"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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How do you know if its too late?

XxprodigyxX

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alright so heres the scenario. ive known this girl for quite some time. id say were good friends, which really sucks. we share the same hobbies so i always find us together but on a more serious note since our hobby is what we both want as carreers. basically, we are both musicians. anyway, i know (as well as many others) that shes fine, and obviously im attracted to her. what i want to know is, how do you know if its too late and that you are "just a friend" to her? and how do you change that.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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mrmoe

Don Juan
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"i always find us together" "id say were good friends"

You've crossed into the friend zone big time my friend. It can be changed but it'll be really, really, really, really tough. You have to force yourself not to see her as often, hang out with other girls, don't always be available to her, etc. etc. Seems you're pretty deep into the friendship though, so best of luck to you!
 

XxprodigyxX

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i should have elaborated more on the situation. so, anyway, i see her all the time cause i help her alot with music. and she always gets me little things i guess to show appreciation. but heres the thing, shes going to a different country in about 3 weeks for work and wont be back for about 2 months. should i see her before she leaves or stay away till sometime when she gets back? i havent made a move cause the fact that itll fvck up us working together but i know its one or the other? what would you fellow DJs do?
 

Deep Dark Steel

Don Juan
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I would go see her when she leaves, but don't make a spectacle of it. Go tell her bye then leave. If she calls you while away talk to her seldomly, find some things to do, hang with other girls. In my experience rarely is it too late to change a woman's head, but it just takes a heluva lot of work to program her the way you want her and most of the time its not worth it because she's not the same woman as your lover as she was when she was your friend.
 

PRMoon

Master Don Juan
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If you're aleady friends then its probably already too late. Waiting isn't going to help your situation. I don't know if I'd blurt out my feelings for her just before she leaves the country either.

Me I'd wait till she came back to make any kind of move. But then again I would have made my intentions clear long ago. Listen to the story of her trip when she gets back, and tell her how much you were thinking about her in other ways... then pray she dosn't slap you and run off crying.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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wind20mph

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Hey, let me ask you a short question...

Do you want to befreind her ot more than that?


You oviously kissing her ass. Doing things for her so that you are her friend for life. HUH!

You find it too late because you are not doing something.
 

Luscious

Master Don Juan
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You're in the friends zone.

When you meet a girl, it's like driving on a freeway. You need to change lanes and hit the exit that is "more than friends", because once you miss that exit, you are SCREWED - you can't drive the wrong way on a freeway!

You need to find a new girl.
 
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