silverfox
Don Juan
I’ve been with a girl for 3 ½ years. We live together there have been ups and downs throughout and the last 6 months or so have horrible. We tried to fix things up though. I told her I don’t love her like I used to but I still care about her so we wanted to see if we could rekindle things. We’ve had a better time of things of recently but I haven’t fallen back in love or anything.
The lease on our apt is up for renewal at the end of Oct so we will get a renewal notice at the end of August. When things were really bad we said if it wasn’t any better by then it would be the end of things. I feel like such a heel as I still love her as a person and friend but am just not *in love* with her anymore. I don’t want to get married, have kids or any of that. It’s not that I want to get out and start nailing loads of other women or whatnot and I’ve never cheated. I just don’t feel we are ultimately compatible. She doesn’t have many outlets or external pursuits so I feel like she makes me the sole focus of her life which means I also catch all her venting too.
She will sometimes tell me she thinks I am holding her back or she would be happier on her own. If I say the same back it becomes a big issue and I am sure if I said I wanted us to call it a day all the things she said on that subject would be forgotten.
Admittedly I am probably a frustrating character but I know she has other things which annoy her and I catch it for all those too which makes me wonder why I bother sticking around. I miss my own space, time alone and would like to have that again. I am nervous about living alone though as I’ve never done that before, I’ve always shared with someone (family, friends, girlfriend…). I used to be an AFC, now I am an AFC in an LTR.
This sucks. I went from no girlfriends for years to headfirst into an LTR and here I am. Anyone else been through this and have any advice on how to handle this? (Other than man up and grow a pair…)
The lease on our apt is up for renewal at the end of Oct so we will get a renewal notice at the end of August. When things were really bad we said if it wasn’t any better by then it would be the end of things. I feel like such a heel as I still love her as a person and friend but am just not *in love* with her anymore. I don’t want to get married, have kids or any of that. It’s not that I want to get out and start nailing loads of other women or whatnot and I’ve never cheated. I just don’t feel we are ultimately compatible. She doesn’t have many outlets or external pursuits so I feel like she makes me the sole focus of her life which means I also catch all her venting too.
She will sometimes tell me she thinks I am holding her back or she would be happier on her own. If I say the same back it becomes a big issue and I am sure if I said I wanted us to call it a day all the things she said on that subject would be forgotten.
Admittedly I am probably a frustrating character but I know she has other things which annoy her and I catch it for all those too which makes me wonder why I bother sticking around. I miss my own space, time alone and would like to have that again. I am nervous about living alone though as I’ve never done that before, I’ve always shared with someone (family, friends, girlfriend…). I used to be an AFC, now I am an AFC in an LTR.
This sucks. I went from no girlfriends for years to headfirst into an LTR and here I am. Anyone else been through this and have any advice on how to handle this? (Other than man up and grow a pair…)