BannedGod
Senior Don Juan
If you don't have the characteristics of a true DJ, but you try to get them, it's against your nature, so basically you are acting fake and pretending to be a DJ instead of being one, no?
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
How can you truly become a DJ, and not pretend to be one?
- Thread starter BannedGod
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
I'd say no, because if you are a person who does not naturally have the characteristics of a Don Juan, you are still a person who has the ability to attain those characteristics, and the ability to attain those characteristics is very natural indeed.
I actually went over this with my brother the other day. He was complaining because he had no talent. The lesson I taught him is that if you have no talents, you need heart. When a person has heart, he has the ability to create or acquire talent.
And when you create or acquire a talent, that talent has no cap or limit on how good one can become at it, whereas the person who is born with a "natural" talent can only be so good at what he/she does.
I actually went over this with my brother the other day. He was complaining because he had no talent. The lesson I taught him is that if you have no talents, you need heart. When a person has heart, he has the ability to create or acquire talent.
And when you create or acquire a talent, that talent has no cap or limit on how good one can become at it, whereas the person who is born with a "natural" talent can only be so good at what he/she does.
edmond
Senior Don Juan
You cannot
It is the same as all these buy my book and become an Alpha Male crap. If you are born an Alpha you will die an Alpha, if born a Beta, you die as one, if born a moron, you will die as one and the same goes for a natural DJ or a fake DJ.
No amount of books, tips or advice can change you.
It is the same as all these buy my book and become an Alpha Male crap. If you are born an Alpha you will die an Alpha, if born a Beta, you die as one, if born a moron, you will die as one and the same goes for a natural DJ or a fake DJ.
No amount of books, tips or advice can change you.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
I'll just add that the thing that holds people back is when they don't belive that they can change.Smoothe said:I'd say no, because if you are a person who does not naturally have the characteristics of a Don Juan, you are still a person who has the ability to attain those characteristics, and the ability to attain those characteristics is very natural indeed.
I actually went over this with my brother the other day. He was complaining because he had no talent. The lesson I taught him is that if you have no talents, you need heart. When a person has heart, he has the ability to create or acquire talent.
And when you create or acquire a talent, that talent has no cap or limit on how good one can become at it, whereas the person who is born with a "natural" talent can only be so good at what he/she does.
everywomanshero
Master Don Juan
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It's funny all these beliefs out there. I had many tell me when I first started drawing that art is a talent--you are either born with it or never "get it". What I found out is that art is a *skill*--you either take the time to learn the skill or you never "get it".
Same thing with University. There are people who really believe you *need to be smart*. The thing is you don't need to be a smart at all, you just need to be willing to follow instructions. SOme guys retake the hardest courses for them in order to get a degree, but ultimately will do better than the *smart guy* who quits because he's afraid he might not make it the first time through.
90% of our success or failure with women is related to our attitudes & actions. There are a lot of physically good looking men who will never be good with women because of this, and many poor, vaguely attractive men who will have a lot of success. Besides that, you should be putting DJ theory into practice in daily life. Do that long enough and you start to make those deliberate actions a sort of automatic process, just like the bad processes you used to use.
Same thing with University. There are people who really believe you *need to be smart*. The thing is you don't need to be a smart at all, you just need to be willing to follow instructions. SOme guys retake the hardest courses for them in order to get a degree, but ultimately will do better than the *smart guy* who quits because he's afraid he might not make it the first time through.
90% of our success or failure with women is related to our attitudes & actions. There are a lot of physically good looking men who will never be good with women because of this, and many poor, vaguely attractive men who will have a lot of success. Besides that, you should be putting DJ theory into practice in daily life. Do that long enough and you start to make those deliberate actions a sort of automatic process, just like the bad processes you used to use.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Yankee.Hotel.Foxtrot
Don Juan
Agree completely with everywomanshero. It doesn't matter how much talent someone has unless they're willing to work hard at bringing it out. And yes of course a person can change. Men (or a DJ if you'd like) are made. A natural is just a person with the right experiences and understandings which they have been cultivating for years. The problem is people don't see the work, time, crashes and burns or the mindset that makes it all possible and they just assume it's by the grace or god or some gift. Michael Jordan wouldn't be the MJ we know if he never picked a basketball and practiced.
insanity
Master Don Juan
the whole if your born alpha, you die alpha thing is a tad flawed. i have seen friends go from being picked on in highschool to years later take a fight class and come back and desimate the bully. i have watched the so-called born loser resist poverty and come out on top rich. i have also seen people lose what we call "the touch" or their alpha-ness.
it all depends on how bad you really want to change or want something bad enough. thats almost like saying if you grow up fat, you die fat. its all in your willpower.
reading self-help books only work if you apply what is in its contents. just like when a father teaches the son the way of the world, his perception becomes what he is taught if he listens. books have that same effect if you let it.
it all depends on how bad you really want to change or want something bad enough. thats almost like saying if you grow up fat, you die fat. its all in your willpower.
reading self-help books only work if you apply what is in its contents. just like when a father teaches the son the way of the world, his perception becomes what he is taught if he listens. books have that same effect if you let it.
Delta
Master Don Juan
also - fake it till you make it.... it really can work. i'm still working on it.
delta
delta
We've all had years of "growing" that somehow created our personality. You cant expect to go out and be the alpha male right away. work on one trait at a time until it's natural. then do another. You're "join date" is this month. How long have you been putting material to work? We're all born naturals, but somewhere down the line we, our parents, friends, and the places we live shaped our personalities. Now that were old enough to recognize it, we can shape our personalities to what WE want.