I have recently decided that the first thing I need to do to get a girl is tease her. I realized this both by experience and by reading stuff from this site. Teasing establishes your confidence, shows you don't think she is worth more than you, and breaks the barrier of formality to allow for a personal relationship.
However, I have very little idea of how to do it. Recently I have had some experience teasing girls, and when I have pulled it off it has definately broken the barrier of formality at least. But I can't control when this is going to happen. Some girls seem to almost bring it on, and some girls are impossible to start with.
Furthermore, I find that the girls I am able to tease usually have boyfriends. This makes a lot of sense, because girls which are able to be teased are more confident, probably because they have boyfriends.
Which brings me to my second problem. I find it most easy to talk to girls who have boyfriends. They are more confident, and confident people are more enjoyable and easier to talk to. But I want to talk to girls without boyfriends, so this doesn't help me.
Finally, a specific case: There is a girl in my philosophy class who is very attractive and when I talked to her I thought she seemed interesting. The past few times I have talked to her, however, I have not been able to break that barrier of formality. I know what I am suppose to try to do, all the DJ techniques, but the only one I am able to do is focus the conversation on her, which is really not enough.
Furthermore, every time I talk to her I have to approach her or initiate the conversation, which is usually the case for someone you don't know that well. But obviously this makes me seem less of a catch because I have to constantly approach her.
So here are my questions:
How do you purposefully direct a conversation with a girl towards teasing? How do you tease an unconfident girl? How do you break the barrier of formality with an unconfident girl? How do you get to know a girl without seeming obsessed with her by constantly approaching? How do you employ DJ skills on a girl in your class?
One possible solution, of course, would be to be the class clown or the life of the class. Then you could demonstrate your confidence and social power in her view. However, I'm not that kind of person.
I'm kind of getting fed up with trying to get girls which I know in some context, and thinking about just going out and doing cold approaches. But I know that this is much more likely to fail. So what do I do? What am I doing wrong?
However, I have very little idea of how to do it. Recently I have had some experience teasing girls, and when I have pulled it off it has definately broken the barrier of formality at least. But I can't control when this is going to happen. Some girls seem to almost bring it on, and some girls are impossible to start with.
Furthermore, I find that the girls I am able to tease usually have boyfriends. This makes a lot of sense, because girls which are able to be teased are more confident, probably because they have boyfriends.
Which brings me to my second problem. I find it most easy to talk to girls who have boyfriends. They are more confident, and confident people are more enjoyable and easier to talk to. But I want to talk to girls without boyfriends, so this doesn't help me.
Finally, a specific case: There is a girl in my philosophy class who is very attractive and when I talked to her I thought she seemed interesting. The past few times I have talked to her, however, I have not been able to break that barrier of formality. I know what I am suppose to try to do, all the DJ techniques, but the only one I am able to do is focus the conversation on her, which is really not enough.
Furthermore, every time I talk to her I have to approach her or initiate the conversation, which is usually the case for someone you don't know that well. But obviously this makes me seem less of a catch because I have to constantly approach her.
So here are my questions:
How do you purposefully direct a conversation with a girl towards teasing? How do you tease an unconfident girl? How do you break the barrier of formality with an unconfident girl? How do you get to know a girl without seeming obsessed with her by constantly approaching? How do you employ DJ skills on a girl in your class?
One possible solution, of course, would be to be the class clown or the life of the class. Then you could demonstrate your confidence and social power in her view. However, I'm not that kind of person.
I'm kind of getting fed up with trying to get girls which I know in some context, and thinking about just going out and doing cold approaches. But I know that this is much more likely to fail. So what do I do? What am I doing wrong?
. Just focus on having fun and you'll go far.