"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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How did you find your quality friends?

blinkwatt

Master Don Juan
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Lately I have noticed that I only have a few quality friends. By quality I mean ones that are always behind my back & never negative towards anything I do. I feel as if I only have three good friends that don't talk smack/get jealous or aren't negative too often.
Example,I posted a picture on my Myspace of me shirtless washing my car. Girls commented on it often w/ the "When did this happen?/Whoa! looking sexy and I'm not talking about the car!" a couple of my guy friends responded w/ "blinkwatt looking buff,too bad I could smoke your car though.".....now a couple of guys,some of my closer but not best friends I know posted some along the lines "put a shirt on you fag/no one want's to see that."....It kills me because some of my closest friends make comments/remarks about me like that,that I would never do to them. Are your guys friends like that? I don't do anything to instigate it and am hardly ever even negative around them,this is why it stumps me why they act like this sometimes.....

I guess the bottomline is trying to find out whether or not this is normal from friends because it seems like this is happening more and more. Should I just find new friends?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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LegendBoy

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Interesting... I think its kind of natural for friends to make comments like that. My best mate of about 13 years since we were like 5 years old also makes comments. I mean with your really good friends you almost become bross but then the line needs to be drawnn somewhere.

Finding new friends WON'T hurt but keeping these friends won't hurt either unless you find out they are dikcheads and aren't friends.
 

Cod3r

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People who will stand up to you against the majority...

I've got two best mates and one good female friend. No doubt I call and ask something and its done, no matter what it is. And I've just known some the two guys for 2 and ~1 years and the female for about a little more than a year, when you got something real time don't matter...

I had a friend of 15 years that in one instant where i fvcked up he let me go and that said alot about our 'friendship'. I've fvcked up 5+ times seriously with these people and i'm still around, it goes deeper than give and take, its about care.


-Cod3r
 

Production6257

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blinkwatt, I am totally with you on this. I have three really close friends whom I can talk about anything with, but I am slowly coming to the realization that two of these three are toxic people to be around. The first guy is my sadder story, because I did so much for him in high school. He was basically a laughing stock with no friends and I was actually kind of popular and well-known, but I took him in mainly because I felt bad for him. Well we became close friends throughout high school and actually were roommates my freshman year in college. Well now this guy is the first guy to try to cut me down in any situation. He tries to make me out to be this loser, concieted doosh-bag in front of everyone, even though all that I ever did for him in high school was stick up for his very overweight a$$, even physically at times. Last year, I constantly heard him talking bad about me behind my back, but somehow we're still friends, although it's damaged. The good part about this is that noone takes him seriously and almost everyone sees right through his little act.

My other friend is your classic jealous dude. You see, in high school I was tiny. I was just starting puberty and very underweight, with acne to top it all. Well this friend was done growing early, and he's half-decent looking, so when we would hang out with girls, he obviously was the one that got the action. Well I finished growing completely the beginning of last year (yea, really late bloomer), and I have been dedicated to the gym. I'm well over 6 feet tall, and have been improving my physique consistently. Well, girls are starting to take notice and flirt with me over him. And he is so blatantly jealous it's almost laughable. I was grinding with a girl one time, and he got so mad that he walked out of the party, ditching me and my friends! A couple weeks ago I was making out with some random girl and I glanced over to see him on a chair with the mopiest, pissed off look I've ever seen from him. It kind of makes me feel good because he used to try to cut me up in front of girls when I was still very skinny, saying things like "You look like a starving kid from Cambodia" and all sorts of things. Now he has a bad, scrawny w/man-titties body, so I'm still feeling good.

The moral of all this is don't let your jealous friends get to you. You don't have to cut them off, but be careful with how nice you treat them, cause they may end up stabbing you in the back. And it's better to have 1 quality friend then 100 jealous doosh-bags.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Grimple

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Lol. You're upset over that?

Dude, he is just ****ing with you. I make comments like that to my buddies all the time, and they do the same. They're not trying to bring you down, they're just ****ing with you. If you're really that butthurt about it, then just tell him to quit it out.

This guy might also just be jealous.

But seriously, don't take everything so personally.
 

Cod3r

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Well *long pause*

We had two girls, one he was courting for a while and she brought her friend for me. We had a motel room and decided some liquor would make the night go smoother for both of us...

Background
I had only fvcked 2 or 3 girls at this point (basically a virgin) and never had any serious alchohol before, I made him get me JD (ugh) because that's the stuff my dad had in his cabinent, only thing I knew...

Situation

I drank the JD straight (didn't know about mixing) and well I passed out and they spent 2 hours trying to wake me up, thought I was dead. I woke up and started knocking on random doors running outside drunk as hell, people were about to call cops (everyone besides my friend was underage) so we woulda got in alot of trouble...

They got me back inside and into the bathroom and my friends girl got her friend to occupy me while her and my friend fvcked in the room. I heard them fvcking and busted out of the bathroom and sat in a chair and jeered at them for over 20 minutes while they were fvcking...

Like yelling out random things like, "omg she has no ass" and "work that sh!t dawg" and whatever else you can think of :(


So like I said, nothing serious at all lol, we still don't talk till this day


-Cod3r
 
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