How do I deal with this: A girl with a pseudo-boyfriend

[sanyo7878]

It goes like this:

I'm borderline infatuated with this girl. I spend all day with her every day (school group). She gives me IOIs, but nothing direct. She is the kind of girl that has good morals and stuff like that (i'm into those kind of girls). 4 or 5 people have asked me if she is my girlfriend. She tells folks she has a sort of boyfriend. THey have been "good friends" for a year but aren't an official couple. How can i break this friend barrier and ask her out or find out if she would even go for me? I can't just flat out do it because i literally spend all day with her and that would just be too weird if she got weirded out by me asking her.

 

[Hitman10000]

Starting today, Hitman10000 will give stupid advice to stupid questions that could be answered by using the holy search function on the webboard.

Now on to my answer:

Unzip your jeans the next time you see her and try to slink your dink so she can see your true intentions.

 

[sanyo7878]

geez hitman, I can't believe you took the time to stop playing world of warcraft for more than 5 minutes to answer that question. thanks buddy.

 

[DJDamage]

How can i break this friend barrier and ask her out or find out if she would even go for me?

There is a very good chance you are already in the "friendzone" because you have been spending too much time together.

You need to ask her to hang out with you in some bar(isolation and away from her peers), have a few drinks, loosen her up, kino her, make her laugh and go for it. If she resists to any of your advancement then you got your answer.

 

[Docs]

Question. How long have you known her?

 

[sanyo7878]

Question. How long have you known her?

I've know her for about a year and a half. I've really only gotten to really know her over the past 2 months. I used to have a crush on her and got some IOIs when I first met her but I could never cough up the balls to ask her out. I got over her and then she suddenly appears in my life 2 months ago. This girl is definitely LTR material. Another thing, people have accused us of being a couple when we were together in public... she has never actually denied it, she just kind of gets that akward look and then tries to explain her pseudo-boyfriend.

About taking her out and getting drinks... I would normally think that was a great idea but this girl doesn't drink.

 

[MyOwnKryptonite]

Does she talk to you about her "boyfriend" and all their problems and things of the sort, because if she does you've offically entered the friendzone. Thats a zone thats very hard to break out of

 

[sanyo7878]

Does she talk to you about her "boyfriend" and all their problems and things of the sort, because if she does you've offically entered the friendzone. Thats a zone thats very hard to break out of

She never talks to me about him in a boyfriend way. SHe mentions him sometimes, but it is always brief. I was with her just today and the conversation turned to him. I straight up asked her if she thought she would marry him and she really didn't give me an answer. I think she likes him but he isn't really making a relationship kind of move on her.

 

[MyOwnKryptonite]

She never talks to me about him in a boyfriend way. SHe mentions him sometimes, but it is always brief. I was with her just today and the conversation turned to him. I straight up asked her if she thought she would marry him and she really didn't give me an answer. I think she likes him but he isn't really making a relationship kind of move on her.

Alright well first off its never good if she decides to talk about another dude infront of you. She could be trying to make you jealous, its a vicious game. Try to avoid even talking about him yourself. The fact that she didnt give you an answer could mean that she likes you both and doesnt want to discourage you from going after her.

To be brutally honest, you need to just throw it out there, tell her whats up. Because its only going to get worse for you, thinking about it and her and that other guy. Tell her that you're interested in her, dont go overboard, be discrete about it, you dont want to over compliment her, some girls find it boreing and sort of bull****ish. Also try and make her laugh while you're doing it, laughter I found is the key to a womens heart, a reasonable women, not a ***** or slut or a girl just going for the money or good looks. you make a girl laugh thats half the battle

 

[omgwtfm8]

I just was in the same situation. Just recently a couple of days after they brok up, I hooked up with her. Even if i felt in the friend zone. I always remained ****y/funny, and didn't develop oneitis.

Morning after was funny. We just laughed it off and had a good time. Idk if i'll hook up again though. maybe.

 

[izza]

It goes like this:

I'm borderline infatuated with this girl. I spend all day with her every day (school group). She gives me IOIs, but nothing direct. She is the kind of girl that has good morals and stuff like that (i'm into those kind of girls). 4 or 5 people have asked me if she is my girlfriend. She tells folks she has a sort of boyfriend. THey have been "good friends" for a year but aren't an official couple. How can i break this friend barrier and ask her out or find out if she would even go for me? I can't just flat out do it because i literally spend all day with her and that would just be too weird if she got weirded out by me asking her.

Before they are exclusive, she is fair game. Forget this pseudo-crap.

And please, don't let this question of "should I go after her" be a shield for your fears of actually making a move. If you're afraid to make a move, admit it to yourself, accept it. Move from there.

 

[Docs]

I've know her for about a year and a half. I've really only gotten to really know her over the past 2 months. I used to have a crush on her and got some IOIs when I first met her but I could never cough up the balls to ask her out. I got over her and then she suddenly appears in my life 2 months ago. This girl is definitely LTR material. Another thing, people have accused us of being a couple when we were together in public... she has never actually denied it, she just kind of gets that akward look and then tries to explain her pseudo-boyfriend.

About taking her out and getting drinks... I would normally think that was a great idea but this girl doesn't drink.

Has the possibility of this pBF actually been her talking about you? Whether that answer matters or not..doesn't matter, what you need to do is to move now! Get her.

 

[sanyo7878]

Has the possibility of this pBF actually been her talking about you? Whether that answer matters or not..doesn't matter, what you need to do is to move now! Get her.

Shoot man, I wish she was talking about me. I've met the dude she is talking about.

 

[sanyo7878]

bump !

 

[Cod3r]

It's over, don't let anyone give you advice you want to hear. Truth is she isn't interested in you and if she ever was she lost it sometime within the 2 years you didn't grab your testes and man up...

Seriously you're life is too valuable to even waste time posting here about a female that probably has ZERO thoughts about you throughout the day. Moving on, don't make same mistakes next time


-Cod3r