How do I better myself without thinking of women

[Dhoulmagus]

I am unable to get women and I really want to stop thinking about it. Everybody says success comes with women, so I am trying to better myself. I am already good looking and in top notch shape, so aesthetics aren't an issue. I just need to improve my gpa, work on the career after college, and continue making $$$ at my job. I have personality issues because of low self confidence due to my race. Also, I let my environment affect me and it has a negative impact on my personality. If I could not just think about women than I think my life would be golden for success. Everybody around me is successful with women and their general answer is," you just don't man", when they are consistently getting sex on the regular.

 

[HyperAnalyze]

Man you need to stop placing your happiness on women alone.

If you can't be happy/content with yourself being alone, how is a girl going to want to be with you?

Girls love a guy who can have fun on his own and is always going on his own adventures.

Go out talk to women, socialize, build up your personality and make a ton of friends.

Then when you do this, you'll value your own self and when talking to a girl, you aren't TAKING VALUE but instead OFFERING VALUE.

Stop thinking about other people, and focus on your self. ARE YOU approaching women everyday? Are you really pushing yourself to go out be social and be uncomfortable?

Stop sitting on the computer and get up and go out.

 

[foreverAFC]

find a hobby or activity to get into

 

[gravityeyelids]

go out and TRY NOT TO GET LAID. I mean it. Dont just try to have that mentality. Actually try to AVOID GETTING laid. Be social, have a good time. Meet people. I mean if a girl drags you into her bed and rips your clothes off, then okay...you can put it in. But seriously, go out and focus on just being social and being the fun guy. Girls will be coming after you if you do this. Especially if you're attractive and in shape..

Are you asian or something?

 

[DonJuanit0]

Also, I let my environment affect me and it has a negative impact on my personality.

I will only stand on this, why, would any human person, stay in an environment where he gets hurt by it? Is it your friends? change them! Obviously they are no good to you! Is it your coworkers? Don't pay attention to them and keep it strictly on business! Is it your family? Move out!

Seriously, by what you say, your only problem is your personality issues which you say gets worst by your close ones!

Since your problem is not the looks, you need to fix your game! I've seen White/Black/Asians, whatever race you name, have a decent girl! Your problem is not your race!

I wouldn't say stop thinking about women, I personally think this is impossible since this is what we are here for, but, you can try other ways! For example, how do you expect to get a woman? Are you going out to meet women? Are you trying to get someone you already know? What have you done and tried to get you here?

 

[kraytkiller]

I am unable to get women and I really want to stop thinking about it. Everybody says success comes with women, so I am trying to better myself. I am already good looking and in top notch shape, so aesthetics aren't an issue. I just need to improve my gpa, work on the career after college, and continue making $$$ at my job. I have personality issues because of low self confidence due to my race. Also, I let my environment affect me and it has a negative impact on my personality. If I could not just think about women than I think my life would be golden for success. Everybody around me is successful with women and their general answer is," you just don't man", when they are consistently getting sex on the regular.

Look at what you read, man! You said it yourself you are a 'good looking, in shape male with a job and motivation to improve his life with also the red pill knowledge provided here, that's not a bad life to have, my man. There are many people out there with worse or more pathetic lots in life so with that being said.. buck up and GET CONFIDENT! Your already high up on the social ladder and you didn't even have to do anything.

You speak about race like it's a big thing. Very unlikely! HOWEVER as a minority myself I realize that you may be in a special circumstance where it actually IS a problem (like an arab person in a small country town, lol) but chances are, your not. If you live in any city, your not. I life in an area where my race makes up .07% of the population, and for a long time I used to personally believe my lack of success was purely due to being judged or people in the area being racist, and then I actually worked on my inner self and my self confidence and mindset, who i was as a person and I started to care less about what people think, and as a result became more confidence.

With confidence became better responses from everyone I met, male or female, generally more responsive and friendly. Girls started to be easy to get, people started to say how good looking I was, ect. **** I never believed could happen before back when my low confidence and socially worried mind thought about how people saw me.

TLDR change your mindset, race isnt your problem

 

[kraytkiller]

How do you better yourself. I was going to stop with my previous post, and then I saw the thread title again. I went through such a great change this past year that I feel like I'm obligated to respond to this thread, because I've recently lived some great change. So here comes a long post of what happened...

I had just come out of a LTR for like 11 months (thats long as **** to me) and I had moved away from her and pretty much had a fresh new start. Had barely any confidence, but my gf had been attractive liek an HB 8 and always told me how good looking I was so I was ready for the dating world.

Anyways, some stuff happened and I entered a serious depression. It took me about 2 months after the break up (which was unrelated to her, just personal battles) for me to be in a MINDSET where I was ready to go gaming.

This is an important lesson I believe. You have to be in the right mindset for the job or you will have next to no success when gaming women. Unless your really good at it or faking, lol

Nothing seemed to help my depression. Women didnt interest me, in fact I disliked them. All I did was party, which added to my depression probably. So I delved into a personal hobby... motorcycles. Always loved motorcycles and I wanted my own to replace one I'd lost two years ago... so I built one. In doing so I met some awesome people who helped and guided me, and also I learned the in and outs of something I love while doing it, and now I have a therapeutic hobby to relax with if I'm upset at something, that's related to something I love.

