How could I have handled this: me and the girl seriously STUCK with 2 other guys?

[Le Parisien]

I went out to a salsa bar tonight with a friend of mine, let's call him A.
By coincidence, another friend (let's call him B) was there too, and he was with a VERY CUTE girl. So he asked me and A to join them at their very small table, basically a table of 4.

Then we had the usual introduction and chatting. The girl turned out to be a friend of B, although not a very close one. From my observation, B was basically macking on the girl. He was very subtle and non-agressive, but I could tell what he was doing.

But after some time, I realized that the girl was more interested in me than in B or A. We would have EC all the time. And just to play with it a little bit, I would hold EC as long as she holds it. And it just keeps holding ... I would break it when it becomes obviously "embarrassing". Because remember, we were four sitting at the same table, next to each other.
But for one time, I just wanted to see how far this could go so I held the EC and held it and held it some more. It was so long that even pretending not seeing anything was no more an option for A and especially B, so they looked at her, and then looked at me, at this moment I broke the EC for "politeness" reasons.
We were not really dancing, but we would move a little bit to the music from time to time on our chairs . Once I was doing this "innocent" and "childish" moves on the music, basically moving around my forearms a little bit, you know. And the girl would start imitating me and then she gradually slid the movements into her hips , she ended up shaking her ass on the chair. And the whole time, she was holding EC and smiling at me.
She's not the type of flirty girl, so at this moment I said to myself "ok, I get it, this girl wants me." .

But there's the MAJOR problem: she was B's "girl". They are not girlfriend or boyfriend or anything, but she was definitely his target. We would have had more space or we would have been dancing and stuff, I would have known how to handle this. But we were sitting at a table, not even 2 feet away from each other.

And the worst part: at the end of the night, B was supposed to drop her off at her place, so I didn't even get a chance to ask for her number without disrespecting B.

I'm a little disappointed, but what's more is that I'd like to know how you guys would have handled the situation. Because I still can't think of a better way to handle the situation. I think I did what I could, within limits of decency and respectability of course...

Some input would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks

 

[Dee-Zy]

Same thing happened to me about a few weeks ago. We were at a restaurant. This ONE chick and we were like 5 guys.

This chick is the wet dream of at least 2 of these guys (I know, they are close friends of mine) and she just broke up with her bf. So I know they were both trying to get with her.


To be honest, she's kinda cute - but for various reasons, I wouldn't persue her. Especially since I know how strong my friend feels about her, but the whole time - she had nothing but eyes for me. She wanted to touch my chest, my biceps - she would use those puppy eyes with me and she would always comment on how I treated her differently. (Well sh!t, all of the guys were totally suplicating and all over her. I rather watch the Europe Cup.) Anyways, at the end of the night I could of boned her in the streets but I rather not do anything.

Why? Because at this point you have to ask, what's more important? Your friends or this girl? It's not like I would have a LTR with this chick. Not that she's not LTR material, just that I am not interested in a LTR with this one and these 2 guys are REALLY close friends of mine. It's not worth it.


So about your story. It all depends on how you weight things. How important are these two friends of yours? How important is this chick? Would of been just for a quick lay or would it be for a LTR? Weight the pros and cons.

Seems like your friends must be important to you cuz you didn't want to 'disrespect' him. So in that case, I think you did the right thing. There are plenty of fishes in the sea, why waste friendship over it?

Sides, chances are your friend won't get her, so you can just wait.

 

[Soma]

Easy...

Just ask if he's going for her and let him know you don't want to step any toes. If he says no, it's all good, go get her. If he says yes, give him some room to make his move since he was there first. If he's a cool guy he'll make his move and failing that he'll be ok with you making yours. If he's a tool he'll get upset if you go for her even if he doesn't and if that's the case, you've gotta decide if it's worth it to you.


-Soma

 

[KiInCollege]

Interesting report. I'm glad you shared this.

If these were close friends, you did the right thing. Although, doing the right thing will make you always wonder what could've been, especially since she was giving you great signals.

I relate to this because a similar event happened to me. The girl I've been in a LTR was with her boyfriend when we first met at a club (though they were on "a break" from arguing and seperated throughout the night there). We established the connection with long EC and dancing, and at the end of the night, I got her number and we've been happy since. I didn't care that her man was there, because I knew I was the better man and he was a stranger to me.

Your story reminds me of what could have been if I had yielded because her man was there. I didn't, she cut him off for good, and we've been very happy.

I wonder if you would have had the same outcome. You'll always wonder...at least until the next girl comes along!

 

[KiInCollege]

I will add, since you asked what you could've done...You could have gotten up and danced with the OTHER women there. She would've then had the chance to get up also and perhaps you too would have been seperated from you friends.

In fact, I wonder if she didn't think of this first and excuse herself to give you an opportunity. Ah well, always next time, with some other girl.

 

[Le Parisien]

I will add, since you asked what you could've done...You could have gotten up and danced with the OTHER women there. She would've then had the chance to get up also and perhaps you too would have been seperated from you friends.

It was a Salsa bar, so the dance would be one on one. My friend B was asking her over and over to dance with him and she always declined, so this was NOT an option. She didn't know how to dance Salsa anyway.

Actually, I think I did the right thing, just need you guys to confirm that so I feel better, hehe... Thanks folks.

The girl is moving away within two weeks so it can't be a LTR, too bad I'm not really looking for ONS or quick lays. But I won't mind a sincere STR though...

Now the friend is not a really close one, but what made me decide to hold back are these two things:
1) He's a nice person, although a little bit AFC, but still a nice person. And in my book, a nice person doesn't deserve to get screwed over just because some pretty boy came along...
2) Kinda related to 1, it was really "cool" on his part to have invited us to come over and join them, he could have just said "hi" and continue with his business. After all he was macking, and we two were potential "threats".

I will probably see the girl again this Wednesday if I'm really lucky, I will see what I can do.