How do I get over my fear of conflicts?

[The Pedantical]

I know this isn't directly related to dating, but I think that it has something to do with why at 22 I've never managed to have a single date even though I'm talk to girls often. They always have an excuse not to go out with me when I ask them, for some reason.

Anyway... what I've noticed is that I'm absolutely terrified of conflicts. When someone raises his voice at me or dissaproves of something I said or did, it paralyzes me with fear and I become unable to answer to them or defend myself. When I was in high school, people always picked on me because they knew that I would never fight back or answer to them.

And now it's still like that. Even today whenever someone is mad at me I completely panic. If I'm waiting in line or something and I accidentally block someone's passage and he tells me to move off his way or something like that, I just gasp and I don't know how to react. It's like an automatic reaction or something and I can't seem to be getting away from it, it's always there.

Then I also have the impression that I'm always trying to make friends in any way I can. Like, un the university I'm always asking the teacher questions after class just for an opportunity to talk to someone. Usually, I just ask questions about things I already know and stuff... and when they lose their patience and told me they have to hurry and can't answer me, I feel like my world is collapsing and I'm terrified that I may have angered them and that they won't want to talk to me again.

I don't know what you guys think, but personally I believe this is a big reason why I've never been able to get girls interested in me no matter how much I tired...

Anyone has an idea how I could get over this? I've been like this all my life... even back in kindergarten it was the exact same thing. Whenever another student or a teacher or whoever was mad at me or raised their voice in front of me, my heart would just start beating like mad and I would be panting and sweating and unable to do anything...

 

[Julian]

you are the omega male, the lowest on the chain of command. You were born to be bullied and taken advantage of.

just grow some balls and stand up for yourself.

if someone raises their voice at you, then cool and calmly look them dead in the face and say "dont raise your voice to me, son". say this with a tone of authority and they will step down.

you need some serious help bro. you gasp when someone tells u to move? just say "excuse me" and if they're a d1ck about it then say "excuse me..no need to be a d1ck about it".

I dunno what else to tell u ive always been the complete opposite of you. Just dont submit to anyone. the only way for you break out of this is to do the exact opposite of what you would normally do, even if its to an extreme.

 

[Egoist]

Originally posted by Julian
ook them dead in the face and say "dont raise your voice to me, son". say this with a tone of authority and they will step down.

:crackup:

wow..

shouldn't you be in the high school forum, SON? :crackup: