I'm the guy who would rather have a few
quality plates rather than a new HB6 or 7 every night. I'm willing to wait a few dates for them. As long as it's just a few and they're not using it as a power thing. If they're using sex as a carrot then they don't know me or what I'm about.
If I were to come across as someone who just wants sex, and then once I get it, I'm going to bounce, then I don't blame them for not wanting to give it up....they'd lose me
That's why not getting butt hurt or not giving an emotional response is to getting "stopped" is key.
I've had plenty of good plates in the past who have made me wait. Here's the typical timeline:
First date: meet and greet for coffee or a drink on a neutral ground.
Second date: Come to my place and I take her out for drinks. We have fun. Then we come back to my place and "mess around" on the couch but when it gets to a certain point she gives me a whisper: "not yet" she says. But I know she wants to. I just give her a smile, pull back a little and but keep going but I don't push it. She knows I'm respecting her boundaries. Trust is acquired. When she leaves for the night I walk her out to her car and give her a hug. This states "I'm okay with not having sex I still liked hanging out with you."
She now knows it's okay to have sex with me because
that's not what this relationship is all about therefore
I will still want to see her once we do have sex.
Third date: Movie night....and then the big bang. Blow her doors off.
From this point on, she can't wait to see me because we had fun
and I gave her a bunch of orgasms. But we didn't talk about puppy dogs and ice cream so she's understands we're not heading in the LTR direction. There's a fine line there, leading her on versus letting her know where she stands.....and that's as a plate.
Sometimes it does take a fourth or fifth date to close the deal but that's usually pushing it. If she starts holding back due to fear of the pump and dump then
I'm doing something wrong. Either that or she's got some screws loose and I sense it and eject. I would never get to a fourth or fifth date with someone I just wanted to pump and dump. Why would I? Waste of time. Plenty of other chicks out there actually looking for a one time deal....just look at POF.
Now, after the third or fourth date, I have myself a
quality plate that I get to bang on a regular basis.
She respects me for going through the motions of "getting to know one another." And I respect her for not giving it up on the first night. We have a mutual respect which makes the plate relationship more of a healthy one. She's not just a booty call FB at 1AM. We can go to the movies or to drinks
then come back and fvck.
I like that better, some do not. I like spending time with them, having
actual fun. It's not an LTR, but a pseudo one, I get the benefits of an LTR, but not all the bad $hit that comes along with one. I can usually see her when I want, but I can also date other women and/or go out have ONS's. Or hang out with friends over the weekend. She can also drive me places when I need a ride, or pick me up from the airport. Plus I get to bang them, and sometimes get presents and gifts and free meals.
I like it this way.
There's been plenty of girls I've banged on the first night that I've turned into plates. Some of them have been great...but, the ones I've waited for have usually been better.
