"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
how do you make people talk about themselves a lot?
- Thread starter Marcus
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
TDOT
Don Juan
So should I be worried that you are a dangerous person?
If she says yes then say: What makes you dangerous?
If she says no say: Well what would make you dangerous?
After you are done listening to her
ask well do you think I'm dangerous.... etc. etc.
Boom... you got about 6-9 minutes of talking right there.
I-am-someone
Senior Don Juan
Communicate through actions.
Do new things, experiment with things you've already done before. Try going to a new bar you've never been before. Go to an amusementpark. Have sex for christ's sake.
If you stand still in your relationship for too long it is going to go stale and you'll lose it. Stop being such a boring prick that just wants to talk, do something.
Now, get out there and do some fun stuff with her. I know there's always one thing I can definitely invite my friends to do; doing something totally insane, fun and different.
Like taking a boom-box along with you, hiding it in some bushes and play a CD with the sound of two people having sex on it. Then just sit back and watch how people react
. Add some excitement back into your own life, which will immediatly flow into her life as well.]Originally posted by I-am-someone
Stop talking so damn much, Marcus. You don't always have to talk, you know.
Communicate through actions.
Do new things, experiment with things you've already done before. Try going to a new bar you've never been before. Go to an amusementpark. Have sex for christ's sake.
If you stand still in your relationship for too long it is going to go stale and you'll lose it. Stop being such a boring prick that just wants to talk, do something.
Now, get out there and do some fun stuff with her. I know there's always one thing I can definitely invite my friends to do; doing something totally insane, fun and different.
Like taking a boom-box along with you, hiding it in some bushes and play a CD with the sound of two people having sex on it. Then just sit back and watch how people react
thanks for the reply.
btw how the **** u calling a prick
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
I-am-someone
Senior Don Juan
I'm not just calling you a prick, I'm calling you a boring prick. Because you are, or at least have been from what I can tell.
Stop being it, and nobody will ever call you that again
.I-am-someone
Senior Don Juan
Well... yes...
If she's having a good time, she's not going to be quiet. She feels comfortable around her family. Apparently she's not comfortable around you. This may have the following reason:
You haven't even had sex. Come on, make a move, she's BEGGING for you to. She wants to have sex with you, she wants to connect on a deeper level than just talking...
Also, I think it's bad to talk too much. I don't know about other people but I get bored after talking to someone for more than a few hours in a row. I need some refreshment and I need to meet new people to talk to, or I'll get annoyed by the person I'm talking to because I just want to talk to someone else.
Instead of talking to her every time she wants to, spare your conversations. Spread them across a longer period of time.
Oh yeah, once you've had sex... things will change for the better...
But its not me who wants to talk all the time ..im fine with just doing my own thing like playing games or listening to music ..shes the one always wanting me to talk ..I think she just must like my attention or maybe im not giving her enough ...But a couple hours i doubt would be enough for her.
I-am-someone
Senior Don Juan
Don't give her all the attention she wants, make her work for it
."I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
yunghova35
Don Juan
Like everyone said STOP giving her all your time and attention. Don’t you know that NOT good, like david d says “give her the gift of missing you.” And how long have you gone out wit this chick and you haven’t had sex I mean, I swear man your 22 how old is she. I STILL want to know WHY is this girl so great you STILL have not named ONE thing that makes her so GREAT, but yet you say she is.
she "dont" smoke, take drugs , sleep around .....shes a virgin...shes very old fashioned...and wouls rather stay at home and watch a film ..insted of going to clubs...she says clubs aint what she likes...shes loves cooking...even thou we havent had sex yet ..shes a very sexual person and is always up for ideas..shes has many factirs of an old skool type women ...and i love this shyt..shes very respectable and is jsut the perfect girl to take home ..theres loads more things too