You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
TheWolfMan said:Dude, I'm gonna have to agree with HB 9.5 on the whole "idiot" thing...if the shoe fits wear it. Anyway you screwed up, but it's salvageable if you want to, it might be better just nexting her, as one of the other posters said you guys have a communication issue. This chick is lost and you refuse to get her directions and ignore her? The hell is wrong with you boy? Listen, I'm all about trying to maintain control and playfully tease girls that one talks to, but you gotta learn there's a time and place for that sort of thing. I mean you know this chick is sensitive right? Keep that in the back of you're head when you're texting her, once you know her better and she gets more comfortable then she will pick up on you're humor and or teasing. The second thing you did wrong was take her texts back as being serious, it sounded like she was just teasing you back with the smiley face at the end. Sounds like you got a little bit of "you can dish it out, but you can't take it" sort of thing goin on there. I'm not saying to bow down to the girl, but learn when to stand your ground and when to give in. This situation was not one of the those times. Tough call on the NC thing, if you guys haven't talked yet, I'd hit her up with with something along the lines of what DonJuanabe said, but keep it playful.
You're right man. I'm going to make sure we go out this week 100%.ckdon said:dude what the hell. do not listen to any of these no contact boasters.
TEXT/CALL HER ASAP AND SET UP A DATE ASAP. DO NOT LOSE HER if she has shown so much interest. ive been in this situation before.
if you play ur cards right, she's a keeper man.
you are acting like a jerk it seems. the whole "why are you so mean to me and the you dont have to hurt my feelings" thing proves that she has feelings for you and cares and when in return you dont, she feels hurt and ourtighr said it to you.
arrange a date with her asap man.
So she called me an idiot once, while she was panicking alone in another state at night while it was raining, means I never talk to her?Slickster said:"I told you to call idiot" = It's over! Never talk to her again.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Yeah, that's cool and all, but you would be wasting time. Unless you, of course, have the power to turn back the hands of time... Then by all means, keep using your time on her.Piers Nivens said:I have great healing skills (i..e gettting back on track).