How can I get over my negative opinions of black girls?

[ElStud]

Well I'm black and what I've seen from growing, has given me very negative opinions about black women and dating. See when I went to school most of the black women fit into the stereotypes. You know, loud and ghetto basically. A lot of them were rude too. This is why I eventually just started talking to white girls, who are my preference. The majority of white girls were just more nice about the approach and didn't throw up the b*tch sheild so quickly.

I don't know, my fear with going up to a black woman is I'll go up there and I'll get some typical "What the hell you talking to me for?" "Who is you?" or some other ghetto sh*t. Infact, the fear of that is so BIG that even if I see an attractive black woman, I won't go up there because of my beliefs.

So how can I get over these negative beliefs about black women and dating?

 

[prairiedog24]

I think your only hope is to meet some who haven't been raised with an entitlement mentality.

 

[ketostix]

I've noticed the same thing. You tell me how to get over it, so we'll both know. I'd like to get up on some black girls and redress the balance and even the score j/k. Nah I'm just not attracted to black chicks. I'm not for interacial dating but maybe it's not something you need to get over. Maybe it's them. Maybe you prefer non-black chicks and that's fine.

 

[rakishness]

Damn...I feel the same way. White girls are a lot nicer. More down to earth. Have nothing to prove. Yo..you ever figure it out lemme know. Until then I'm just talking to white chicks

 

[thewarrior]

You can usually tell a ghetto black chick by how she dresses. Or the company she keeps. Black chicks that hang around white girls are usually nicer.

 

[imaginemypotential]

Well i grew up around this types of chicks and see them on a regular basis, I usually dont approach them but sometimes i keep one in my plates just for fun,

approach some black girls who arent ghetto and you will sub-consciously accept the ghetto girls more and just brush it off

Just accept them for who they are, I dont like that majority of people I come in contact with blame god for their problems but hey thats the way they chose to live their life so be it

just come from a non judgmental state, at the end of day people will be people

thewarrior i know tons of black girls who dont hang around white girls and arent ghetto, thinking that way will do more harm than good

 

[FairShake]

There are plenty of Black girls not like that. Plenty.

Well, a few. And they're out there. Look for ones with White friends or even just a sense of individuality that comes out by how they carry themselves.

 

[C-quenced]

I've noticed the same thing. You tell me how to get over it, so we'll both know. I'd like to get up on some black girls and redress the balance and even the score j/k. Nah I'm just not attracted to black chicks. I'm not for interacial dating but maybe it's not something you need to get over. Maybe it's them. Maybe you prefer non-black chicks and that's fine.

I'm guessing most of them you don't find physically appealing. To top it off the spiteful attitude many black females have also plays a role. I feel the same way but there are exceptions. There are some sexy black girls out there that I'd love to have. I always wanted one.

 

[PSYCHO]

El Studdo, To solve your problem, just observe them more, for longer periods of time, and then determine their character - don't prejudge - just test.

 

[Warrior74]

Stop being a pvssy?

Here is the thing about ghetto girls and haughty women in general. They are the most scared. You think people don't know their place in society? When you are the poor and the weak you pretend to be what? And what sort of man would you want to relieve that feeling of fear? So if you have a man who is weak and you are weak, then what happens?

Ghetto girls love me, because I know I'm above them, I'm not afraid of them and I refuse to kiss their ass. But I don't love them because of their mentality which doesn't fit with the way I live my life and all I could ever want from them is to smash and dash.

Your in a predominately white college elstud, so the black women there are probably just like you. Find women who are in social groups, in specialized majors, in campus organizations..educated black women and talk to them. Make friends. you need to get in touch with your roots bro.

Basically treat dealing with your negative image of black women and dating the same way you treated your approach anxiety. Get out there and talk and date a bunch of them until you see how they are and you know the differences between them and you learn the truth for yourself instead of just going on stereotypes that you see. Remember the loud and ghetto ones always stand out, which ones are you not seeing? you dig?

Good luck.

