"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

home depot scam

sexy_kuta

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A "heads up" for you and any of your friends who may be regular Home Depot customers. Over the last month I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you.

Here's how the scam works:

Two seriously good-looking 18 or 19 year old girls come over to your car as you are packing your shopping items into the trunk. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. It is impossible not to look.

When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say "No" and instead ask you for a ride to another Home Depot. You agree and they get in the back seat.

On the way, they start having sex with each other. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and performs oral sex on you, while the other one steals your wallet.

I had my wallet stolen November 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th, 17th, 20th, 24th, 30th, and three times just yesterday, and very likely again this upcoming weekend as soon as I can buy some more wallets.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Breezy

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WOOW. I just laughed for like 2 minutes straight. that was fantastic.
 

sparky0000

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well, in my case the girls were two strapping young men. fine boys there were. i could have washed my jock on them abs (and just about had to).

mmm...all this talk makes me want to call my brother.
 

sexy_kuta

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hhaah thanks
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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sexy_kuta

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what are you guys laughing about!?! its true! IT REALLY HAPPEND! dont be fooled!
 

Scrumtulescence

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That's happened to me four or five times. Except it was always two guys, so on top of being traumatic it also left me very confused and questioning my own sexuality. Who knew a trip to Home Depot could have such a profound impact on one's life.
 

Livinlifehard

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Scrumtulescence said:
That's happened to me four or five times. Except it was always two guys, so on top of being traumatic it also left me very confused and questioning my own sexuality. Who knew a trip to Home Depot could have such a profound impact on one's life.
oh was that you sorry :(
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

sexy_kuta

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Docs said:
Man, you got pwnt. XD

BTW: Was it the same girls the whole time???
no man different girls all the time

i got pwnt big time

soo mad.
 
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