How did your father handle women?

[Warrior74]

Do you know? Have you ever had a real conversation with him about it? What did your Dad teach you via his actions or words?

 

[Danton1975]

Great question. My father taught me nothing of women or handling of them. Then when I was about 25 years old I read one of Lord Chesterfield letters to his son where it said roughly this:

"Pursue women, Have a love affair...not because of the value it has in and of itself but because in order to get a woman you will need to polish all your social skills and they will be invaluable later in life."

 

[Mike32ct]

I believe my dad did well with the ladies. He's naturally c&f as well as assertive and aggressive. Mom said he was quite direct and a bit of a bad boy back in the day.

However, he never offered advice on gaming or getting women. He probably would have answered my questions about women, but I didn't ask and he didn't bring it up.

I'm a late bloomer who had to learn from experience and from the Community. These days Dad and I talk about the game a lot. He agrees with most of what I learned. I just wish he shared it with me years ago. But in all fairness, he was probably a natural who didn't consciously know what his "method" was.

 

[Warrior74]

My Dad never discussed women with me until after my divorce. We talk about it all the time now. He told me how he married too young at 19 and divorced. He told me how he traveled the world in the army and had girlfriends in several countries and how he came back home and used to run the club scene as a dj and had a lot of women. He basiacally gave me the same advice that people give here. Look good, develop your whole life, don't be a fool for a woman. He told me how he finally found a good woman and settled down.

From his actions...he's the man of the house but he shares responsibility and duties with my mother. He makes the final decisions. He only tolerates so much nagging from her..he'll walk away or just shut it down as nice as possible.

He still goes out with his boys, always has. My mom never bytches or moans...as long as he's not out all night. He doesn't drink much, hardly at all, never was a big drinker. He always told me to watch your drinking because other people are watching you.

And he tells me, now that I have a few things going for myself, watch out for those women who just want a "free ride" on your dime. And leave fat girls alone..they get too attached and you know you only want a little from them and not for long. They can go crazy. LOL. Dad is a trip...wish he woulda told me all of this stuff at 16 instead of 30.

My uncle was a straight up womanizer. He's been married 5 times. And now we find out after he died that he had two other kids in NYC and Cali that we never knew about. One he was actually married to her mother, bringing the count up to 6 wives, 4 kids. Apparently he seduced a nurse after his heart attack and slept with her in the hospital. I found that out this past Thanksgiving.

And my brother was a player himself. Had lots of girlfriends growing up. I was the late bloomer of the bunch as I was more into books and science fiction than football and girls (although I did play football until sophomore year of high school). It's funny now that I tell them about my current exploits, they are proud of me...they say, we knew you had it in you! You're one of us!

 

[realsmoothie]

The best thing my dad ever said:

"Don't even worry about the boyfriend, because the best girls tend to be available only for a few minutes. On their way out of one relationship they're thinking about the next".

 

[Tazman]

Wasn't around my Father a whole lot, but he told me he learned to be a womanizer in the military. He was what he called "Mr. Happy Hour". He's also a musician so I know that played a large role in how much ass he was getting.

He told me later in life he married my mother because he was lonely, so I'm thinking he was good at short term flings for the most part. However, his "Mr. Happy Hour" days involved him doing a lot of hard drugs and he eventually hit rock bottom, but it had more to do with the frustrations he was having in his relationship with my Mother.

 

[RMM]

Not a clue, the only things I heard from him on the subject was when he made fun of me if I messed up an approach in his presence.

Come to think of it, that didn't help much.

 

[Jitterbug]

My Dad wasn't a player but like my grandfather (his father), many women found him attractive (my grandfather married two beauty queens himself). He was very paranoid about women though, after enduring a tyrant mother and b!tchy, lying sisters for years. Any BS, any hint of head game, he walks. He never taught me how to get women, only how to tell that they're lying & walk away from them! There's no question that he's the man of the house though. If Mum irritates him, he tells her to shut up and she does, immediately.

The men on my Mum's side of the family are smooth players - maternal grandfather and two uncles. Women just drop their panties for them, around the globe. One of my uncles has 6 or 7 kids with 5 different women in Europe, and probably a few more in Asia. He's kinda settled down with TWO Polish sisters for a few years now, screwing his young employees on the side from time to time. The other has done the alphabet forward and backward. My Mum had to hide her female friends from him, because he'd seduce them very quickly, promise them the world then dump them pronto.

I'm a late bloomer compared to those, but when it comes to handling women, I exhibit traits from both sides of the family. "Paranoid" enough to walk away when it's bad & immediately take leadership in relationship like Dad, but more open & smooth like my uncles when wooing women.

 

[synergy1]

Since my dad passed in 97, I never really knew. I don't really think he had the confidence though in life. His brother was a complete 180 and was wheeling broads in school/ college, and even cheated on his wife. He was pretty arrogant from what I've heard. His kids (my cousin) last I heard was dating a 23 year old, and he is 12 years older than I am.

The spectrum in my family ranges from really big chumps to pretty big ballers.

 

[edger]

Do you know? Have you ever had a real conversation with him about it? What did your Dad teach you via his actions or words?

My dad acts like an AFC. Seen how he was with my mom for years after she left him. He let my mom string him along for 10+ years after they seperated. My mom played him good. It was pathetic. Caused me to resent my mom for that. A few years back, I got into an argument with her and told her not to contact my dad anymore, because all she did was string the poor guy along. I told her to cut her ties if she wasn't going to get back with him. I told her, "that's my father you're doing that to". I don't like seeing women prey on men.

According to my father, he never got women in his youth. Good-looking guy by the way(everyone in my family is). He dated every now and then, but never got second dates, nor got laid(yet again, he is a hardcore Roman Catholic). His only relationship was with my mom; a relationship that would last for 15 years I believe. My mom was very attractive by the way. He never taught me a single thing about women, I had to learn it all on my own or through friends. I never once got into women conversations with him growing up, until I hit my mid-20's(after I broke up with my ex), which I had to initiate. I still do have to initiate conversations about women with him. The day he'd initiate them, would be the day the sky turns green. Some here have said he might be gay, who the f*ck knows. Ever since my mom left him in '92, I've never seen him with one woman. Either that was the hardcore Catholic speaking, he's gay, or just has trouble pulling women he finds attractive. He's very secretive, so I'll never know.

 

[zekko]

My dad died when I was fairly young, before he ever got around to giving me "the talk". He married my mom pretty young and they stayed married all their lives. I never thought about it before, but I suppose that's why I tend to seek out LTRs.

As far as how he handled women, I don't really remember other than that he was the man so he had final say. There wasn't much friction between them that I can recall. I guess I was lucky to grow up in a family like that.