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How do you "officially" become bf/gf?

j8snx1

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I kissed this girl I dated last Saturday, and it was our first date. Everything was just falling into place and she gave me too many green lights, so I gave it a go that day.

We met/talked the following Monday; it was a wee bit awkward but then I gradually caught on with my old funny self and just busted on her and socially interacted with my/her friends. That day while I was out with some of the boys, she texted me, starting with the conventional conversations like WHERE ARE YOU? and HOW ARE YA?
then...
exerpt of text's:

me: "...and stop copying my o so suave "it's all good" line!"
her: "it's just so sexy...just like you."
me: "haha you just noticed eh? well before you try to dig into my pants by complimenting, I'm gonna do some work."

I want to ask you older DJ's...

Now that we already took the leap o' faith by kissing already, how should I OFFICIALLY make her my girlfriend?

do i just ask her one day if she wants to take the relationship further by 'officially' becoming bf/gf? how did you guys go about with this ordeal?
 

abcd_z

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This was originally posted on the mASF forums several years ago. Hope you find it applicable.
neo-rio said:
As much as I hate the r-word, relationships are what exactly?

Relationships only build over time... so technically you cannot ever decide with a chick just after the first time you **** her "Hey let's have a relationship". Bull****. You can't do it. The only way you can get one is SPEND TIME together. The TIME you spend together is the relationship, and that time starts as soon as you meet her.

A relationship is NOT some ****ed up concept where you only have some mutual agreement to see her as your girlfriend for some time or whatever, and you can only **** her or something. That's bull****.
 

sparky1981

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though i beleive the same as mentioned above. Having that concept is good for security and ofton for hers. Just ask her if your now "bf/gf" or if she wants to be
 

Cruise

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She digs your funny/****y routine. Obviously you want to stay with that routine. DO NOT turn into a beeyatch and submit or wait for HER approval.

If you feel it's right... just let her know, in a funny sort of way. Just assume the relationship already IS boyfriend/girlfriend.

Say for instance you guys are relaxing somewhere, just kicking back and shooting the breeze.

Casually pop it up by saying, "You know what? I don't think we even went on our first date as a couple. As a matter of fact, I don't even think we even set any ground rules yet. Let's go ahead and set them..." just as a matter of conversation. When you assume it, and you set a funny ground rule... for example, 'no farting from her part of the bargain', it comes across one way as just being casual, and another part of her is even more interested, because she just might actually be getting into a real relationship. In any case, it's presented non-threateningly, which, in my experience, has worked wonders. Conversations like this usually evolve when you really lay out the groundwork as to how this relationship is going to look like, and she usually ends up being really serious about it... especially if you just keep it light and fun. Let it evolve, have fun with her while joking about it, and let HER start leading it to where she wants to take it. Believe me, she'll do it. ;)

examples of groundrules:

"No farting."
"Can I fart?"
"No kiss and tell."
"I can let you cry on my shoulders if you promise you don't get your snot on my sweatshirt."
"No cheating, unless... uh..." (This one's money, because if you say this, you know EXACTLY where she stands on this issue just by her response.)
"When I'm sick, I'll have a ________________ (meal) from ______________ (name your restaurant.) Alright? What about you, what would you have when you're sick? (Wait for her answer)... Will a bag of doritos from 7/11 do? (smirk)"

Keep doing these things, it's money, it's charming, and it only sets the context for the relationship.

Rootin for ya!
 

OfficeSpace

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that no farting line is kinda gross man.. I dunno but if I ever saw a chick fart or if she talked aout farting or something.. It's an instant turnoff for me.. If I had to use something liek that.. I'd leave farting out of it..
 

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Cruise

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LOL... you'd be surprised at how many couples actually fart around each other when they REALLY start to get comfortable around each other. That's the next level in relationships bro, trust me. ;)

You don't necessarily have to use that line, I was using that as an example of what you want to bring up, ballpark-wise. btw, she'll let you know where she's at on that issue also, you'll get a WHOLE bunch of insight from her response, it's interesting. ;)
 

Keeper

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Well, after a few weeks of dating my current GF, I made a statement one day: "Okay, woman. From now on, I give you permission to call me your boyfriend and tell people that I am that... Except to your sister... she'd kill me if she found out I was cheating on her. *wink*"

Whatever you do, DON'T do a proposal. DO NOT give her some trinket as a sign of your devotion, on your knees while saying: "Will you be my girlfriend? *puppy eyes*". I joked about that once, and one of my mates took it seriously. He tried it, but didn't give him the magic results he was hoping for. And it was just gay.
 

Tomatoes

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Dont use the R word....Be with her. Enjoy yourself. Let her make it exclusive. Relationships love and all that are not decided in an instant. They grow over time. I personally see a girl for 2 weeks before i even think about exclusive relationships....

Just cus a girl kissed you....dont need to start ringing wedding bells....
 

B-Lemond

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How, you ask?



Wait For HER to Ask You!



Go & Read The DJ Bible.
&
DAFS

This questioned has been repeated countless of times. :yes:
 

j8snx1

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hahaha there's two conflicting views here; one says I should just casually bring it up, which sounds pretty easy, and other says let the girl bring it up.

both of them have their pros and cons, but i think in the long run im going to combine both!

I'll try letting the girl bring it up while we're seeing each other, and if she isn't saying anything at all for quite some time, I'm going to use the other method and bring it up casually and in a funny tone.

thanks again fellas! i appreciate it
 

ScrewIt

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shezz is right...
anyway often asking is also about a power struggle.
But not that there's anything wrong with bringing up the topic first, the outcome can still be good. however as i said it's a power struggle, so best to leave it to the girl....in the meantime just keep it casual.
 

OrioleMagic

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I would just let her assume whatever she wants about whether you are in a relationship or not. It is obvious she digs you, why be the one to push for formal girlfriend/boyfriend status. I've always read/heard that if you f**k most women well twice, they consider you their boyfriend. The one thing I hate about being in a relationship is that women constantly want to talk about it. What is there to say: you spend time with your woman, joke around, have a good time, f**k, etc. What is there to talk about.
 

becker

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This is the most difficult part for me. I have to admit I suck at it. Just got finished with this one gal, had sex with her every day for over a month. She didn't want to be in a relationship, even though I never even brought up the topic, she said it felt like one. This just shows that relationships are basically you spending time together. The whole "making it official with a statement" is just a formality.

Second, don't think that just because you have good sex with a gal means she'll want to be in a relationship with you...
 

The_Lifter

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Cruise said:
LOL... you'd be surprised at how many couples actually fart around each other when they REALLY start to get comfortable around each other. That's the next level in relationships bro, trust me. ;)
That doesn't make it any more attractive. My ex girlfriend used to fart and burp in front of me. Instant turn off, frankly, I'd prefer to surround myself with women who have a bit of respect for themselves. If I wanted a belcher I'd have put one on my Christmas list.
 

Life-Trainee

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Woman controls sex, man controls the relationship. Relationship with you should be a prize for HER given she deserves it.
 

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speedo_meme

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j8sxn1, I can see your future....IF you ask this chick to be your girlfriend, she is going to DUMP you flat on your face. There is no conflicting views here, man. Do not ask her. You cannot love a girl who doesn't love you first. You have no other options and you're falling in love with this girl after you KISSED her? What a joke. The very thought of asking for a relationship reeks of AFC, esp. after 1 date. Get a hold of yourself...
 
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