How do you as a DJ deal with things like this?

[gtownjuan]

This shyt is confusing to me since I was interacting an online site and though i could ACTUALLY find an interesting partner. So i add some people and try to send the ones i find interesting a little message to initiate contact. What can i do / change to actually make a worth wild friend online through a first message? You help is needed guys...



--- gtownjuan wrote:

It's amazing how people on hi5 "stay connected. They add you, check up on you now and again then constantly not tell you one thing. Its shocks me how people care for people these days, especially the perfect ones. But its all good cause their got all these anonymous internet guys complementing them, cough cough. 'Floating in heaven' is great but when you come down remember the little people. Peace.

--- Adriana wrote:

Hmmm... interesting comment. I must say that i dont no how to answer u but u couldnt have said it any better. However, im jus a girl trying to make it in this life...im not perfect, im jus like 1 of the little people. I like it when i hear frm my friends... the anonymous comments dont flatter me... they actually annoy me sometimes except when its from a friend or some 1 i've connected with.

--- Adriana also wrote: (in a second message)
btw... how old r u? if u dont mind me asking.

 

[MotownMack]

Well, are we to assume that's the first message you sent listed at the top?

Most of my dating has originated online in the last year. I am not sure what kind of site this is, but on dating sites I am pretty well versed and more or less use the following format.

1) Start by saying something humorous, witty won't hurt either. Usually an observation about their profile, pictures of whatever.
2) Keep it light. That message you send looks really heavy for initial conversation.
3) The b!tch shield is up in the online world just like it is in real life. I convey no interest beyond light conversation originally. After getting to know girls, they later told me that this reason was pretty much why they responded to my mail as opposed to the hundreds of others they delete.
4) Keep the messages pretty short, no more than a paragraph. But not so short they leave nothing to respond to ("hey, wanna chat sometime?" or "What's up?" are classic examples of thoughtless messages).
5) If it's online dating we're talking about, that actually goes more on looks than any other form of dating, so keep that in mind. All they have is a picture, no idea of body language, etc. A good message can definitely help, but the looks are what's most likely to make or break you.

Best of luck.

 

[The August Sky]

guy above had good points as far as "the space" goes which is like what ur using im assuming?

on first message if you are sending it make reference of something they like..or a job they have held..or a place theyve been. make reference to that and make a social statement that youve been there too...say what you thought of it..asked what they thought of it. just find common ground. best msgs ive had luck with are very simple...the simpler the better...NO paragraph form.

use choppy grammar but dont mistake choppy for sloppy. my writing now is "whatever internet free time" style writing...mimic something along the lines of what im doing. it should just flow..if your finding you have to force it move away from comp and make another effort. try to write a msg after uve been out socializing and are having a good day..youll be in the social mindset still and it should flow then.

also i end it with a friendly/odd way like "well thats all for now" or "lol and that id be it"---is perfect if you write more of a thought that goes on in your head like you see her picture of someplace/her doing something..just an obsevation youve made and type that thought out as long as its proper..sounds quirky and its not really a conversation opener but chicks get bombarded with **** from dudes if theyre profiles arnt private. i know for a fact...online dating has similarities to the openers that you can do at a club/bar.....be unique. but manage it not to be uniquely weird...and u should do fine. as long af u have good pics and not any of that anime b.s. on ur page with dragons and swords and **** chicks hate that

 

[The August Sky]

oh and your 17...bang freshman dude. if u want a partner sure have at it...but its most likely puppy love. enjoy it while u can its not always as easy as u have it now...


peace

 

[xdreamz]

dude that's the green light man, you should go head and talk to her.

 

[MotownMack]

i know for a fact...online dating has similarities to the openers that you can do at a club/bar.....be unique.

This is absolutely true. The openers themselves don't have to be much different than anything you'd use in bar/club/mall-a joke or comment about something that's going on at the time, only in this case, you've got a little more time to think about what you're going to say, fewer distractions for her, and no need to worry about your own courage or body language. I'd say that's one of the few, but very good advantages that online DJing offers.

One other small note, in regard to Online dating mirroring real life. Girls will approach a little more, but some still will not. I see girls have viewed my profile and didn't message, or maybe they never viewed it-but when I message them, they sometimes respond positively. They'd obviously seen me, they just weren't gonna approach. So, much like real life, assume nothing about her type, and just for it.

 

[gtownjuan]

hey much thanks guys. I had no idea of how to break the ice online. So i was trying the whole c&f thing while qualifying but from what you guys have said, i try a more casual approach.

I'll sure make sure to follow up on this girl who is on hi5 by the way. Although you have covered the initial icebreaker, how do you follow up? What would be a response to her? Should i lie about my age since it isn't on my profile there or just be honest and see what follows.