardless of how much you worry, you just have to learn to roll with the punches.

This quote pretty much sums everything up..

"You have power over your mind--not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength."
- Marcus Aurelius

dude, thats a good quote.

 

[dietzcoi]

Marcus Aurelius was a great philosopher. But, it can be hard to put his principles into reality at our level

Dietzcoi

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...
"You have power over your mind [and your actions]--not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength."
- Marcus Aurelius

[$Fd]

 

[The Sperminator]

Heres another quote. 10% of life is the events that happen to you the other 90% is how you react to them. Something like that.

 

[i am me]

i like to compare lifes problems to basketball...if u shoot a bad shot, wut are u gonna do? feel bad and stop playing? or are u gonna play harder so that u hav a better chance next time. go ahead and take a lil time to think...but remember to keep moving forward

 

[Stud]

Marcus Aurelius was a great philosopher. But, it can be hard to put his principles into reality at our level

Dietzcoi

what specifically about his principles do you find hard to apply to your life?

 

[azanon]

What can I do to stop worrying? what would you do if you were me?

These guys already have listed some great ideas.

If its something specific, list the possible scenarios that could happen, and decide on a response/contingency plan before hand. Not every ending is optimial or bliss, but you do what you can, right? Once you've done that (either in your mind, or on paper), then let it go and forget about it until/unless one of those bad scenarios actually happen, then do what you decided beforehand. Most likely, you'll just forget about it and the worry will never come to fruition.

When you execute one of those contingency plans without even flinching (in what is supposed to be a really bad scenario), then wow, do you look powerful. Those watching will think, "not even that fazes him"???

 

[Jariel]

I used to have nervous problems, anxiety and was one of these guys who would carry the world's problems on his shoulders. I too suffered from depression. Now, I'm the opposite...sometimes too laidback.

For me, the solution was simply to realise and accept that I cannot control everything. If I'm faced with a problem I can solve, I will solve it. If I can't, then I let it go and push it out of my head. No point wasting time on something I can't change.

Sometimes you have to make a conscious effort. When something is bothering you, then literally shrug your shoulders and think about what I said above. When a negative thought or worry enters your head, force it out. Go and play a video game, watch a comedy or something frivolous.

In the short term, I find that an engaging project (redecorating, building a computer, starting a business, painting a picture and so on) is a great way to occupy your mind and keep worry at bay.

 

[SinJester]

I am still a guy that worries way too much. It goes in waves. Some days I am confident and couldn't give a **** if I tired, others I worry frantically. I think that unfortunately the second one happens more. Your' quotes and messeges are great but it's hard to remember and use them when **** actually happens.

 

[dietzcoi]

Stud

I find it easy to agree with Marcus' philosophy of not letting external things bother you or disturb you; yet it is very difficult to force yourself to ignore insults, slights or disrespect and force yourself to believe that this has no effect on you. It takes a pretty strong person to force themselves to revoke all feelings about external events. I am sure some can do it; I just find it hard. A weakness of my mind? I am sure my inability to ignore external injuries has caused me no small amount of suffering, for no real reason.

Dietzcoi

 

[ChrizZ]

How to stop worrying and start living - Dale Carnegie

^

read that.

 

[killbill]

hey thanks everyone. I will give everyones advice a try, thanks