 

[ketostix]

I've noticed the same thing. You tell me how to get over it, so we'll both know. I'd like to get up on some black girls and redress the balance and even the score j/k. Nah I'm just not attracted to black chicks. I'm not for interacial dating but maybe it's not something you need to get over. Maybe it's them. Maybe you prefer non-black chicks and that's fine.

I'm guessing most of them you don't find physically appealing. To top it off the spiteful attitude many black females have also plays a role. I feel the same way but there are exceptions. There are some sexy black girls out there that I'd love to have. I always wanted one.

I have to say I have ran into some black girls that I thought had classy personalities. But it's true I don't find them physically appealing. That's the thing that has me scratching my head. How is it that black guys and white girls find each other appealing but black girls and white guys don't? It just doesn't add up. I have my theories. I'll say the same thing I said in that other thread if you switched roles. If I saw a black girl dating white guys I'd assume she had something against black guys. I don't see why if you say it in inverse it's a big deal. The fact that you've said you are open to dating black girls but don't find the the opportunities, yet white girls are more equal opportunity daters dating all races tells you something fishy is going if you think about it lol.

 

[speakeasy]

What I've always tended to notice is that black women in general have higher b*tch shields. If you tried one of those traditional PUA openers on a white girl like "excuse me, can I have a female opinion?" she might giggle and be like "sure, ok." A black girl might be like, "i don't know you, what are you asking me for?"

Not by any means saying all black girls are like that, I have met some that are sweet and soft-spoken too, but I think in general, black girls are more emasculating toward men than white girls. And there's too much of that, "you go girl! I'm a strooooong woman,I don't need no man" attitude I don't care for.

 

[speakeasy]

If I saw a black girl dating white guys I'd assume she had something against black guys.

That's one of the stupidest things I've heard. Maybe the black girl has nothing against black guys but because of her interests, activities, thinking or whatever has more in common with whites. Most people tend to date people they have commonalities with first and foremost.

 

[Bigtrucker2008]

.....And there's too much of that, "you go girl! I'm a strooooong woman,I don't need no man" attitude I don't care for.

EXACTLY. A lotta times, they feel as if they have something to prove and they have to be "strong" (if you call that strength). It comes off as being masculine. Not saying that ALL black females are like this, but many are. That "niggas (refering to men) ain't shi+" type of attitude. It causes bad effects in the entire black community. Because the guys most of them want are the thugs. So, in turn, in order to get the chicks, many black men turn to that "thuggery". (NOT saying that this is true with EVERYONE, but for the most part it is. Be real with yourself.)

 

[ketostix]

That's one of the stupidest things I've heard. Maybe the black girl has nothing against black guys but because of her interests, activities, thinking or whatever has more in common with whites. Most people tend to date people they have commonalities with first and foremost.

Same thing, 6 of one and a half dozen of the other. Of course everyone that doesn't agree with your interacial dating theories is "stupid" and "racist". That's a sign of intolerance if you ask me.

 

[Solomon]

Well I'm black and what I've seen from growing, has given me very negative opinions about black women and dating. See when I went to school most of the black women fit into the stereotypes. You know, loud and ghetto basically. A lot of them were rude too. This is why I eventually just started talking to white girls, who are my preference. The majority of white girls were just more nice about the approach and didn't throw up the b*tch sheild so quickly.
I don't know what area you grew up, but there some cool-ass black females there you just gotta scop'em and belive you me the club is the worst place, I would try a college campus or something. From reading your FR's it sounds like you do tons of game on a college campus anyway.
I don't know, my fear with going up to a black woman is I'll go up there and I'll get some typical "What the hell you talking to me for?" "Who is you?" or some other ghetto sh*t. Infact, the fear of that is so BIG that even if I see an attractive black woman, I won't go up there because of my beliefs.

So how can I get over these negative beliefs about black women and dating?

Elstud so let me get this straight you are afraid to go up to a black chick, but have no problem going up to any white chick?

