Do search for donpepot and Jariel.
I will try to repost the link by Donpepot, as he has an excellent post on getting the ex back. I believe the Donpepot Post is pure gold if you want to regain that girl who dumped you.
I would like to mention that both these posts are designed to get someone back who dumped you.
Since you were dumper, adjust your approach a bit, but don't come back too strong...it show your desperate and has lost your intrinsic value.
I found this on another site, it is designed for getting someback who dumped you, so you will have to adjust a little. I would start on step 2: It is milder as compared to the Donpepot post.
So you want your ex back - tips, do's, and don'ts!
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So your love has left, and you want him or her back...
If you're reading this, you've probably already tried the begging, pleading, and emotional cries for mercy - and been soundly rejected. So some of your friendly moderators and royal members have gotten together to try to compile a "now where do I go from here, and why won't he/she listen to me?" tips and advice - with explanations as to WHY you're being advised to take these steps. Hopefully it'll give some of you a better handle on what your exes might be thinking and feeling - and why what you've tried simply hasn't worked.
Important: This is assuming there's no third party waiting in the wings and you've heard the "I need space," "I think maybe we should date other people," or "I don't know if this is going to work out," or other "iffy" statements that imply they're questioning their feelings and/or feelings about being in a relationship... or you've had indications from other sources that your ex is not so happy with their decision.
Let's start with why begging and pleading for another chance doesn't work. Ok, it might work once or twice, but you know why? It's because you've administered a heavy dose of guilt, and chances are said ex still has feelings for you - and caved under the pressure. Now, if you've ever been guilted into doing something, you know you're not going into it wholeheartedly, in a sense it's emotional blackmail, albeit unintentional, and it leads to resentment just waiting to blossom in the first conflict that comes after. I know, you THINK you're just letting them know how much they mean to you. However, what's heard is "you're breaking my heart, you're hurting me incredibly, this person who loves you so!" Always, always, always try and think a step ahead - if you needed a break from a relationship for some reason and still had feelings for someone, how would this make you feel? Yep, approximately an inch tall and the lowest life form on the planet. Needless to say, this is NOT a good beginning to trying to rekindle a romantic relationship!
Step one - ok, you've all heard it, seen it advised, and wondered how the heck it helps when you're thinking you need to be around to remind your love of all the good times you've shared and how much they mean to you. Yep, the dreaded "no contact" rule. (Note: if no contact isn't completely possible due to work/school situation or shared friends, skip on to step 2 ) The reasoning that you need to remind your ex of your presence? First error in judgement. The hard fact is, you have to be noticeably "not there" for your ex to MISS you. The last thing someone who may rethink things wants is someone hounding their footsteps trying to influence them. The first thing they're gonna miss, assuming you guys have been together more than a few weeks, is that "person being around to share things with" that they've grown accustomed to. After you've been in a relationship for a while, think about it - when you've had a bad day at work, or done really great on a test, gotten a part in a play, a job promotion - the instinct is to pick up the phone and call that person to share it! That needs no reminder, and THAT is what you want working in your favor. You want habit and that emotional "sharing" bond working FOR you here, rather than giving your ex ammunition to stay strong against you.
Now, someone who is REALLY sure they're through - this may be the end of the road. There ARE no guarantees. You can't make someone love you if they truly don't. However, what you CAN do is to weigh the odds in your favor assuming there's some uncertainty, and tailor your actions to make them want to reconsider. If you think you're actually letting them talk themselves into it - you're absolutely right! But this way it's totally their decision - and the one person they can't hold out against forever is themselves!
Ok, now during this "no contact from you" phase - make SURE you stay BUSY. Bear in mind if/when your ex does get in touch with you - what kind of person do you want them to find at the other end of the phone, message, email, or "chance" meeting? A depressed, broken, morose husk of a person? Or that confident person they've had fun with and were attracted to? If you've seen problems in yourself that contributed to the breakup originally? Now is the time to get off your butt (mentally) and work on them! Use the time to make yourself someone you're happy with, someone you know is attractive, and yes, if you're up to it, even go out on some casual dates, or at the least, hang out with friends. A teasing grin is WAY more attractive than a morose frown or scowl - and how you think of yourself tends to show through any act you can put on.
Worst case, since it's not guaranteed - you'll be taking active steps to heal from the breakup and prepare yourself for a new relationship - and even best case - going BACK into a relationship, you want to do it as a whole, complete person. This no contact phase is likely to be one of the HARDEST things you ever have to do. If you feel yourself weakening - visit websites, call a friend, go for a walk, work out, ANYTHING. But try not to give in - or you'll have to start this step ALL OVER again. Now if knowing that isn't incentive, I dunno what is!
