"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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How do you become a generally smarter, more informed, more aware, and better person?

apocalypse later

Don Juan
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Yeah, this sounds like a dumb question. But this past weekend, I stayed at my girlfriend's house with her family. One of her sister's boyfriends was around as well. He really made me realize how ****ing limited I am as a person.

This guy, at 26, could literally talk about EVERYTHING. Not only did he know law like the back of his hand (he goes to law school), but there literally was not one thing he didn't have a comment on. He knew something interesting or funny about every subject, he could crack a joke about anything, and he was beyond current on current events. He talked to everyone as young as 19 (me and my girlfriend) to as old as 80 (my gf's grandfather) with eloquence. There was never an awkward moment, never a pause where he had to stop and say that he didn't know anything about something, and never a stretch where he wasn't laughing.

This guy was definitely "that guy" that you see at the center of every single party, always talking to someone and always having fun. He's the one who somehow comes out of a movie and memorizes every funny line. He's the one who remembers faces, inside jokes, and details that few others can. He's the one everyone respects and looks up to, or it's what I saw at least.

How does one become like this? It might just be embedded within his personality or something. I don't want to "be him", per se, but how do you improve yourself to have some of these traits?


I have a lot of these traits already. I'm very good socially, but I'm hardly ever the guy who walks in the door and instantly has four people who are listening attentively to him. I'm intelligent, good looking, and I dress well. But I'm just not this guy with an explosive personality who "always" knows what to say, how to say it, and when to say it to get a laugh.

Here are some last second things I also noticed about him:

-He had to have watched a lot of movies and TV. Not only did he seem to know something about every TV show we watched, but he also noticed the intricate tendencies of the cooks on the Food Network. He could remember quotes from South Park in seasons way back, down to the very line and method of delivery. Oh, and his facebook is filled with favorite comedians and comedy movies.

-He must read a lot, and quite a variety. He seemed to know a lot about the financial situations of a ton of Fortune 500 companies. He often referenced books he's read as well.

-He made observations, all the time, about everything. Oftentimes, they were just funny, other times, they were analytical.

I'm not trying to downplay myself, that I'm not intelligent or funny. It's just that I can't believe this guy's personality. He could interest a grandfather enough to pick up a video game or provoke a small child to open up a law textbook, while making them laugh hysterically at the same time.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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IKO69

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Probably personality. Most of the people I know who went to Law School were charasmatic people who were intelligent (After all you have to be to go to and pass Law School). Still, I'm sure he didn't just wake up one day and was like that...he probably observed and read a lot as you mentioned.

Even if you are born with 'gifts', you still have to bring them out. Not everyone can be like this person you know, but everyone can strive to improve themselves by working on their weak areas.
 

j-flex

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maybe you are in love with him and thats why you see him so perfect.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Bible_Belt

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Everyone I met at law school was pretty dorky and generally had low social intelligence, although they were all very bright. You only saw one side of him, and he might have other raging flaws. The behavior you describe sounds like the manic high side of bipolar disorder, or well-medicated ADHD. He is probably on Ritalin. Some law students use it recreationally and a lot of others go get certified as having ADHD so that the university will give them time and a half on tests. btw, grades are on a curve; it's all a competition, so this tactic is really popular. I was going to go get certified as having attention deficit disorder, but it was a long and involved process, and I lost interest.

If you want to be more well-read, the Internet is an easy place to get a lot for free. Check Google news daily and use google itself to answer questions when you have them. wikipedia is not the most respected academic source, but most people are pretty ignorant about most things, so skimming a wiki article in a few seconds separates you from most people very quickly. As for humor, you could try to get into comedy and watching the routines of comedians, like that guy probably did.
 

Maxtro

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Bible_Belt said:
I was going to go get certified as having attention deficit disorder, but it was a long and involved process, and I lost interest.
LOL does anybody else see the irony in that :crackup:
 

Desert Fox

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Maxtro said:
LOL does anybody else see the irony in that :crackup:
hahahahaahahahahahah nice catch Maxtro.

Bible belt, you're retarded bro!
 

Desert Fox

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by the way, to become "well read" you just gotta talk to a lot of people. Be CURIOUS. And LOOK UP SH1T YOU DON'T KNOW. Like most people read the paper and see a word they don't know and skim right over. GO LOOK IT UP. Newspapers give you the news in the form that most retarded people can have the attention span to read...wider audience. It's up to you to go deeper if an article interests you or something.

With the internet these days, there's really no excuse not to.

Again, it helps just to talk to other people and share opinions.
 

Yahooey

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Desert Fox said:
by the way, to become "well read" you just gotta talk to a lot of people. Be CURIOUS. And LOOK UP SH1T YOU DON'T KNOW. Like most people read the paper and see a word they don't know and skim right over. GO LOOK IT UP. Newspapers give you the news in the form that most retarded people can have the attention span to read...wider audience. It's up to you to go deeper if an article interests you or something.

With the internet these days, there's really no excuse not to.

Again, it helps just to talk to other people and share opinions.
Agreed^.

You need to be curious and have a genuine desire to satisfy your curiosity. Use this both in your reading (Desert Fox's comments) and in your conversations with people.

One of the basic rules on being a good conversationalist is to be genuinely interested in what the other person has to say. People love to talk about themselves. Their jobs are often a favorite subject and they are subject matter experts in their professions. Using this you can appear knowledgeable as you are building up your knowledge. For example, you have spoken to an engineer about his work and you now meet another engineer. By exploring a subject you remember from your previous conversation, you will start him speaking, show you know something about the subject (even if it very little) and further your knowledge.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

Read more...

Quiksilver

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No offense, but from the description you gave, he sounds a little fake to me. I know people who know a little bit about everything, but when you dig too deep they change the conversation since they only know surface knowledge.

The guy I know like that is great for talking to, but I wouldn't want to hang out with him... He's fake and tries to impress people. If you really get into the nitty gritty with him, he doesn't know MUCH about anything.

To be honest, your friend sounds like a Talker. Personally I like to hang out with Doers, so he wouldn't be my first choice of friend... from the description you gave of course.

--

Spend some more time around him and he'll reveal his true colors.

As for how you get that 'knowledgeable', its pretty simple...

1. be social. you have to go out a lot and develop social skills.
2. read 2 different newspapers a day. you can learn a lot of 'surface knowledge' by reading the papers.
3. buy two or three different magazines each week on different subjects(women, cars, random sports, commerce, etc) and read them.

within the year, you'll be "that guy" who can talk about everything. Doesn't mean your smart, it just means you spend your time learning 'just enough' to impress people.

cheers bro
 

MrNotebook

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Most of what this guy sounds like is flattery to me. When I see people like that I silently laugh because if you look closely you'll notice most of what they're made up of is all about impressing others, or starving for attention.

Sounds like he possibly gets most of his security from being the center of attention. What's wrong with being cool, calm and collected? If a person knows bulks of information, there is no impending need to broadcast it to the world. Like they say, silence is golden.

Its rare to come accross a person that knows how to hold thier tongue. For me I feel more content being able to control my tongue and not feel so obliged to 'talk about everything". Its more attractive than just blurting at the mouth.

Here is a quote that helps keep me in check...

"There is the type of man who speaks because he has something to say, and there is the man who speaks because he has to say something."
 
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