The lesson here is, if you have something you love, dive into it and as a result you'll be happier, meet tons of people and probably some girls depending on the hobby, and also increase your value and attractiveness, most likely. You might find something you love. This is a way to grow as a person without having to have a female involved. Females would come with the hobby.

Next thing I did to change was go on as many dates as possible. Once I found my hobby to relieve my stress and anger that had built up from my depression period, I was in a position where I felt good about myself and was ready to game chicks. So I started meeting chicks in real life, and pulling them off the web, and going on as many dates as possible. Doing this I refined a really good internet dating method that worked for me I believe every time I followed it, after its final revisement...

ANYWAYS, by doing this I raised my confidence a lot. I am now confident I am, by looks alone, a 8 on the male scale. Combined with other aspects, I now know, or atleast have a mindset of, where I am at (and what I need to work on!!!) If your truly interested in getting AWAY from girls, then if you can stomach it, I suggest diving into trying to get girls any way possible to maybe REALLY find out some things you could work on long term without having to worry about going after women, but would still be useful to getting them.

Before I figured out I wasn't, I thought I was weird looking, or ugly, or awkward, or people didn't like me. Now I know it's the opposite. Give yourself to the flames and youll figure out where you REALLY are and what you need to do.


Anyways, that's just a bit but tell me what you think.

 

[Dhoulmagus]

How do you better yourself. I was going to stop with my previous post, and then I saw the thread title again. I went through such a great change this past year that I feel like I'm obligated to respond to this thread, because I've recently lived some great change. So here comes a long post of what happened...

I had just come out of a LTR for like 11 months (thats long as **** to me) and I had moved away from her and pretty much had a fresh new start. Had barely any confidence, but my gf had been attractive liek an HB 8 and always told me how good looking I was so I was ready for the dating world.

Anyways, some stuff happened and I entered a serious depression. It took me about 2 months after the break up (which was unrelated to her, just personal battles) for me to be in a MINDSET where I was ready to go gaming.

This is an important lesson I believe. You have to be in the right mindset for the job or you will have next to no success when gaming women. Unless your really good at it or faking, lol

Nothing seemed to help my depression. Women didnt interest me, in fact I disliked them. All I did was party, which added to my depression probably. So I delved into a personal hobby... motorcycles. Always loved motorcycles and I wanted my own to replace one I'd lost two years ago... so I built one. In doing so I met some awesome people who helped and guided me, and also I learned the in and outs of something I love while doing it, and now I have a therapeutic hobby to relax with if I'm upset at something, that's related to something I love.

The lesson here is, if you have something you love, dive into it and as a result you'll be happier, meet tons of people and probably some girls depending on the hobby, and also increase your value and attractiveness, most likely. You might find something you love. This is a way to grow as a person without having to have a female involved. Females would come with the hobby.

Next thing I did to change was go on as many dates as possible. Once I found my hobby to relieve my stress and anger that had built up from my depression period, I was in a position where I felt good about myself and was ready to game chicks. So I started meeting chicks in real life, and pulling them off the web, and going on as many dates as possible. Doing this I refined a really good internet dating method that worked for me I believe every time I followed it, after its final revisement...

ANYWAYS, by doing this I raised my confidence a lot. I am now confident I am, by looks alone, a 8 on the male scale. Combined with other aspects, I now know, or atleast have a mindset of, where I am at (and what I need to work on!!!) If your truly interested in getting AWAY from girls, then if you can stomach it, I suggest diving into trying to get girls any way possible to maybe REALLY find out some things you could work on long term without having to worry about going after women, but would still be useful to getting them.

Before I figured out I wasn't, I thought I was weird looking, or ugly, or awkward, or people didn't like me. Now I know it's the opposite. Give yourself to the flames and youll figure out where you REALLY are and what you need to do.


Anyways, that's just a bit but tell me what you think.

Yes it is going to be tough. Most of the people at my college are heavy groupthinkers and worship the old south. It's going to be hard keeping a blind eye.

 

[Night-hawk]

Have you thought to learn to love/ be content with, the pain of the idea that a woman will hold you back, and embracing the feeling that 'I'm-in-proving' to myself that I am better without them. And just maybe you will find them easier, both in not thinking about, and in general, in the process.

 

[JaegerPilot217]

go out and TRY NOT TO GET LAID. I mean it. Dont just try to have that mentality. Actually try to AVOID GETTING laid. Be social, have a good time. Meet people. I mean if a girl drags you into her bed and rips your clothes off, then okay...you can put it in. But seriously, go out and focus on just being social and being the fun guy. Girls will be coming after you if you do this. Especially if you're attractive and in shape..

Are you asian or something?

still guys are expected to initiate, so basically it's being able to initiate and avoid coming across as desperate, needy

 

[Dhoulmagus]

still guys are expected to initiate, so basically it's being able to initiate and avoid coming across as desperate, needy

Ya, I'm just going to be more confident and not shoot myself down constantly in my head. I'm going to talk to everybody at the party.