I'm baffled, but here is my take, when you approach/qualify try to make eye contact before you approach, depending on the scene when you approach your follw up game has to be strong, with sisters what works if you keep it real and just let them know why you approached and then just plow and have her qualify herself to you. But make sure you qualify her before

• Is she approchable? is her body language open eye contact?
• smile?
• When you did approach is she in a defensive postion? If so make sure you smile and build comfort (bust a joke, tell her something that you noticed about her which made her unique)
• most of all Be real!!!(that's with any chick though)

peace

But what matters the most is your follow up game, cause hunny's that put up the b*tch shield with a sh*t test, you just gotta make sure your follow up game is strong, if hunny is acting stuck up, keep it moving, don't sweat it bruh

 

[speakeasy]

EXACTLY. A lotta times, they feel as if they have something to prove and they have to be "strong" (if you call that strength). It comes off as being masculine. Not saying that ALL black females are like this, but many are. That "niggas (refering to men) ain't shi+" type of attitude. It causes bad effects in the entire black community. Because the guys most of them want are the thugs. So, in turn, in order to get the chicks, many black men turn to that "thuggery". (NOT saying that this is true with EVERYONE, but for the most part it is. Be real with yourself.)

That's in part why you don't see many white men with black women. Even if a white guy wants to pick up a black woman, you have to have a game that's more direct than most white dudes are used to. I have heard many black women say they aren't interested in white guys, but they make an exception for Italian guys. That's because Italian dudes tend to be more DJ than most other white guys and are probably the least pussified of white men. I think their game tends to be direct too like black guys and their image is a lot cooler, they've got some "flava" and "swag" as black girls might say. The game a white guy would use on a suburban middle class white girl probably wouldn't work on a black girl, unless she's a black girl who's grown up around whites.

I wouldn't say that black women are all out looking for thugs, but they most gravitate to guys that have that swagger quality. Of course, once again, I'm not saying ALL, but your ghetto type black women(which is probably about 50% of them) are into that.

 

[Truman181]

I have heard many black women say they aren't interested in white guys, but they make an exception for Italian guys. That's because Italian dudes tend to be more DJ than most other white guys and are probably the least pussified of white men.

Oh man, why did you have to go and say that? :nono: I WAS thinking that you were one of the more level-headed posters in all of these "race threads" going around.

So you believe white men are pussified? Except of course, for Italians. Man that's a very insulting comment to us white dudes.

You and I have a lot in common. We both have strong opinions on these racial issues yet we try to be objective about it. But really, as a white man, that comment is a slap in the face and it's really difficult not to retaliate. But I won't, because I think you're a decent person.

 

[ketostix]

Oh man, why did you have to go and say that? :nono: I WAS thinking that you were one of the more level-headed posters in all of these "race threads" going around.

So you believe white men are pussified? Except of course, for Italians. Man that's a very insulting comment to us white dudes.

You and I have a lot in common. We both have strong opinions on these racial issues yet we try to be objective about it. But really, as a white man, that comment is a slap in the face and it's really difficult not to retaliate. But I won't, I know you're a decent person.

See this is what irks me. Italians can be as "pussified" as anyone in the US. The reason white males act more "pussified" is because US society opposes them being manly. That's what irks me about white women who date black guys. They apply a double standard and accept and allow black guys to do whatever. That's part of the reason I say white women that date outside their race have an issue with white guys. It's the disparate treatment and double standard that irks me the most.

 

[Truman181]

speakeasy's reply, as sent to me in PM

the pussiefied comment
This damn 10 post rule is stopping me from replying to you on the forum....

I think ALL men have been pussified to an extent by feminist culture. That was probably a bad choice of words I admit. I think when it comes to feminist infiltration, whites society has obviously been saturated the most. Blacks much less so. Italian men seem to be one group of whites that haven't seemed to have succumbed to feminist ideology so much and where the men aren't afraid to act like men. That's how I meant it. Wasn't trying to say most white guys are pussies.

A very mature response. All of these racial topics evoke such a strong, emotional, gut-level reaction from everyone involved. That's why it's difficult to have a mature discussion on this subject because so often, people react emotionally instead of logically. Another problem is that often times our points get lost in translation due to the limitations of posting on a forum, and that usually leads to more conflict.

However, you speakeasy IMO remain one of the more mature responders (black or white).