"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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How do I friend-zone a coworker?

Uncharted

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So there is a girl at work that is really into me. I basically have treated her like a normal person (just saying hi, etc, no flirting at all). I have her cell number because I needed it for work and we've texted a few times but I haven't said anything flirty or sexual (because we work together).

We went out in a big group for happy hour last night (Monday) and I noticed that she must have went home and changed because she had a lot more makeup on and a different outfit. When we met at the bar, she kept trying to make eye contact (I avoided it) and she yelled over something about the beer I was drinking. Then she came over and asked how she looked. I just said she looked nice and went back to my other conversation.

What should I do going forward? My worst-case scenario is that she asks me out, I say not interested, and then she flips out at work and tells everyone that I "led her on" or something. Best-case is that she gets the hint and says nothing.

Do I treat her like a regular coworker and turn her down if she tries to escalate or do I completely ignore her and hope she gets the point. I'm trying to decrease her IL but it looks like this is a scenario where no matter what I do I'm increasing it.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Dedication

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Uncharted said:
So there is a girl at work that is really into me. I basically have treated her like a normal person (just saying hi, etc, no flirting at all). I have her cell number because I needed it for work and we've texted a few times but I haven't said anything flirty or sexual (because we work together).

We went out in a big group for happy hour last night (Monday) and I noticed that she must have went home and changed because she had a lot more makeup on and a different outfit. When we met at the bar, she kept trying to make eye contact (I avoided it) and she yelled over something about the beer I was drinking. Then she came over and asked how she looked. I just said she looked nice and went back to my other conversation.

What should I do going forward? My worst-case scenario is that she asks me out, I say not interested, and then she flips out at work and tells everyone that I "led her on" or something. Best-case is that she gets the hint and says nothing.

Do I treat her like a regular coworker and turn her down if she tries to escalate or do I completely ignore her and hope she gets the point. I'm trying to decrease her IL but it looks like this is a scenario where no matter what I do I'm increasing it.
I understand that its a co-worker and the 'don't **** where you eat' apply's here but I don't think i understand you as a person. Why is the bolded part so bad? I could think of a lot worse that could come from dating her.

Either you tell her the truth or say you have a girlfriend. Or just keep doing what you're doing because she's bound to give up... Eventually.
 
B

BeDJ

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How ugly/fat is she?

What's wrong with just telling her no if she asks you out? She will spread the word, so what? If anything, it should increase your value to others.

Women will reject you without second thought or regard. Men need to stop being courteous to protect a woman's feelings.

This thread encapsulates our emasculated society.
 

Uncharted

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BeginningDJ said:
How ugly/fat is she?
Haha she's prob a 7. If we were not working together I would have already banged her. Only not interested because we work together. Apparently someone here was fired when he dumped a girl and created drama.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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r0cky

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Have you considered just going with the flow? Maybe she will never ask you out and you've spent all this thought energy on nothing, or maybe you guys end up getting closer and YOU end up asking her out. Just let go of the need to control and things will work out in your favor.

Go about your day with confidence, not with the insecurity of "what if".
 

om1xr

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First : Emotions change so don't trust a B!tch.
Second : You don't know what is going to happen tomorrow so start living the present because that's all you got
Third : your situation is so simple you just over-thinking and over-analyzing so if she asks you out and you are not interested just say no and if you are a caring/emasculated type just tell her that you are seeing someone or something like that .
Good luck Man .
 

f283000

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Give her the SISTER card

There's the friend card (which is what women give us to let us know they don't see us as f___able) and then there's the sister card.

Start calling her "sister." It's that simple and it is the easiest and less troublesome way of letting a girl know subconsciously that you don't want her.

The moment you start calling her sister it will trigger thoughts in her mind such us "omg does he really think of me as his sister" which in turn will start killing her attraction for you. Obviously she does not want to F a guy that thinks of her as a sibling. This is what giving women the sister card will do. Slowly but surely she will get the message this works.

I use the sister card all the time to keep girls that think they got a chance with me in their place :D
 

Cremasta

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Uncharted said:
What should I do going forward?
You might be able to simply avoid the whole situation by acting innocent/ignorant of her attentions towards you.

Is she the kind of girl who would ask you out? Not many girls are, no matter how enlightened and equal to men they say they are.

I've missed opportunities with girls in the past because I just had no idea they were keen and so I didn't make any moves at all. After a while, they simply lost interest and nothing was said. You might be able to do this on purpose.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Secondtimeround

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f283000 said:
Give her the SISTER card

There's the friend card (which is what women give us to let us know they don't see us as f___able) and then there's the sister card.

Start calling her "sister." It's that simple and it is the easiest and less troublesome way of letting a girl know subconsciously that you don't want her.

The moment you start calling her sister it will trigger thoughts in her mind such us "omg does he really think of me as his sister" which in turn will start killing her attraction for you. Obviously she does not want to F a guy that thinks of her as a sibling. This is what giving women the sister card will do. Slowly but surely she will get the message this works.

I use the sister card all the time to keep girls that think they got a chance with me in their place :D
Yes. Works like a charm every time - unless you are some hipster side on that calls everyone sister but hey, thankgoodness we ain't!
 
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