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How do I talk to a girl a few times without seeming overly interested?

Hi Jol

Don Juan
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College classes seem to be a good place to pick up girls, but my problem is that I have to talk to these girls more than once in order to get to know them. That means I have to keep initiating conversations with them. This is especially a problem in my philosophy class in which everyone sits scattered throughout the room. If you sit next to someone you are doing it purposefully, not by chance.

I know, of course, that there is nothing wrong with signaling a woman that you are interested, but this should only be after you have established some sort of attraction on her part towards you. I can't really do that quickly. In a way it seems like there is no way out. If I don't talk to her she can't get more attracted to me, but if I keep talking to her and she is not attracted to me I am going to seem like a loser or obsessed or something.

One solution would be to establish a connection or attaction quickly. I just can't figure out how to do this, however. I mean, it is possible with some girls, but not with others. Usually the girls it is possible with are confident, and usually this is because they have boyfriends.
 

Tell her a little about yourself, but not too much. Maintain some mystery. Give her something to think about and wonder about when she's at home.

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Iamnotacrook

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College classes seem to be a good place to pick up girls, but my problem is that I have to talk to these girls more than once in order to get to know them.
GASP!! hahah ;)

That means I have to keep initiating conversations with them.
:crackup:

This is especially a problem in my philosophy class in which everyone sits scattered throughout the room. If you sit next to someone you are doing it purposefully, not by chance.
Here's what you do... sit down next to her and initiate flirting, not "conversation". You know? Damn... if you don't do what you want to do when you want to do it, that's where you become AFC. Don't let her think you're a little wussie. If you have such low confidence, maybe you should improve whatever it is you think is a flaw. I don't support faked confidence.

I know, of course, that there is nothing wrong with signaling a woman that you are interested, but this should only be after you have established some sort of attraction on her part towards you. I can't really do that quickly. In a way it seems like there is no way out. If I don't talk to her she can't get more attracted to me, but if I keep talking to her and she is not attracted to me I am going to seem like a loser or obsessed or something.
If you keep talking her and she tells you to **** off, leave it alone. Until then, keep gaming her.

One solution would be to establish a connection or attaction quickly.
You are bordering on manipulation, which is acceptable on this site but not in my own views...

carry on
 

WhitePimp

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I've started to really not like the idea of dating classmates...it's a great place to meet girls definitely but I just don't like having to see a girl every damn time I go to class. I guess I just like seeing the girl on my own terms.

In the past I would just talk before or after class or in between when I could and just ask if she wants to get together outside of class. Or when you pass each other outside of class just chat for a bit and do it there.
 

Hi Jol

Don Juan
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Re: Re: How do I talk to a girl a few times without seeming overly interested?

Originally posted by Iamnotacrook Here's what you do... sit down next to her and initiate flirting, not "conversation".
I think that makes sense, but how do I do that? How to I turn talking from conversation into flirting?
 

Iamnotacrook

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Easy. Don't start a boring conversation. Now, in the case you've already had conversations with particular girls, continue to treat them in this way until you can have your interest re-sparked, then go straight to attraction. Keep in mind, it's hard to go from everyday conversation to flirting, that's why you flirt from the start.

let's recap...

attraction >leads to> flirting
conversation >> conversation

With new girls, don't converse, interact. You like them. There is nothing wrong with possibly liking them. You don't have to dance around the subject.

Get this. When I make the eye contact with the intrigued smile(smile with the eyes), I always get the second look and/or prolonged eye contact, in which case I'll raise my eyebrows, maybe tilt my head up.

Bam. Instant attraction. Now, she knows I'm interested, and will check me out, nothing wrong with checking each other out. Most likely, she will somehow greet me back.

Now, flirting is inevitable. No matter what the situation, when you talk to this girl, there is attraction. You have shown yourself at your best.

When you try to dance around the subject, it is not attractive. You've shown yourself at your most insecure point. That means you'll have to change gradually from loser to gangster in the minds of these poor, defenseless ladies. This takes time and effort. That's why people hate the friend zone

and why so many people on this site are quick to shout "NEXT" because their game isn't tight enough...
 
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