"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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How common is this?

sprint

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OK so I get a girl's number last week. I felt like we had a good rapport going and she was definitely giving IOIs. So I run into her again later and talk to her to see if she's still good to get together later (she nods which for some reason struck me as odd, kind of a change in her mood when I brought it up). So I called two days later, left a voice message, and she never called back.

Now, for some more info: the voice message was a bad one. It's kinda uncommon since my phone game usually is pretty good but for some reason I forgot what I was going to say and ended up sounding AFC. So I'd say about a couple minutes after I left the message I sent a text (don't judge yet) saying I was sorry for the bad message. See I felt this text would be taken as funny thus limiting the AFC in the voice message. I mean I honestly didn't see what I had to lose since the voice message was so bad.

So my question is how common is it for girls to just not contact you at all? I mean other girls who've rejected me always gave some reason (no matter how lame it was).

Note that I have not called her or texted or anything. I figure I just count this as a loss.

I did everything well until it came right down to the moment where I had to ask her out. Getting the number was no problem and I definitely wasn't needy or AFC when talking in person.

got any advice?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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619joe

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why did you send the text?its not funny at all

the voicemail message did not SUCCEED nor FAIL.Even if you did leave a crummy one,why didnt you wait to see if she would respond?for all you know she could have responded back YET you doubted yourself.

she definatly wont get back now since you admitted to being a AFC

Other girls who have rejected you give you bunch of different reasons?Man that is not looking good at all.YES it is common for them not to respond for you being such a pansy like that

I know Im being a huge prick right now but i hope you learned your lesson.
 

sprint

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oh I learned my lesson. No text after call ever.

So you think that text did it? I know I shouldn't have sent it so quickly but that voice message was just no good. It was an attempt at damage control I guess. But I suppose it did make me actually admit to being AFC. Plus I became impulsive. eh whatever.

Oh also it's not that the girls who've rejected me before gave a bunch of different reasons; they just gave your run of the mill flaking excuses. Yeah that was in my major major AFC days about a year ago. Never actually had someone cut contact until now. kinda funny and ironic.
 
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Dude, here's the bottom line.. If she met you and was interested, it wouldn't matter if you left a weird message or texted.. I mean who knows maybe she is busy and will get back to you right now?

I think it is pretty common for someone to not contact someone else.. Kind of rude, but very common these days..

I personally prefer the text to the phone call for initial contact.. I normally send a text or a joke (that pertains to her).. not a random joke.. or just be friendly.. I dunno.. and if she replies awesome, if not.. I don't call lol.. and move on.. Generally though a girl will reply to a few texts and then ask you to call, or she will call you..
 

sprint

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maybe you're right, airborne. But I think she was interested to begin with but I messed somewhere along the way before the phone call. I talked to her a couple times before I called but after I got the number. This is because I ran into her. So yeah I guess I'll never know for sure. But I'm sure the bad voice message didn't help.

Oh and I did text her once before I called. I sent a joke thing like you said and she responded with a "ha ha blah blah blah" thing right away. But that was about a week before I called.

it's kinda annoying when they cut contact. Rude is the right word to use. I couldn't come up with it earlier. I mean I would take a simple rejection before a no contact.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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I.A.F.Y.B.

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Don't beat yourself up over it. You live and learn.
 

sprint

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OK so this girl contacted me today via text saying that she would be good this weekend if she got off work early. Now this was a good 5 days after I called and did that other ****, but I never tried again or contacted her since. So I replied a significant amount of time later with "maybe."

I'm really not sure where to go with this. Does anyone have any advice or has someone been in a situation like this before?
 

Pimp-sicle

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Girls do this all the time after the initial # close. They don't like calling back, they don't like calling in general until you have fuvked them. Its too early to tell how high or low her interest is in you. However as others have said, if you leave a voice message, don't send a text right after talking about how lame your message sounded....that's down right chump behavior.

Now that she called you back, just play it cool and never bring up the message again.



PIMP
 

sprint

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haha yeah that was chump behavior...

but she didn't actually call, just text. But yeah that may be because I never contacted her again. I guess I'll just see where this goes.

But should I call this friday or saturday? I mean I think I should but if she doesn't answer I just won't leave a message this time. less of a chance to make a fool out of myself.
 

WC2

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It's not healthy to live life with regrets.

To answer your question, this is very common.

Listen, until you stop caring about random women and what they think of you, you'll be in this same situation time and time again.

You should really be caring about things that matter to you. Some woman who you just met should not be the center of your focus.

And when you stop caring so much it's beautiful. You see, losses like these won't even seem like losses. Because you will talk to many women, some who drop out, but then again some who will fall into your lap. The ones who don't are just very unfortunate.

If you think about all your losses all the time, you really don't have time to enjoy your gains.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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