How do you get beyond teacher/student?

[MR109]

Alrighty...

Met my new voice (singing) teacher...

She sounded really sweet on the phone before I hired her...but the first day I met her...DAMN! HOLY CRAP!! She is FINE...

The good thing is she is 2 years younger than me...

The bad thing...I did not ask her out the first day.

One of my concerns was the fact that even though she was friendly and flirty...I did not want to mistake that with her "doing her job - which is to keep clients.

I've had 5 classes with her (once a week, give or take)...

She is coming to a theatre performance (with a girlfriend of hers) I am doing on Saturday (unrelated to the singing class)...and I also made plans with her to hook up next week (finalizing tomorrow).

But having issues, as I think I kept the invite for next weeek too "friendly"...think it was a fear of not wanting to ruin the "teaching" relationship...

eeeeek...

Any thoughts on this one?

 

[Warrior74]

How long is she going to be your teacher, can you flirt and string it along until then? I mean if you just want a pump and dump that could go horrible, if you are gonna be spinning plates how complicated will it be with her, option three is LTR. Just consider the endgame with this one first since you have a professional relationship. What's your endgame and then go from there.

 

[MR109]

I like this girl a lot...not the type of chick I would just fvck and walk away from.

I can stop taking classes with her anytime...just feel like I need to get it OUT of the "professional" relationship. Would be BIG TIME weird if I try taking it another direction, and she react badly...then still keep going to classes and such.

 

[ARrocket]

Are the lessons one-on-one? Also, are they in your home?

If yes, you have all you need here. Flirt with her pretty hardcore, and see how she responds. If it's favorably...pull out some wine, transition....

If not, you still need to flirt with her hard for a few lessons...then maybe invite her for a drink or something.

If things get weird, just fire her at that point. The key here is whether or not you value her more as a teacher or as a woman. That's something you have to decide. If it's the latter and not the former, you know what to do...just treat her like any other chick in your life (ie not a one night stand type of thing). It might take some planning and effort, but keep up the sexual tension and move things forward

 

[MR109]

Well...messed this one up.

I meet her for the one on one lessons at a studio.

I basically confirmed the plans we have for next week...wanted to set them in stone. At which point she said, "soooo....are you asking me...on a date?"

To which I said, I very cooly said "yes"...

She then back-tracked, and told me she doesn't date her clients...which to ME meant "even if I was single I would not date you".

Afterall...if the MAN OF HER DREAMS was one of her clients...and he asked her out...I HIGHLY doubt she would say, "you are totally the man of my DREAMS...but...since you are my client...I just cannot bring myself to date you..."

When she first said it, I jokingly replied with..."that's okay...I can TOTALLY stop being your client, so it is not an issue anymore..."

Then she told me she was dating someone (which is strange as she has NEVER meitoned this guy in convo)...she always gave me the impression she was single.

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeek...

So...the diss wasn;t just "I'm dating someone" - in which i may have put her on the shelf and consider maybe at a later time - it became a "no way in hell, even if I was single"...

She then said someone along the lines of how if she dates clients, then she would be out of the money...and she needs the money.

I did not take the above statement as one of being superficial and money hungry...just one of being "uncomfortable" with me asking her out...

No worries...played it cool and left it at that...

Then she confirmed that she was still coming to see my show on Saturday...

ARRRRGGGGGGGG!

Great...

So...conclusion is she only wants a professional relationship...

Oh well...


probably won't continue with her as a coach...not for a while. Think I was enjoying being around her, more than I was enjoying the singing.