I am at the stage of life where I go with the flow as much a possible. I do as much a I can to minimize any drama in my life and being that I am sensitive, I truly try my best to avoid any adverse emotional situations.
One of my plates who I greatly enjoy seeing wants to talk tomorrow at dinner. The past couple weeks, she has alternated between hot and cold. I am starting to find a pattern with all my plates that they all towards around week 3-5 start to act hot and cold and alternate between being distant and super affectionate. I have come to the conclusion this may have more to do with my behavior than what they have going on in their lives. It would be different if one place acted like this, but throughout this last year, this seems to be a reoccurring pattern with all of them.
This plate in particular will from time to time speak of building together, and seeing things long term, and then the next day become totally aloof and distant, only to return to the former state.
Sunday my plate hits me me up and says ive been thinking about whether I should continue dating you and even if I am ready for a long term relationship with you.
I HAVE NEVER ONCE EVER MENTIONED TO HER ANYTHING ABOUT BEING EXCLUSIVE OR BEING IN RELATIONSHIP. I let all my plates know ahead of time, they can do and see whoever they want and that my door is revolving. I dont want to hold anyone one back from being happy and healthy if thats what they truly want. A lot of this comes from my fear of LTRS(Ive never had one). Im just not 100 percent sure I can genuinely let myself go to allow a person to have that part of me without being even a little suspicious. But at 34, you start to tend to see life a little differently than you did at age 20-30. To be COMPLETELY honest, I have been entertaining the thought of being in a LTR. Ive met some pretty quality women over the last year and being on the forum has not only changed my thinking, but has allowed me to change my perspective on how I see myself as man. I lacked boundaries before I found the forum... I just liked the power of having a woman attracted to me and knowing if I didnt get her, she would get me.. I still somewhat believe that to an extent, but I am starting to believe that ALL women are inherently evil and deceptive. When you accept the emotional nature of a woman, it becomes your choice at that point whether you want to change your thinking or continue to do what you've been doing. I am still working on it, but less and less, the actions of women start to get to me.. Im not perfect but I am trying... I know I need to grow up a little...
I let this plate know ahead of time, that if she wanted to tell me anything important, a dinner would not be necessary and that she can share her thoughts over text or even over the phone.. I have no problem with us going our separate ways and we do not need to meet up to prolong any kind of adverse news to me. But she insist we talk over dinner so I agreed.
I dont know why but I am dreading this meeting. I will admit, I like this plate.. Im just not into public separations.. But part of me does feel like this is a growing process and some pain is part it.. So I am trying to keep an open mind about all of this and trying to remember to stay center. This could be a myriad of things. So Im am just throwing my thoughts out here to see if the forum has any thoughts on the situation and possibly what I may or may not be looking for tomorrow...
One of my plates who I greatly enjoy seeing wants to talk tomorrow at dinner. The past couple weeks, she has alternated between hot and cold. I am starting to find a pattern with all my plates that they all towards around week 3-5 start to act hot and cold and alternate between being distant and super affectionate. I have come to the conclusion this may have more to do with my behavior than what they have going on in their lives. It would be different if one place acted like this, but throughout this last year, this seems to be a reoccurring pattern with all of them.
This plate in particular will from time to time speak of building together, and seeing things long term, and then the next day become totally aloof and distant, only to return to the former state.
Sunday my plate hits me me up and says ive been thinking about whether I should continue dating you and even if I am ready for a long term relationship with you.
I HAVE NEVER ONCE EVER MENTIONED TO HER ANYTHING ABOUT BEING EXCLUSIVE OR BEING IN RELATIONSHIP. I let all my plates know ahead of time, they can do and see whoever they want and that my door is revolving. I dont want to hold anyone one back from being happy and healthy if thats what they truly want. A lot of this comes from my fear of LTRS(Ive never had one). Im just not 100 percent sure I can genuinely let myself go to allow a person to have that part of me without being even a little suspicious. But at 34, you start to tend to see life a little differently than you did at age 20-30. To be COMPLETELY honest, I have been entertaining the thought of being in a LTR. Ive met some pretty quality women over the last year and being on the forum has not only changed my thinking, but has allowed me to change my perspective on how I see myself as man. I lacked boundaries before I found the forum... I just liked the power of having a woman attracted to me and knowing if I didnt get her, she would get me.. I still somewhat believe that to an extent, but I am starting to believe that ALL women are inherently evil and deceptive. When you accept the emotional nature of a woman, it becomes your choice at that point whether you want to change your thinking or continue to do what you've been doing. I am still working on it, but less and less, the actions of women start to get to me.. Im not perfect but I am trying... I know I need to grow up a little...
I let this plate know ahead of time, that if she wanted to tell me anything important, a dinner would not be necessary and that she can share her thoughts over text or even over the phone.. I have no problem with us going our separate ways and we do not need to meet up to prolong any kind of adverse news to me. But she insist we talk over dinner so I agreed.
I dont know why but I am dreading this meeting. I will admit, I like this plate.. Im just not into public separations.. But part of me does feel like this is a growing process and some pain is part it.. So I am trying to keep an open mind about all of this and trying to remember to stay center. This could be a myriad of things. So Im am just throwing my thoughts out here to see if the forum has any thoughts on the situation and possibly what I may or may not be looking for tomorrow...
