How do you deal with it?

[Heizen]

Most of you all reading this are probably here because some relationship went sour, or you were tired of something in your life. So I ask you this question:

How do you deal with it?

Do you ever fully get over that one girl that drove you to come here? Is it something you can just get rid of?

 

[flexion_]

Don't worry about why we are here - worry about yourself. That pretty much sums up how you deal with it as well.

 

[ScrewIt]

look into the future and move on.
yes and yes.

 

[englishman]

getting another one can help, also time will help, I have a bit of an anecdote? if it helps, when I first came here to sosuave it was over an asian chick who had messed me about badly and then went back to her country.....I was determined to not get so f**ed up about it that i was imobelised (again), so I got me a new one! also from the same country as the other one ;-) anyway eventually she to went back and we stayed in touch..a few months later I went there (korea) to see chick #2 and #1 heard through the grapvine I was there....1st contact in a year since she f**ed me over.......anyway we met in Seoul, she was still up to her usuall ****y tricks and I knew that it would be same BS as before...so I shagged her silly and the next day when she started her ****! I had the balls this time to tell her to go and F*ck herself............ was a great feeling man, I was back in the drivers seat and I would never , nevver in a million years have expected to have that opportunity to be able to do that....
So the long and short of it is....push yourself.......move on....grow some balls.....talk to your men friends and it will be ok in time....good luck bro.....

 

[CoRVeTTe6699]

how do u deal with it? you say FCUK it and u find another girl. no girl is worth your trouble

 

[christz]

its a headache and it can effect you mentally and physically

mentally because you like everybody else may think "i'll never find another one like her" but you can and you will because there are plenty out there with the same personality traits that you like

and physically because your loseing sleep your not eating etc..

time heals everything, but to get over it faster you gotta understand its over and remembering about the good stuff isn't gonna help either.

put it to the back of your mind take what you learned and move onto the next one. that's all you can do. at least that's why i TRY to do. But even the shortest relationships with the right person are hard to forget.

 

[englishman]

think of the things that you didnt like about her and focus on those.....give it 6 months and youll be over the worst of it....

 

[AFK Protector]

If she's hurt you bad, definitely focus on those things. However, don't let that feeling you get thinking about those things affect other areas of your life and your relationships withother people. She doesn't deserve that much time on your mind.

 

[NewMan]

One day at a time.

This will not kill you. This will make you stronger.

Look to the future not the past.

Think about it. You have learnt from this experience have you not? you are now a better man because of it.

Hurt and pain are part of the human experience. Looking back on it - I am glad I went through what I did. It has made me a better person - a stronger person.

Does it still hurt?

Yes. There are times when the pain comes. There are times when I think about her - what she's doing and the times we had together.

To be honest there is not a day that goes by without me thinking about her.

But would I change it? no.

I would do it over again.

The person I am today, the life I lead today - is better than it was with her.

I strive to become better - and I know one day that I will get what I'm looking for.

In the meantime - I will have patience - and I will grow as a man.

 

[Desdinova]

It all depends on how long you were with her and what investments you put into the relationship. If you were just dating, it'll be much easier to get over than if you were living with her, or even married.

This is how I dealt with it (I was living with her)

I took a week off work and just mourned. I cried my eyes out. Then, I started to repeatedly tell myself it was over.

One week after she was gone, I rebounded. I ended up with a posessive woman and dated her for a few days. I didn't really like her and she wasn't that good looking. She provided comfort that I sorta needed. She told me, "You have a good job, you're good looking, and you can have any woman you want." I realized she was right, so I dumped her.

I cut all contact with my ex and worked on being single again. That's how I ended up here.

I dated many women, and eventually my ex wanted to come back to me. So, she met up at the bar with some mutual friends and waited for me to come and talk to her. I was too busy flirting and making out with the women in the bar to be bothered with her. She ended up leaving. I didn't care.

 

[Desdinova]

Now with that said, don't do like Desdinova and get a rebound woman that is really beneath you. Like him, you will probably come to the realization that you really deserve better, and you will end up hurting her when you dump her.

The great thing about what I did was I got a sense of moving on. I began dating other women right away. Either way you look at it, whether your rebounding or not, if you don't like the woman you're going to get rid of her and possibly hurt her feelings. If you stay with her to prevent hurting her feelings, you're going to end up miserable. Time heals the pain from a breakup.

I highly suggest rebounding after a LTR has ended. It helps you realize that you're on a new path of life.