Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
He has suffered a break up and lost money in the marketArtVandelay said:This guy is clinically depressed. He says there's no particular reason why he's feeling this way, yet he can't stop crying and thinks that life isn't worth living? No offense to the people who have tried to help him, but this guy needs a psychiatrist to put him on the right medication. I was depressed (still am, but not nearly as much as I was) and thought I was above taking pills, always thought casually about suicide and eventually one day I broke down crying and tried to kill myself. Medication won't solve all of his problems, but he'll be able to walk around all day without feeling really bad for no reason.
Danny, put aside your ego and go see a professional.
Could you explain this?ArtVandelay said:but that was the symptom, not the actual problem.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Interceptor said:Danny, I think you should do the research for yourself
I am willing to help you , but not spoon feed you
You are a grown man
I do believe you may want to try some hypnosis
it is possible to influence your sub conscious m ind to have positive and liberating beliefs
Go here and listen to these;
http://www.hypnotica.org/privatedownloads.htm
I still say you should check out EFT
Go here:
http://www.innergametapping.com/
You may want to look up Reiki healing as well
http://video.google.com/videoplay?d...aling+session&ei=25oLSKzjNqXQ4ALD_ZGqBA&hl=en
Try this
http://video.google.com/videoplay?d...aling+session&ei=25oLSKzjNqXQ4ALD_ZGqBA&hl=en
Stick to this, Danny
You keep giving up on yourself
Stop this behavior
LOOK AT WHAT IT IS DOING TO YOU
What more motivation do you want????!!
Stop this.
And start Living the Life YOU WANT!!!!
i have pointed you in a number of directions to begin, there is no simplw way to just click a light switch and have everything be ok. if you want try medication but its going to take some effort on your part. here is another good book for your situation: http://www.amazon.com/Bonds-That-Ma...=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1208726901&sr=8-1 Bonds That Make Us Free: Healing Our Relationships, Coming to Ourselves This wil get to the root of your thinking and changing it as well as help with your relationship skills. It's a complex read though. now that is four books I've suggested throughout my posts that will help you. now get to work. and get some exercise to. you need to release some endorphins.dannyegg4575 said:Guys! I don't need a psychiatrist... seriously...
What I really need is some advice on how to deal with the negative thoughts and the "good feeling of her" that is coming into my head. That is all.
How do you deal with it? i am not sure if you understand what I mean...
I want to isolate my mind from having so much thoughts running around... it's really really hard to concentrate, I can't shut them off. A lot of times when someone tells me something, I would go blank because my mind is not in the moment and I am zoned out. i don't want that anymore... I just want the freedom I used to have.
i know my self esteem is draining like a flush from a toilet bowl... and I just want to stop the draining further... what can i do?
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
I think he already read that, and got frustrated he needs to understand that not all the answers are gonna be found in one book. he's looking for a quick fix. I hope he stays away from the bottle.. it'll only make things worse in the end dannyInterceptor said:I definitely recommend everyone read Eckhart Tolles' Power of Now.
You will find helpful insight there.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
DarthAngel707 said:Hi Danny, here is something that might help:
The Flip-Switch Method
This is a popular method and is also called the neuro-associative conditioning method by tony robbins. And it is really simple: whenever a negative, anxious thought immediately think of something funny/positive. The key is that you must do this for every single negative thought that comes in your mind and eventually you will start to have a positive train of thought. This method is old and most people know it, but it still works.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.