how do i get this girl to go out with me

[tom121]

how do i get this girl to go out (as a date) with me

so i met this girl at high school, we actually met during a graduation car wash (to raise funds for our prom) anyway we had a lot of fun together at prom (we went to playdium - a great place to play video games)

I never asked for her email/phone during that time so we lost contact after we graduated

now it's been about 6 months, she found me on "hi5.com" she said

Hey Tom!!
...i don't think you remember me but it's me XXX...from XXX!
i am just sendin'u a message to see how ur holdin' up and how is life after grad??
add me on msn so we can talk!!
if u dont' dat's kewl too!
bye for now XXX

so lately we've been talking about what we are up to and stuff

now valentine time is nearby, she told me she is single, I want to ask her to this rave, since she likes to dance and never been to a rave before. I told her about me having a spare ticket (which I was gonna sell it to one of my male friend) and he can't go.. so she asked me how much is it, I told her the price then she said she'll try to get some money,,,

now she sounded like she won't be going since it's near valentines day or she doesn't have a job right now (in college, well both of us)


so I wanna know how to ask her to go? perhaps ask her to go with me as a date so it's free? I try to keep my cool not showing desperate and forcing her to go...

 

[Joe The Homophobe]

read the DJ Bible kid!

 

[Nightspark]

well technically dude u have already asked her out... no seriously look at what u just posted u really did ask her out to come to the rave and what not.... all u do is wait i guess and it's urr cash and choice if u wanna take her for free to the rave

 

[stalluproar]

The more you hesitate, the lesser your chances are.

 

[tom121]

kid??

well i ASKED her, not ASKED in a going on a date

so stalluproar, I have to get an answer from her quickly and i will next her?

 

[stalluproar]

What I mean the more you put this issue in limbo, the less attractive she will see you. If she is payinig, still treat it as a fun time with her. I think it is best for her to come up with the dough or just have fun with going alone or with another friend. To be honest, to get to the next level, I rather do something where I can get to know her and pull more C&F.

 

[tom121]

yeah i agree, but looks like i have to start looking for someone or going alone

 

[Desdinova]

There's nothing wrong with going out alone. Use your personality to make temporary friends there. That's what I do when I go out alone.

As for this chick, a rave isn't a great 1st date. Take her out for coffee so you can catch up. If it goes well, take her out somewhere fun after you're done coffee so you can get some kino in.

 

[tom121]

here's a testimonial she posted on hi5 for me

Tom is a sweet heart! we met @ our grad car wash and i was so surprised dat we had never met durin' skul in the past yrs dat we went there! n-e way i am gald we became frinds in those last couple of months! HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY!!! (i know iknow it's belated, but hey @ least i wished u ;-) ) like i said before sweet guy & very down to earth! Rolie = )

she doesn't talk slangish in real life

here's a NORMAL version

Tom is a sweet heart! we met at our graduation car wash and I was so suprised that we had never met during school in the past years that we went there! anyway I am glad we became friends in those last couple of months! happy 19th birthday!!! (I know it's too late, but hey at least I wished you ;-) ) like I said before sweet guy & very down to earth! Rolie = )

 

[tom121]

by the way, I use to like one of her friend, after I told her I liked her, she wanted to be friend so I ignored her...

plus her other friends are mostly have bf so my chances are not so big around her group of friends either

 

[Nightspark]

i think yeah you should forget hte Rave night idea, because like Desdinova said it's not a good 1st date venue! best to take her out before the rave idea happens... oh and make sure u give the idea that it is a date and not some friendly hang out session ... kino and whatnot you'll need to do on that date ...

all the best man!

 

[belividere]

well you did ask her out. For your own sake then just ask her to go as your date to the rave instead of just going. That is the only real way of actual knowing were you stand with her. I wont even begin to pretend like I have any idea what a 19 yr. old girls testimonial on a website means either. Honestly you telling her friend that you like her could have been a bad thing. I don't know the circumstances of the event but if you gushed out your heart to her than it is likely that the girl you want now knows about it. This could mean a lot of things I am sure; the 2 that pop into my head (albeit as a logical male) are either that a) You open up to quickly; she might want the attention that you will be willing to give her based on past experiences, or that b) she saw your admiration for her friend (which her friend undoubtably amplified) and will not do anything because of it. To test if a) is her option is a bit tricky, but picking up on q's typically of attention wh0res is most likely sufficient. For picking up on b) it would be likely that she would bring up her friend and your relationship. Again depending on the circumstances you can work this to your advantage.

Given that none of us really know the situation between you and her and you and her friend it is illogical to try to make a call on what is best to do. At least in my opinion. I would think the best bet for you would be to just clarify beforehand your intent. Let her know that you want her as a date and not a buddy at the rave. Dont end up pulling a "Casper", sorry but that is the last time/story/movie that I have heard regarding raves.

 

[tom121]

aw sheet

i asked her a movie "white noise" on saturday night

she asked me if her twin sister could come

i said yes,, jeeez

and no I wont have a 3some with them

seems like she treated me as a friend, bah, who knows maybe i'll have a chance with her other friends

 

[tom121]

no?

 

[tom121]

well nevermind, I just saw her online on msn, then went offline quickly

not even a phone call

next

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Originally posted by tom121
well nevermind, I just saw her online on msn, then went offline quickly

not even a phone call

next

"next"?

More like "NEXT!"

 

[tom121]

well, we didn't even go out, she called me that one of her friend can't come, so she won't, why won't she and her twin sister come with me? obviously they make out a excuse that they didn't thought through, wow just because one of you can't show up, then you don't have to show up

MSN -> "msg: nice excuse you gave me, now you never thought that you and your twin sister could come, just without your friend and no movie? well this will be the last message you get from me, good bye" -> "delete" -> "block"

oh btw

she called me, i didn't hear it, then I called her back "hello? who is this? *she: is this tom? *me: yeah *she: it's me (name) *me: heeeyyy (in a long smooth tone) *she: sorry i can't come tonight, blah blah because my frend can't come *me: oh ok *she: well MAYBE next time okay? bye *me: (0hangs up)

 

[tom121]

lol i feel dumb

today i called her, at first she didn't recognize my voice and I thought I called the wrong number

I was like pissed off and **** for her pretending not knowning who I am (I got the number from call id) so anyway 5 minutes later, she called and said she was so sorry x4 times and we talked for about 10 minutes

well the movie / rave is not an option

 

[bud_2005]

That's the stupidest excuse I've ever heard (I can't go with you because my friend can't come).